Dark Thoughts

Crowpaw sat down in the small, shaded area of camp as he often did. He wasn't a fan of the noise, and much preferred peace and quiet. Glancing over at the others who seemed to all be busy with something or maybe sharing tongues with a friend, he lay his head on his paws. It seemed like everyone had someone to talk to, a friend or mate or family, none of those in which Crowpaw has had. In fact, thinking about it now, Crowpaw hasn't had a single real friend at any point in his lifetime. It just seemed rare to find some one who understood him or liked him at all. The kits just annoyed him when he was young, and when he actually did try to make friends with one of them, another one came along and completely ruined it by acting like the boss of their game. He growled lowly at the remembrance of that incident. Then he remembered how at his first gathering, he tried to be at least a little friendly with some apprentice from Shadowclan, but then a fight broke out with the leaders and he had to leave suddenly, which seemed to have angered the apprentice. Sure, he saw her again at the latest gathering and she apologized, but he couldn't make friends with a cat from another clan...She was just another rival that he would probably shred eventually, especially since she was Shadowclan. It seemed that any chance he got at having a friendship or feeling any social happiness was just thrown away by some cat messing it up, as if Starclan themselves didn't want him to have friends....Maybe they didn't want him to feel happiness at all.
Suddenly he remembered the one time he felt real, thrilling happiness...If that's what one would call it. It was when he was hunting, and had finally killed some stupid rabbit after failing to catch two in a row; his assessment. The thrill of venting his anger and frustration on an accomplishment had made him happy, like it would any other, but there was something different about that moment that made it, well, different. It was as if he could imagine the body of one of his enemies lying beneath his paws at that very moment, their blood flowing between his teeth in place of the rabbit's, almost like he was taking all the anger, annoyance, frustration, failure, humiliation...All the negative feelings he had felt over his lifetime being released onto the single death of the poor animal that was supposed to act as simple prey and nothing more than that. But to him, it was much more than that. It had been a rush, a thrill that had made him...Made him smile for once. Had he not noticed this sooner and maybe he was truly doomed to never feel any happiness or excitement of any kind. He didn't want that to be his only good moment though. He wanted to be happy like everyone else. It wasn't fair if he was always miserable and looked at as that grumpy runt who refused to get along with anyone. To him, he thought it was time he deserved some respect. He had thought about this before, but in a different way. He had promised himself to become the best warrior in all of Windclan and prove he was a cat to respect and listen to, not boss around and blame stuff on(despite the trouble he got into often being his own fault). But he realized over his apprentice days, perhaps that wasn't enough. Maybe, he needed to put down a heavier claw, and make sure his name was remembered by the clans for many moons to come. No one would ever challenge him again, and then he would have the endless thrill of respect and power that would fill the gap that has been empty of any true trust to anyone besides himself all this time. He'd become the strongest cat any of the clans have ever seen, and he'd make sure they all knew it. Whether they remembered him through respect of his strength, or fear of his fangs. Elders would tell tales of his battles that would give even senior apprentices nightmares in the other clans, and Windclan would finally give him the recognition he had been working so hard to get.
One day, he'd do it. He'd fulfill his new dream: To become the strongest, most feared cat in clan history.

Looking up at the stars above, Crowpaw narrowed his green eyes, looking away and creeping farther back into the shadows. It was about time he abandoned Starclan the same way he believed they abandoned him. Perhaps he could find trust in a different group of ancestors, ones who shared similar interests. Whoever they turned out to be, if anyone at all, he figured they'd at least be better than Starclan. But what was he thinking? He didn't even need ancestors to guide him...He was perfectly fine on his own, and always has been.
The small tom shut his eyes, letting darkness envelope his mind as he drifted into sleep, the dreadful thoughts still on his mind. But he couldn't sleep long, as he felt some stupid leaf brush up and land on his back. Grumbling in annoyance, he rolled over, opening his eyes a little. He quickly regretted it though, as everything seemed a little brighter. Even the shade he slept in was gone. With a growl of annoyance, he got up and shook out his fur. Perhaps he'd take a walk to tire himself out, then come back. However as he exited camp, he stopped dead in his tracks. In front of him was not the regular rolling hills of Windclan territory, but instead a deep, shadowy, forested area stretching who knows how far. The shadows of the trees had formed a solid line of darkness to separrate it from Windclan camp, like some sort of border. It was very odd to him, but the longer Crowpaw gazed into the seemingly endless darkness of the forest, the more at peace he felt. Another gentle wind came, blowing the leaf that had drifted on him over the border so it was swallowed up by the shadows. It was like the regular, small patch of shade that Crowpaw normally slept in so comfortably had suddenly become huge enough to cover this entire forest area. Tipping his head, the small tom though he could hear a distant voice and the gentle tap of pawsteps as some one approached. Realizing they were in fact pawsteps coming from the timber, Crowpaw took a step forward, readying himself in a battle position, claws unsheathed and fangs bared. Whoever was coming better not come intruding into camp, even if this was a dream...Or at least, he thought it was.

Ooc: So basically, Crowpaw's being visited by the Place of No Stars(in his dreams, of course) as his heart begins to lean more to the dark side and he loses faith in Starclan, as well as many of his clanmates.

Glossy blue eyes walked out if the shadows, the grey tabby Tom smiled as he looked at the smaller cat. "Well... What brings you here?" He asked, his voice low, but not quite a growl. He walked around the younger cat, lifting up his chin to get a better look if the other Tom he showed the bite marks if the flamed colored leader, who killed the grey Tom when he was still living.

He smiled slightly, waiting for the darker Tom to reply. He flickered his tail, standing strait in the cats face.

OCC: Sorry I haven't gotten to this I've been busy.

Crowpaw growled lowly, watching the newcomer carefully. He wasn't sure what to make of the tom yet, as he wasn't acting hostile or friendly. His question bugged him a little, since he had no idea how he got here. "What are you talking about? This is my dream! Who are you and tell me why I shouldn't shred your pelt?" He hissed, studying the blue-eyed cat. He didn't smell like any of the four clans, so was he a rogue?

The Tom chuckled. "Because," he choked down an other laugh. "I am willing to be your friend." He smiled even more now. "Because I see that you are rather a lonely cat in the pity of your stupid clan." He cocked his head to the left. "But if you ever wish to know where you are, you'll fallow in my paw prints." He said, rather cheerfully. "Oh and I'm Icestream... May I ask who you are?" Icestream's eyes grew even more bright.

Crowpaw flinched in shock. Be my friend? He thought. Icestream...Who is he? He sheathed his claws, growling though at his insult to Windclan. "It may be true that I don't exactly have any friends or family in my clan, and no one seems to like me. Life to me seems more difficult than it is for others, but that just means I'm stronger! It's still my clan, whether I feel welcome there or not." But why do I hang onto it? What's the point in being loyal to a clan you can hardly trust? He asked himself, shaking his head. "Whatever. I'm Crowpaw. I've never seen you around before, though you know of the clans...Are you maybe a survivor of the Deomilities? Or maybe an exiled cat?" Crowpaw questioned, growing a little suspicious every moment he spent here in this place. He wanted to know why he was here, and where here was, so he followed this 'Icestream' as instructed. Sounded like a clan name, but he couldn't go assuming things. He'd keep his claws away as long as Icestream here didn't pull any tricks.

Icestream stopped smiling at 'exiled cat'. He didn't want to remember the time he was in a clan.. nor did he want to remember Flamestar. "I'm the former deputy of Skyclan... Oh you know that clan that got killed off." He smiled. "But never the less let me show you around. But if you're too slow have fun getting lost. And let me tell you about the place you're going to be joining with us." He started hurrying down a foggy path that was very unnoticeable.

OCC: so what is your plot?

Ooc: Crow has always been a little uncomfortable of others, and he never seemed to be able to make any friends due to his bad social skills. Others always seemed to get mad at him, and he was gradually losing trust in his clan. This made his heat weak and since he had no one to turn to, he made up a new dream to force others to respect him, by doing things his own way and leaving his name in clan history. Obviously he has no plan to do that, since he just thought it up before he fell asleep, and a dark forest cat was supposed to sense his weak heart and take advantage of it to add some one to their ranks. He already lost faith in Starclan and he hates many of his clanmates, so I'm trying to make a legit evil character, since many previous ones in the past have been "mary-sue". He's quickly losing trust in his own clan therefor making his 'goal' a little more crazed as he's helped into the darkness by his only seemingly 'friend', which in this case is Icestream I suppose since he's the only Dark Forest cat so far. We could use another one, right? x) I wanted to try something new, so Crowclaw was born.

Ic: "What?! Then you must be..." Crowpaw trailed off. ...Dead. The sentence finished in his mind. So this was a Skyclan cat? He seemed so...Odd though. Yet he says he was Skyclan deputy. "A-anyways, what do you mean by joining? I don't even know how I got here. This isn't Starclan is it?" A sudden threatened feeling came upon him as he wondered that if he was truly in Starclan, maybe they brought him here in his dreams to punish him. I can take a few dumb, dead cats. He thought with a growl. Despite it however, he kept up a good pace with Icestream, looking around as they entered the shadowy forest. The place seemed so...Dull. Looking up, he couldn't even see the moon shining. He twitched a whisker, looking forward again. This was interesting.

Icestream flickered his ears at his first statement. "Dead?" He asked, and he nodded answering himself. "Yes, I am dead." He kept walking. "First things first, this is the Dark forest, and no I am your other ancestor, I am a part from Starclan. And by Joining I mean you can join me in the dark forest... I can give you power." He smiled, coming to a stop. What laid there before the two toms was Icestream's camp. There was only one den, through. He thought no one was coming to join him in this pity of darkness that never ended. He smiled looking at the other cat. "So what do you say about joining?" His eyes lit up looking for a 'yes' to come out of the tom.

Crowpaw opened his mouth to reply, but no words came out. Power? Is that what he wanted? What he needed? Power earns respect, Crowpaw. For a moment he thought he heard another voice in his mind, though it sounded just like himself. Isn't that what you wanted? Respect and the power to destroy all who defy you or your clan? What about your clan? Do they matter anymore? This tom could be the answer to all your problems, whether he's a friend or not. This is your one and only chance!
The small tom blinked, shutting his mouth. So he did have other ancestors...The Dark Forest. He hadn't heard of them. Perhaps Starclan didn't want him to know of them in fear that he would leave. He let out a huff. Tough luck, Starclan. He thought with a smile. "Okay, I'll join. But I'm not your apprentice. I may seem small, but I'm strong." He warned, as to show he meant business. There was no way Crowpaw would stay long if this cat were to treat him like the others. Fortunately, so far that didn't seem to be the case. Maybe this truly was where he belonged...Where he was wanted.

Icestream nodded. "Well, Crowpaw, I could tech you more stronger moves, then what your clan can offer you to learn, but, for now we can make you a nest. But for now lets head down to the Dead Pool to get some moss for your nest." He purred lightly. Finally someone who thinks like me He swished his tail, telling the younger tom to fallow after him.

A nest? Crowpaw blinked in surprise. Would he be able to sleep here or something? Perhaps if he was wounded in training or something. Was it even possible to sleep in your own unconscious dreams? Crowpaw shrugged and followed. He didn't plan to sleep here anyways, whether it was possible or not. He only just met Icestream and was still a little suspicious about him. Still, he liked how the tom had seemingly a lot in common with him. Following Icestream, the smaller apprentice took this chance to take a good look around, but careful to keep up the pace.

When the two toms found the pool, he looked around. "hmph, this is the only water that this place has, so you better start looking for moss. Plus it almost morning we have to get moving! Hurry!" He squeaked, padding away along the shore lines.

Crowpaw rolled his eyes and quickly started looking for moss. He checked some rather dark-colored stones and on some decaying tree bark, eventually finding quite a bit of moss growing on a log. "Found some!" He called, quickly removing clumps of it for the nest. He still didn't know why he was doing this, but figured he'd know soon.

Icestream flickered his ears and muffled "Good! Come along!" He mewed, padding away quickly back to his camp. He looked behind his shoulder to make sure the younger cat wasn't lost.

Ooc: Any future visits can be held in this topic if you like. I figured it'd keep out spam.

Ic: Crowpaw was, luckily, keeping up just behind him, carrying a large lump of moss in his mouth. "So...When are we starting this special training? I'm becoming a warrior soon, I'll have you know." He meowed, putting the moss down once they reached the camp. "Also, what are we going to do once I'm stronger? I want to prove to the clans that I'm not some runt to be looked down upon. I'd do anything to get some respect and power around here, even if that means forcing it with fear. But there's not much I can do about that now." He grumbled. "Uhg, I'm tired of my clanmates always yelling at me and saying stuff like 'Stop it Crowpaw!' or 'You're such a bossy brat Crowpaw!' when I'm just trying to earn my place in my clan. But everyone's always forcing me down, as if I'm nobody. I don't matter to anyone. Well, I'll show them...My name will go down in history!" He froze, shivering with anger and hatred. His teeth were bared and his claws had instinctively slid out. Noticing this, he calmed down quickly, sheathing his claws. "...Sorry. I was just remembering stuff. I don't exactly have any friends, you know. not even in my clan, which is one reason why I don't really know where to start. No one trusts me anymore...Not that I trust them either." The tom muttered.