Shattered {CLOSED}

She felt miserable, depressed. Dispirited. Hollow.
How could she not?
After her conflicting, unsettling incident with Hillfire, her mood had been reduced to a small, flickering, hopeless misery. Nothing, or no one, could influence her to change her emotions. Featherpaw could only feel this depression, leading to long strolls as she trailed wearily through her territory, unaccompanied, just alone. She needed time by herself, away from the dizzying liveliness in camp. The silence welcomed her, invited her, like a kittypet being lured by the enticing scent of prey.
She was drained.
Shattered. Yes. She was shattered.
And nothing could affect or change that.
Everytime someone, even her loved companions, encouraged her to join them, she mildly shook her head and exited camp. The threat of Shade had been long since forgotten, at least by her. Featherpaw didn't care anymore. No one would care if she encountered him and got brutally murdered. Hillfire definitely wouldn't. And she'd be remembered as a stupid coward. She couldn't change that. Ever.
And no one could help.
In an unexpected instant, a stinging pain pricked her pad. Hissing, the sound cracking from a long time of remaining silent, she hopped sideways, tripping when her leg connected with a protruding rock. She gasped when she tumbled, dropping sharply on the fortunately flat stone. She had stepped on a thorn, awkwardly limped, tripped over a rock, and fell. She couldn't have been more grateful that she was alone.
Right?

Beepaw scoffed, louder than intended. Well, since she already knew he was there. "Ugh. Riverclan. You guys act like you're so amazing and graceful and perfect, when all YOU are? You seem like a clumsy, deeply flawed cat. I'll bet your father and your siblings and hey- the whole of your clan is like that, most likely." He studied her face. "Hey, wait a minute. Where'd you get that scar from? It looks like the one described in the stories about that one Riverclan apprentice who didn't fight back against Shade. Weeping her face off when she got back." His face lightened up. "I'll bet that's you! You sure look like you would. Hah! I won't bother fighting you. I like a worthy opponent. Like that one- Mottledpaw, was it? I'll bet he would have given Shade some scars he wouldn't forget!" He made swiping motions.

(ima just say that someone in riverclan accidentally slipped it into convo while bee was listening. an npc .)

ooc: now i totally see why aspen and bee should be best friendsssdsss

---

It couldn't have been more evident the Featherpaw had been utterly startled. She had sprung to the air, whipping around wildly like there was a fox about the bite her tail off. The apprentice had stumbled and thrashed around ridiculously, almost tripping again in the process. She had ended up in a crazed, bristling stance, staring blankly and rather pathetically at the ThunderClan cat.
She blinked in a wimpy way, her heart dropping heavily, like a boulder collapsing in her chest. Now her chest ached, too.
No one needed another Hillfire. And she'd just found one.
No. Please, no. Not him. Please. Leave. Leave me alone.

Featherpaw gawked at the tom, pitifully desperate, silently pleading for him to leave. He was right, she knew. It was obvious, she'd already learned that. Her usual alertness had vanished, not even bothering to wonder how he had suspected so correctly. The tabby's eyes drooped, crestfallen, when an idea that seemed bizarre but strangely realistic occurred to her. Even her Clanmates had turned against her. They were undoubtedly gossiping about her pathetic abilities, so much that even ThunderClan knew about it. In fact, it's probably incredibly likely that all the Clans were aware of her stupidity.

"..Y-you're n-not wrong," she murmured, her voice barely detectable, "I.. I'd.. l-like to b-be alone, right now.. if you d-dont m-mind.."
With a true sigh, that appeared exaggerated but definitely wasn't, she shuffled around, wanting nothing more but to have the tranquil silence. Featherpaw's plumy, long tail was sweeping against the ground, rustling the long strands of crispy grass. He wouldn't listen, would he? He'd just keep disturbing her, teasing her, mocking her.
Could the situation get worse?

Yes. It certainly could.

Beepaw raised his nonexistent eyebrows and barked out a laugh. "You're not even defending yourself?! What kind of cat are you? Do you not care if other cats stomp all over you? If a fox was killing your leader, you wouldn't even step in! You and your cowardly clan! Actually- no, just your family. Your cowardly, traitorous, horrible family. Because kin is like kin. You had to have gotten it from somewhere."

《ooc》
i literally had a dream about this topic, and beepaw actually listened and offered featherpaw a bird. wow.

---

Although she had expected it, she still flinched at the sharp sound of his unsettling laugh. Her back was arched in a glum slouch, and she stared dully at the tom, eyes drooped gloomily. Another cat has come. Another cat had come to break her further.
Why?
She was pathetic, that's why.
She couldn't even prevent the tears threatening to prick at her glassy eyes. Or the constant, shaken twitches the frequently passed through her pelt. Or the hiccups beginning to rise in her throat.
Why couldn't she do anything right?

A distressed wail pierced the air when the ThunderClanner insulted her family. Her beloved, dear family, He didn't even know them, and even though his comments had been obviously indirect, she felt even more worthless. Spotfur was the most supportive, withstanding father. Tawnyfang was the best, most benevolent half-sister. She knew that a lot of her family had perished, but the ones that remained stood strong, their courage unwavering.
Unlike her.
They didn't deserve her.
No one deserved such a cowardly wimp.

"Y-You.. you d-d-don't know th-them! H-How could you say that, i-if it's not s-supported by e-e-evidence?" she choked feebly, eyes widened with miserable, shamed alarm. It was obvious she had only protested to defend her family. She still hadn't coughed out a single word for her self-defense. She'd never done that. Ever.

Ooc: i also want the child to be nice but alas it can never be

Ic: Beepaw rolled his eyes. "Oh, but I do have evidence! Like I said, kin is like kin and they've got you!"

Ooc: mobile short trash

Her entire form was plainly stiff, as she continued to bristle harmlessly at the tom. With the violent twitches unhurriedly fading, the only visible movement was her breathing and the faint and occasional flick of her ear. As much as she willed herself to toughen up, and appear sinister towards the obviously younger apprentice, she couldn't. Her tears gradually trickled, like a gentle waterfall cascading, and drizzled onto the ground. What about his family? Were they as impulsively dispicable as him? She wasn't about to question the ThunderClanner, but the counter blazed in her head. She still stayed soundless, not a single word uttered.

---

《ooc》:

Beepaw rolled his eyes. "You're not worth it. I like an opponent who at least tries to fight back. Is all of Riverclan this cowardly?" He scoffed, turning away to go back to hunting.

ooc: it's beautiful

She stifled a sigh of relief, but couldn't restrain an instinctive blink. She shook herself violently. She was thanking him? Everyone was right. Not only was she cowardly, but she was unassertive, submissive and way too forgiving. With a short spasm, she inched further from the border, paws shuffling lightly.
"No," she whispered, the sound not wafting far enough for Beepaw to percept it.

"It's just me."

---

《ooc》
thank you!