A Difficult Confession

He couldn't keep this from his dear mate forever. Even he himself didn't know the truth for too long, only finding out the night before the horrible truth behind the RiverClan apprentice Shadepaw and his origins. It was absolutely horrible to imagine, but it was all too true: Scorchfang was his father. Yet Sweetheart had never told him. How could she have not had the decency to tell him that his code-breaking as an apprentice would produce a half-Clan kit?!

She couldn't keep this from Minnowcall any longer. He had lay wide awake the night before after learning the devastating aftermath of his betrayal to his Clan and the warrior code, and though he tried to take his mind off of things by night-hunting in the hopes of replenishing as much of the fresh-kill pile as he could, his dreams when he finally collapsed from exhaustion were filled with the RiverClan she-cat and their half-Clan son. He couldn't take it anymore.

Scorchfang padded to the nursery where his beloved mate slept with his other son -- no... his... his only son -- Lionkit. He nudged Minnowcall awake with his muzzle. "Minnowcall... I... I need to tell you something... Meet me outside, please." He ducked out of the nursery and headed to the side of it where they would surely be alone.

Minnnowcall looked at Scorchfang and yawned quietly. She looked down at their kit and then, slowly not to wake Lionkit up, she stood and walked out of the nursery, after her mate.

She sat down ifront of him and nudged him gently "What's wrong dear?" she asked with worry in her voice, something was really bothering him but she couldn't tell what.

"I... I have something to tell you, but... please don't think any differently of me. Please. I-I couldn't bear to lose you." Scorchfang's mew was soft and very pleading, unashamed by the desperation in his voice. He just couldn't lose Minnowcall again, not after everything they've been through.

Minnowcall looked questioning on him and then nodded "O-okay.." she meowed and smiled slightly. She looked nevously at him wondering what he would tell him.

Scorchfang took a deep, shaky breath. Not wanting to waste another moment contemplating on whether he should share this secret with her or not, he looked up and into Minnowcall's beautiful eyes. "...When I was a stupid little apprentice, I... I fell in love with a RiverClan she-cat named Sweetheart. But once I became a warrior and learned just how valuable and meaningful Clan loyalty truly was, I knew I had to leave her, but... I made the stupid decision to spend one more night with her. Now... N-Now Sweetheart has a son, Shadepaw. A-And he's... h-he's apparently my son, too. B-But I never knew until last night! I had no idea I was his father because Sweetheart never told me. But... I never thought that my stupid apprentice actions would have such a grave effect on me today. I want to escape my past, but now I can't... I can n-never escape the horrible cat I used to be... B-But I just want you to know that I no longer love Sweetheart, and I don't feel a thing for Shadepaw. I love you, Minnowcall, and I love Lionkit. I'm... I'm so, so sorry, my love. Please forgive me." He hung his head shamefully, ears drawn back, struggling not to cry. He didn't deserve Minnowcall's forgiveness, though. He didn't deserve to be ShadowClan's deputy. No matter how hard he may try to overcome his past, it would still haunt him so long as Shadepaw lived. He was absolutely disgusting.

Minnowcall just stared at him with a opend mouth, had she heard him right? Sadly yes.. She looked up at the sky, looking for words to say.

She then looked back at him as she felt a anger growing inside "No! Lionkit is you'r only kit! T-that fish-brained queen.." she hissed still not sure what to really say.
She then broke out in tears "Tell me it's not true! I-it can''t b-be t-t-rue! Like I knew y-you where stupid as a appretice b-but th-is?!" she cried, she looked him staight in the eye's.

"I-I promise you, I didn't mean for this to happen!..." Scorchfang pleaded, actually lowering himself to the ground in a pleading gesture. "P-Please, Minnowcall!... D-Don't leave me!... Oh, great StarClan, what have I done?!" He buried his face in his forepaws, drawn-out whines and wails muffling through. His worst nightmare was coming true...

Minnowcall looked at the dark tabby that she thought she loved, all this was just so... Confusing. She glared in the direction towards Riverclan "If I ever see anyone of those Riverclan scums I'll rip them to pieces" she growled quietly. Not only did she hate the so called Sweetheart and Shadepaw, she hated the whole Riverclan.
She then looked at Scorchfang "I-I'm g-glad you l-left her a-tleast.." she mumbled and then turned around "I'm gonna get back to o-our o-only kit before h-he wakes up..." she meowed shortly and started walking slowly toward nursery.

Scorchfang continued burying his face in his paws, softly crying. He didn't want to see anyone right now, especially in the state he was in. Besides... Minnowcall really needed to know just how much he loved her before... something bad happened to her.

Keeping his head down, he quickly trotted over to the fresh-kill pile, searching through it until he found the biggest, juiciest mouse and frog, then made his way back to the nursery. He placed the fresh-kill down at the mouth of the nursery for his mate and sleeping kit. "Minnowcall... I'm so, so sorry... I love you so much, too much to let you go. I want you to know that I always have and always will do all that I can to make you and Lionkit happy and healthy, and if that means going hungry until I'm nothing but skin and bones so that you two can eat, so be it. ...I don't deserve to eat. I don't deserve anything after everything I've ever done to hurt you. I... I still love you, even if you may not love me anymore..."

He slipped out again and padded to the side of the nursery to silently sulk again. He truly didn't deserve anything he had. Not his mate, not his son, not his role as deputy, not even live itself. He was disgusting code-breaking scum who deserved to rot away slowly and painfully in the Dark Forest for his sins.

(OOC: Gosh, Scorchfang's really got some self-worth issues)

Minnowcall looked at the prey and took a big bite of it then she slowly got up. She looked after SCorchfang and smiled slightly. She then slowly stalked after him and then she pounced on him "You may have been stupid but I still love you" she purred lovingly.

Scorchfang was broken out of his dark thoughts by the sudden appearance of his mate, and he yowled in surprise, leaping high in the air, thick fur bushing out. Once he realized who it was, he forced his fur flat, and he let her words sink in. She... forgave him? Just like that? No anger, no wanting to distance herself and Lionkit from him, no tattling to Nettlesting or Littlestar or anyone else?

He teared up, his ears flattening against his head, when he looked into Minnowcall's beautiful sincere eyes. Then he pushed his head into her shoulder and softly wept. "Y-You're too good for this world, M-Minnowcall... Thank you... I love you, too, s-so much..."

She purred and nuzzled him "You know I can't be mad for long and in some cases that's good I guess" she meowed with her soft voice.

"Now let's just forget about those Riverclanners, okay? You have a duty as deputy and a father over here in you'r own clan" she meowed. He may have broken the code a couple of times and she could probably have choose another mate but she truly loved Scorchfang.

"Oh, Minnowcall... I love you so much." The tom blinked the tears from his eyes, and he looked up at her with a grateful, loving smile. "I don't know how I became the luckiest cat in ShadowClan ending up with you. I promise, I will never hurt you or my Clan like that ever again."

"Hey now I'm actually the luckiest cat in the clan! I have you!!" she purred sweetly "And I know you won't it was a one time thing that won't be repeted". She nuzzled him and leaned against him "You will have to screw up bigger than that for me to leave you, alot bigger" she meowed jokingly with a small hint of seriousness.