New Dawn[C]

It was strange to hear his new name, he'd become so familiar with 'Brackenpaw' he almost hadn't want to let it go, but now that he had he didn't want to change his mind. The tom's head swivelled to find the source of the voice, Shatteredsky letting out a happy chirrup when he did. "How could I refuse?" he replied, falling into step beside the larger tom. This was the first chance he'd get to properly speak to with his brother since returning, which was strange he felt like he'd been home for a lifetime with how much had changed. It was all he seemed to dwell on, how far behind he felt, and how lost he was. The neglect from Shatteredsky and his odd behaviour had not helped either. They'd never seen eye to eye, but now Brackendawn was keen to fix things, and not be a complete fool all the time, he'd also been shut out. He frowned, why couldn't things be simpler?

His frown vanished quickly as Shatteredsky asked about his time away, actually showed interest in him. Which was also odd behaviour from his stone-faced brother, but it was preferable to his previous cold shoulder. "I learnt how to skin things? And Ambersun despite my many opinions on her isn't a half bad hunter." answered Brackendawn tail flicking as he mused what else he had learnt, all of which seemed very dull and uninteresting in his brother's eyes. Still, he had asked... "Being alone taught me that my attitude back at the lakes was really mousebrained. I acted first, and I didn't even think about what I did later. I was like a rock on legs before, but now I have half a brain and I try to use it. Now that I have one, I probably won't go fighting any wolves. I also learnt I had to tolerate someone I really really hated, and wanted dead. Do you know how much it sucks wanting to sink your claws into someone, but knowing if you do you'll be lost on a freezing mountain for the rest of your life?" Brackendawn shook his head, chuckling lightly "It's the worst. But Ambersun isn't that bad I realised when she actually got me home, and keeping her alive was worth it." he finished with a bright smile. "So, what is it you wanted to talk to me about?"

As predicted Shatteredsky feigned interest to Brackendawn's ramblings. "You can just tell me to shut up, I wouldn't even be offended." he sighed "I could do with some real honesty from someone in our family." Shatteredsky was more than happy to oblige his request, immediately launching into it. His ear twitched in mild upset at the mention of his sister and grandmother's names and he tried to keep the rest of his features schooled, but the more his brother talked the further his ears fell until they were pinned back against his head. He'd been proud of Honeydew before for her rank and her prowess, but Shatteredsky's words gave him a whole new perspective. Something sharp lodged in his chest, slotting in with the rest. "She's never had an apprentice? I assumed..." He echoed trailing off, clearly that had been an oversight on his part. "I suppose she never mentioned one, but I thought that was just down to how..." he hated speaking bad about Honeydew, or saying anything that could hurt his sister, but she'd hurt him too. His tail lashed several times before settling as the brindled warrior drew in a long breath. "... Distant she's been towards me. We use to be so close, but it's like I'm just another clanmate now. At first I didn't notice it, but when it was just us two it was as clear as day." meowed Brackendawn. Some awful things had left his mouth in response to that, and he was less than proud of it. He'd never been angry at her like that before. He never been angry at her before. Point blank. "I don't like any of this, I feel like a coward, but I just want to go back to the lakes. I don't even feel like I've come home."

His brother's voice was barely above a whisper, and the gentleness he spoke with shocked Brackendawn. Shatteredsky was many things, but this... It was a side he had never seen. Blue eyes shakily raised to meet the flame tinged tom's own, doubting he'd find honesty or clarity there. Perhaps he was being mocked, which wasn't something he'd put past his brother. Instead Shatteredsky seemed just as vulnerable as the brindled warrior felt, his gaze was almost tender, like he cared. He felt the same, and for the first time in moons Brackendawn felt understood. His fluffy tail stirred the dirt, reflecting the maelstrom he felt inwardly.

Shatteredsky's idea further conflicted him. It wasn't that simple. Would anyone else even go with them? What about the footing he was starting to regain... He had friends here now. Those friends still didn't change how he felt about their 'real' home, this place was alien. He'd felt at home in his mother's embrace in StarClan, he could have stayed, but he returned. He still wanted to go back, her love burnt him, and it was torturous to feel so alone. For a moment he wondered who Shatteredsky encountered on his own moonstone, had he met their mother too? The silence was drawing on, and he knew his brother would want answer -one he didn't have. "I don't know." he said hoarsely, swallowing the thickness in his throat"What would even be left there?" A scattering of corpses and hope, that was what was left. The lakes had been home, but there was death there. What if it still lingered, waiting for them to return? The wolves would find them, and would take Honeydew and Shatteredsky and Harespring from him. Had he really come back only to return to their hungry eyes and drooling maws so soon.