 | I wish I could go back in time; not to change anything, but to feel a few things twice. |
Why did everyone have to leave her? Sablestrike's claws still stung in the wounds across her cheek, and her tears pricked sharply at her eyes. Swiftheart was screaming at her father, the two warriors almost at each other's throats as they fought over something Juniperpaw couldn't even understand. She was screaming at them to
stop, to
please stop, but Willowpaw was blocking her from reaching their parents, his teeth fastened in her scruff as he dragged her back.
Rainkit and Tigerpaw watched with narrowed eyes as she tried to fight back against her brother; Boartusk looked away in shame when her paws missed, batting uselessly at the air. Orchidspark laughed, a high, cruel noise, turning to the tabby to crow about how lucky she was to have been rid of Juniperpaw was an apprentice. Boartusk complained about how the other warrior's burden was shifted to his shoulder.
I'm not a burden. Juniperpaw wanted to scream at the duo, frustration digging into her, and yet no words came out.
Hollowgrove and Frecklekit watched her, pleading with her to stop Sablestrike and Swiftheart. Her sisters' expression were filled with disgust and distrust.
How could you not care about your family? You're the reason they're fighting, can't you see? You're making this family fall apart. No, stop. Juniperpaw pinned her ears, and yet she couldn't block out the taunts.
Heatherberry was shaking her head at Juniperpaw. Nightpaw was beside his mentor, pointingly looking away. Fernpaw, Hedgepaw, and Fishpaw watched her with undisguised disgust. Juniperpaw shrank back; their gazes
burned into her pelt. Was she really that despicable? Pineblossom was turning Fernpaw away from her.
No, she wasn't-And things somehow got even worse. Juniperpaw turned around with a shriek as a horrible
ripping sound rang through the air. Quillsplash was pulling Swiftheart away from Sablestrike, shredding the white she-cat as she screamed and thrashed. A sob caught in her throat as finally, Willowpaw released her, kicking her to the ground where she laid, surrounded by the whispers and the taunts and the screaming and ripping and amongst it all was her soft cries.
The she-cat was jerked out of her dreams by a paw prodding her side. Tear-stained eyes flickered open to be greeted by a familiar tortoiseshell tom. Quillsplash pulled her out of her nest without a word, pushing her to the apprentice's den entrance without pausing even as a few eyes darted nervously to the pair. Had her cries woken a few of her denmates, then? Juniperpaw felt shame ripple through her as whispers followed her out.
Quillsplash sat her down at an empty spot in Camp, curling his thick tail around her and holding her close. Juniperpaw trembled, but leaned into his embrace anyway. She couldn't get the image of the warrior attacking Swiftheart out of her mind. Not the blood, not the screaming, not the almost
feral look in the tom as he ripped at the queen. No, Quillsplash would- he would
never do anything like that. It was just a nightmare. Just a figment of her imagination. She pressed closer to the older tom, her brother. Her quick breathing filled the silence between them.
"I've been so good, I've been helpful and friendly. So why am I still so..." Her soft whisper were nothing more than a breath in the wind. She didn't finish her sentence, letting it disappate in the air. Her eyelids were drooping; she must be exhausted after that long nightmare. Quillsplash shifted beside her, said something, but she was already drifting off to sleep again.
"Can I lie here forever?" she murmured just before she closed her eyes and sleep took her away again.
