Ego Check [Moondancer]

Batswarm was a lost cause. Nothing she did ever seemed to change his infatuation with himself, but Moondancer seemed to have more than just herself in her head. Or... At least that is was Harriertalon hoped.

That would be the reason for today's visit to the warrior den. "Moondancer? Are you awake?"

Moondancer had been settling in to sleep finally, after grooming the day's filth from her mid-length fur when Harriertalon poked her head into the den and called for her. The tabby glanced up at her, green eyes narrowing slightly. She was tired... But if the medicine cat apprentice wanted her for something, Moondancer was going to play along. If only to keep herself looking good.

"Yeah? What is it, Harriertalon?" She carefully stepped through the maze of nests toward the brown and black she-cat.

"Would you mind taking a short walk with me? Not too far." She knew Moondancer had just been getting ready for sleep, but what other time would Harriertalon have if not now? It wouldn't sit right with her to quietly let the narcissistic traits go unquestioned.

Once outside of camp, Harriertalon took a heavy seat, tail wrapping around large black paws. Her eyes were not on Moondancer, but on the crisp blue sky above. "How have you been lately? Getting along with everyone okay?"

A walk? Moondancer fought to keep her ears from slicking back in dismay as she glanced back toward her nest. "Alright... What for?" She asked, expecting that Harriertalon just wanted an extra set of paws to help find herbs. Moondancer followed her out of camp, squinting slightly in the sunlight. She was used to taking the dusk and night patrols. The daytime was for sleeping, and she was unused to the brightness.

Harriertalon sat, and Moondancer reluctantly did the same, fluffy tail flicking around her paws. The question was... an odd one, to Moondancer. "I've been fine. What does getting along with others have to do with it?" She asked, genuinely confused. "I mean, I'm not sick or injured or anything." That was what medicine cats looked after, right?

She stifled a large sigh. Of course Moondancer wouldn't understand a subtle hint. "I'm not just checking in for your physical health, although that is important. Burdockroot and I are also here for your mental wellbeing as well and... I just want to know what's in that head of yours- what you think of your clanmates and how you interact with them."

Glancing at Moondancer, she added: "Getting along with your clanmates is part of being a warrior; you can't expect a cat to have your back just because you're in the same clan."

Harriertalon explained, and it... Somewhat lessened Moondancer's visible confusion. "Oh... Okay." That made... sense, mostly, she thought. "I get along with most just fine." And it was true, Moondancer thought. Tawnyshadow looked up to her, she had her siblings, and they knew how great of a warrior she was. "I think Silverpaw's rather jealous of me, but that's not my problem. We were on a hunting patrol, and I'm not sure who his mentor is, but he definitely needs more training. I figured he could learn by example, but..." Moondancer shrugged. It wasn't her fault if the apprentice couldn't catch anything.

Learn by example? The way her sister spoke about Silverpaw irked her beyond belief. If he was truly having a hard time, who was it that was helping him improve?  "And what example are you setting, Moondancer? How many times have you tried to help him improve instead of sit by and watch a fellow clanmate struggle?" Maybe it was the clear lack of empathy Moondancer showed in regards to a struggling apprentice who had just lost his mother. A feeling Harriertalon understood all too well.

Or, perhaps, it was the fact that Harriertalon had also struggled as an apprentice. Except she had support along the way; not someone who openly belittled her. It was as she feared: Moondancer seemed worse off in narcissism than Batswarm was.

"I'm not his mentor." She shrugged, "If he wanted my help - which I'm sure he didn't - he would have asked. Or paid attention while I caught the prey we took home that night." It was as simple as that, as far as Moondancer was concerned. She didn't understand why Harriertalon was so upset with her for not helping, when she had helped. She had caught that rabbit and proudly carried it to the fresh-kill pile. Silverpaw had caught nothing, and that simply wasn't her problem.

"Moondancer, could you do me a favor?" Her tail flicked beside her in irritation. "Go to Twolegplace and collect some water hemlock for me." It didn't mayter whether Moondancer refused or obliged; Harriertalon wouldn't have allowed her to, anyway. Water hemlock would, of course, not be there. It was a painful poison that only grew in the marshes.

"Twolegplace?" Moondancer frowned, lips curling in distaste at the idea. She thought of the twolegs and their monsters as foul beasts, and she didn't exactly enjoy the thought of being near them. Still, if Harriertalon was in need of herbs, Moondancer would help. It was only proper, right? Except there was one problem with helping her. "What does water hemlock even look like?" She asked, only being really familiar with cobwebs and the... What was it, borage? Or whatever had been the name of that plant she'd found while out with Harriertalon and a few other clanmates some time ago.

"Did you not pay attention during the last herb hunt?" She looked to Moondancer, making sure she knew that this was a pointed question and an echo of what her sister has said not moments before. "You should know already."

It had been Rookfire and Thalia who had found the poisonous plant, but they had not been too far off from the rest of the group. Perhaps Moondancer should have paid more attention.

Moondancer's ears twitched, threatening to lay flat against her head as Harriertalon spoke. "I'd remember it if I had found it, which I didn't." She'd found borage, if she recalled correctly, why would she have paid attention to what anyone else did on that patrol? It wasn't like they'd needed to fight off a predator or someone had slipped and fallen into the deep marshes. Harriertalon's words made her pelt prickle in discomfort. Pay attention? "I'm no medicine cat. Herbs are your thing. You can't expect me to remember something I'm not trained for and have no legitimate interest in."

Harriertalon nodded. "Just as you are not a medicine cat, Silverpaw is not a warrior. He's a newly appointed apprentice with very few moons of experience. Watching someone catch prey is not the same as learning to hunt." Who had been Moondancer's mentor? Why was this egocentric attitude still deep-rooted into her sister's attitude? She would have been embarrassed if her apprentice went around acting like this well into warriorhood. But, then again, perhaps this was so deep in Moondancer's personality that no one could correct it.

"I don't blame the tom for not asking for help when the help in question had a high risk of being 'you should have paid attention'. You have proven that to me today, whether that means something to you or not." This hadn't really been the way she expected any of this to go, but she would not back out now. The medicine cat apprentice loved her siblings dearly no matter what... But sitting back and letting them make poor decisions would haunt her until the end of her days. At least now she could say she was trying. "My answer to your ask for help on what water hemlock was had been frustrating, hadn't it?"

Moondancer could only scoff at Harriertalon's words. "That's hardly the same. He's still in training to be a warrior. I'm not - and stars willing I'll never be - in training to be a medicine cat. I know you're not a warrior anymore, but have for gotten what training was like already? Did you not watch as clanmates sparred with one another, or watch as they practiced hunting? It's a perfectly valid way to learn, Harriertalon. I wouldn't be the hunter I am today without being shown demonstrations and applying what I saw." There was an unrepentant air of haughtiness and superiority to her words. She didn't understand how Harriertalon could disagree. Perhaps she had learned things differently, but Moondancer couldn't imagine how.

"Saying your response was frustrating would imply I had more interest in it than doing what was asked." Which Moondancer did not have in the slightest. "You can't honestly compare the two situations. On a hunting patrol - without his mentor - there's an expectation that a cat knows how to pull their weight." Otherwise, he shouldn't have been out without his mentor at all. It was not Moondancer's job to teach him everything.

"My training came from other warriors - not my assigned mentor. Without their help, I would have never made it to a seasoned warrior rank at all. Learning from others is the pinnacle of taking care of your own in their times of need, no matter what." Her tail was lashing furiously, astonished with how Moondancer was doubling down on her ridiculousness. "If that was how you learned to be a warrior, then I pity your future. You are unreliable, with thoughts of only yourself. Even Batswarm knows when his help is needed and doesn't give unwarranted criticisms when someone is trying their best for the clans sake... If this is how you treat others, I wouldn't trust you with my life - let alone another cats apprentice."

It wasn't that she was all that angry with Moondancer, but she was extremely disappointed. How could two out of three of Leopardsun's biological kits turn out to be so selfish? So self-important. "Water hemlock is a very dangerous poison, yet you held no interest in learning about it further. You and Batswarm are not long for this world. There is nothing I can do."