hours overdue

[after this topic]

Mothglow carefully deposited her herb bundles in the medicine den before once more seeking out Flintstar, tone soft and apologetic where just hours earlier it had been cold and sharp. "...Flintstar?" she called, keeping a careful distance.

For the moment, she could only hope she hadn't stepped so far out of line that she couldn't step back in.

Flintstar hadn't moved from his nest since he had retreated into it, eyes focused on the Dacedream-colored rock that he had pulled from his nest. At first, he had been rolling it around to try to figure out his feelings. To get a better understanding on things but that had only proved as frustrating as it normally was so he had quickly given up and just...Laid there. The idea of sleeping had been tempting but his body simply didn't comply. So he laid there, head pressed against the floor as he was spilling from his nest. He could hear the sound of pawstep approaching but didn't bother to look up...Until he heard Mothglow's voice. For a heartbeat he lifted his head to confirm that it was her standing there...Before he let it plop back onto the floor as turned his attention back onto the rock that Thornstar had passed down to him.

"...What is it?" he asked, a heavy sigh escaping with his words. He...He could already feel that frustration toward himself returning, uncertain on if the medicine cat was going to try to get him to see things from her point of view again. He had tried to figure it out on his own, where she was coming from, his own stance but it just felt...Confusing, he couldn't settle on how he wanted to feel. He hated it, he hated how...Fluid emotions were. He wanted to be relieved that Timberkit was alive, he wanted to be angry that he hadn't returned. He just...He wasn't sure what to feel and he couldn't figure out if Mothglow had been right on where he truly stood or not.

...He was just tired.

"I just wanted to apologize," she admitted as she stared down at her own paws, voice quieter than usual. "For what I said earlier. I was... I let my heart get ahead of my head, and said some things I most certainly should not have. You were trying to explain yourself, and I didn't listen."

She looked up to meet his eyes. "I really shouldn't have said what I did. You deserved to know that."

Flintstar slowly turned his attention back to Mothglow as his sister apologized. He...Wasn't sure what he had been expecting her to say - he couldn't be sure. It all depended on feelings and emotions and he...He just could never understand what would make others say and do the things. He had thought he had been better expressing himself when Mothglow had first snapped at him but she had only continued on and left him more confused. He didn't know when she would be angry, when she would apologize, when she would be okay with the things he said he...He couldn't even be sure on what he would feel on matters and he hated it. He had always seen the world in such a particular way - with thought and logic making things so simple. He had thought for a while that he simply didn't...Feel. But he did, he just couldn't make heads or tails of what those emotions were.

He wasn't even sure what to think about Mothglow's apology. Was it truthful? Was she just...Saying it because she felt she should? He wasn't sure - he wasn't even sure if an apology was needed. He... Had he been wrong in his feelings? Had Mothglow been so right to call him cold for wishing that he didn't know that Timberkit was alive or would have been more content with the news that he was dead. What was he even suppose to do with the apology? Just...Accept it and let them move on like nothing had happened? Should they talk about it? He didn't want to talk about it but he just wasn't sure. "Right," he said, his voice a little awkward as he pulled himself upright. He wanted to say more but he wasn't even sure how to start addressing the apology or...The situation in general. There was a long silence as he raked his head for the words he needed but he wasn't even sure what he wanted to say.

"...I-I'm sorry, I don't know how to..." he fumbled his words, tail thumping the ground as he sighed heavily. "...I'm not sure how to respond to an apology, I suppose," he grumbled softly as he dug his claws into his nest. Was it right to carry on the conversation or was it best to just let it lie for a while? Was there anything more to discuss? Was it good for him to try to explain where he was coming from? He didn't even know that for himself thought, it was just a jumbled mess. "I...Forgive you? I do not know feelings that well, I cannot blame you for something you may have...Rashly said. I just...I am confused and...Um...Mad..." he paused, certain that wasn't the word he wanted. That didn't seem right, what was it... "Ah, frustrated towards...Myself, I suppose. I cannot even fully explain where this...Feelings toward Timberkit come from. I just...Am certain on how I feel."

"I shouldn't have blamed you for trying to express your feelings," Mothglow said simply. "It wasn't fair to you. You don't have to forgive me, or say you do, if you don't want to," she was quick to add, her paws twitching as she found herself unable to keep still. "Just... Moving forward, I'll try to listen, even if I don't really understand. I thought you should know that."

Ah, great, more apologizing. Flintstar barely knew what to do with his first attempt to respond and shuffled on his paws, trying to think of words. He...What was he suppose to say? He had stated that he had forgiven her for being...Harsh toward him, was there anything more to say? How were they suppose to just move on? He huffed, running different words through his head. "I...Do forgive you - that much is honest. I do not...Understand emotions - not of others, not of myself. But I know how...Hm...Rash they make people act. We both were...Dealing with emotions. Separate ones that didn't...Clash? No, they did clash," he muttered, a little frustrated - why were figuring out the words so hard. "I...Suppose I should expect that even those who are...Better turned to feelings may not always get where the other is coming from in the moment. And I will try not to be as...Ah, frustrated if I feel I am having trouble sharing my view if you are trying to listen."

There was a long silence.

"I...I don't know how to end this...Talk. Are we good? Is everything...Ah...Content for now? Did we do the..." Oh, what had Freckleface called it... "Bonding?"

Mothglow stifled a laugh at her brother's awkwardness. "Yes, I do believe we're fine," she assured him. "Everything is perfectly fine, at least for now." At that last comment, she tilted her head slightly - it was so strange, to hear such words from Flintstar of all cats, but she supposed that simply meant he was making an honest effort. She couldn't possibly bring herself to mock him for that. "You know, I believe we did. But if it's quite alright with you, I've had enough of it for one night - for now, I think I'd like to get some sleep."