My dear beloved, don't leave me (Closed for Dimmeh)

Frostedgaze had been laying by the edge of camp, grooming her pelt. It was that time of evening when the cats would scatter around the clearing, lazily share tongues with each other, and eat prey. Frostedgaze didn't feel like sharing tongues or prey with anyone at the time. She just wanted to get away from the other cats in general. On the way to the nursery, she looked around for Owlstrike, and when she spotted him, she shot him a cold and furious glare. She could feel a growl rising in her throat. She ducked into the nursery, seeing Harekit and Fallenkit already there. Those were the lights of her life, her two kits, the only alive family she had. She didn't give a fox's tooth if Fallenkit was adopted, she was Frostedgaze's kit and she was willing to die for her. She curled up around them, giving them two swift licks between their ears.
"Good night, little ones." She said, her voice gentle and soft.
She fell asleep before them since she was thoroughly exhausted, and her white eyelids shut closed as the wave of sleep crashed over her.

There it was, the empty black void of nothingness that Frostedgaze always fell asleep to. She hadn't dreamed of anything ever since the last Gathering. Well, it wasn't much of a Gathering, it was a night of bloodshed, death, betrayal, and loss. Everyone was affected by it in some way. Yet tonight, she would be dreaming today. A nightmare that she would never forget. After hours, it seemed like, she appeared in her nightmare. It was strange, though, because her nightmare would be taking place in the ShadowClan camp. All of the cats in the clearing seemed transparent, so did Harekit and Fallenkit. She rose from where she lay, padding quickly out of the camp. Frostedgaze knew this wasn't real, it was an illusion in a dream, and if she wanted to wake up now, she'd be back in the nursery. If she couldn't get time away from camp to stretch her legs in real life, she could at least do it in a dream. The whole forest was silent, and shadows seemed to watch the young black-and-white warrior as she crept through the imaginary territory. She saw a vole, but it was frozen in movement, and it was transparent as well. Was everything here frozen? She shrugged dismissively and continued on.

She padded on for, what it seemed like, forever, until she stopped beside the ever hated Thunderpath. She shrugged, heading straight onto it. If everything was frozen, the monsters must be inanimate too. Gosh, was she wrong. All of the sudden, a spotlight was on her. She turned to face where the source of the light was coming from. A monster came straight for her, and Frostedgaze leaped out of the way just before the front wheel could flatten her. So, of course, the worst thing had to be moving in her dream. She scowled, sitting down beside the Thunderpath and growling as another monster roared past.

The only thing she didn't know, was that her own son would be appearing in her dream, that was soon to be a nightmare...

Harekit wandered onto the path, the moments flickering by too quickly for Frostedgaze to stop it. There was her own son, so innocent, crossing the path in the face of the monster. He glanced up, big, blue-grey eyes widening with fear. The monster roared forwards too swiftly, too suddenly, its golden rays emanating from its wide, yellow eyes. The once lively young kit was instantaneously transformed into a motionless heap of brown fur, eyes still round with horror.

OOC: And now, ladies and gentlemen, here come the tears and sorrow and feels.

It had all happened so fast. First, Frostedgaze had been padding along the side of the hard black path when she saw the small moving bundle of fur that she called her son. She blinked, her eyes stretching wide with panic.
"Harekit?" She called once, before her voice rose with panic, "HAREKIT!" The black-and-white cat screamed, racing forwards. No matter how fast she tried to run, she couldn't seem to get there quick enough to stop her dream from becoming a nightmare that she never thought she'd see. A once peaceful illusion had become more pain for her. She continued to scream a few heartbeats after Harekit was hit by the monster, and her eyes glazed over with horror and grief. She shook her head, feeling her eyes becoming wet with tears.
It's just a dream, it's just a dream, it's just a dream...
She looked back at Harekit's body. It lay there, bloody and still, and not even his flank moved to show signs of life.
It's not real, it's not real, it's not real...
Even as much as she wanted to turn her head away, she just couldn't manage to tear her sight towards anything else besides her son's body.
IT'S JUST A DREAM, IT'S JUST A DREAM! She screamed to herself.
Eventually, she looked up at the sky, narrowing her amber eyes.
"WHY HAVE YOU DONE THIS TO ME?" She screamed, directing her calls at StarClan, "WHY DO YOU HATE ME SO? WHY HAVE YOU CURSED ME?"
Frostedgaze wasn't cursed at all, but that's what she believed. Yes, she still believed in StarClan, but had they really set this upon her.
No, they hadn't. It wasn't StarClan's fault that all of this had happened, but Frostedgaze believed so.
She raced onto the Thunderpath, picking her son's limp body up by the scruff and carrying him to safety on the opposite side. Well, not safety, he was already dead.
Even her dreams wanted to make sure Frostedgaze suffered. Real life was already hard enough for her to go through. She buried her face into Harekit's fur, letting a sob wrack her body.

At that time, it began to rain. The rain didn't feel too softly or too harshly, but she could see the gray clouds clearly in the sky. There was no moon, no stars, no light, no hope...
Just sorrow, tears, and even more grief. That was the only thing Frostedgaze had felt for so long, and now there was this to weigh her down even more. She looked back up to the sky again, but she didn't care if there was no moon or stars.
"Wrenpaw, Rainpaw, Graymask? Why have you done this to me? Wrenpaw, Rainpaw, I thought we were friends! Graymask, I thought you loved me! We even had kits together! Are you doing this on purpose?" She asked, even though they weren't there.
"What did I do to deserve this? I fought for StarClan, I went into exile for two moons so that I could believe in StarClan freely! And this is what I get for it?" Her voice was rising with anger. Her tail lashed and her claws sank into the dirt. She then looked down at Harekit, and she could feel the tears forming again.
"I can't let this affect me...I have to-" She broke off with a sob, "Persevere."
Could she really? Could she really persevere? She hadn't been doing it very well so far. She couldn't bare this sight. Her dead son, rain, the Thunderpath, a frozen forest and a frozen camp that she could do nothing to change.

She had to wake up, she just had to. She began throwing dirt all over her face in a hopeless attempt to end her nightmare where it was.
"Wake up, Frostedgaze! Wake up!" She shouted at herself. She unsheathed her claws, sinking the ones on her left paw into her right paw. Even though it was a dream, it still hurt. She continued to sink her claws into her own paw, yowling with pain. Yet, she had to wake up. All the while, the tears still flowed freely.
"Wake up! P-please?" She asked herself with an audible sigh. Eventually, she collapsed onto the ground, her eyes open wide with exasperation. She wanted to get up but she felt too discouraged and mentally weak to do so. She sheathed her claws, burying her face into the dirt.

Why had her life taken such an awful turn?

Yet all there was, was Harekit's blank grey eyes staring up at his mother, his fur being blown by the faint wind. His pelt hung loosely, seeming ghost-like and almost transparent.

Frostedgaze lifted her head out of the ground, and saw her vision becoming darker and darker. She then realized that her nightmare was ending, she'd be waking up soon. She gasped, before another wave of darkness took over her vision. It was back to the blank, empty, black void of nothingness that Frostedgaze usually saw when she went to sleep. She was never more relieved to see...nothing. Her eyelids fluttered open, and she was back in the nursery. Fallenkit and Harekit were asleep, and the other queens and their kits had drifted off away to their own dreams as well. The queen craned her neck to look outside of the nursery. The clearing was empty, which must of meant that the ShadowClan cats were asleep. She yawned, lazily, before frantically looking down at Harekit again. She knew that he was safe, and the nightmare was just to scare her, but it still impacted her greatly. She tried not to stir too much so that neither he or Fallenkit could wake up.
I will never lose you two. Ever. She thought to herself, I will always protect you. I've already lost loved ones...well, at least I thought they were my loved ones.
She then sighed, falling back into a peaceful sleep, and seeing the empty darkness that she always saw.

But she would rather see the void than what she had just seen.

Harekit woke up. "Hey." He mewed, rather lazily. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, Harekit," Frostedgaze said, dismissively, yet her eyes were still closed, "Nothing at all."

Harekit winced instinctively, before curling back up again and resting his head on his tiny paws. "Okay, Mommy." He muttered.