Rose-Colored Glasses [c]

Thistlepaw would never get used to walking beside these warriors that happened to be the same age as him. His own littermate, and now another cat whom he had once shared the apprentice den with. Laurelriver. Today was just a simple border patrol, so there was not much for the two of them to do as the rest of the patrol walked ahead of them. Normally he was content to just keep to himself, but today it just felt.... awkward. He knew this cat to be a friend of his brother's.

So that meant he should at least try to get to know her, right?

"I don't think I ever congratulated you on your name. I know you have been a warrior for a while now. Is it everything that cats look forward to?" He looked at the she-cat with expectant eyes. It was a bit of a stiffer topic than he would have liked, but perhaps the conversation would grow more natural.

Thistlepaw nodded along to what Laurelriver had to say. But when she turned the question around on him, he couldn't help but give her an odd look.

"Ah, I suppose it is just as you would expect...? I'm- I don't think it would be very different from what it was like for you...? Just training like normal, I suppose every now and then I am asked to run errands that other apprentices wouldn't, like fetching a cat for Rapidfire to speak to but, I feel like it is a pretty standard apprenticeship...?"

Although as he spoke, he could hear the judgements dripping from his voice, even though he harbored no ill intent. For some reason, met with Laurelriver's genuine smile, that actually made him laugh a bit. Or at least brought forth a snort of amusement.

"I'm sorry, that- that sounded so condescending. I promise I didn't mean it that way. I guess it's not a question I expected to be asked from someone who already went through apprenticeship. I'm not a... ah, how would you say it? I'm not usually a social cat. I guess some would say I'm not very expressive. I have learned from Leopardwind that apparently that can translate to a disdain being held when in reality I harbor no bad feelings. I'm... still not sure how to go about that. I'm trying to, though."

At Laurelriver's comment, Thistlepaw couldn't help but snort. "I'm fairly certain it occurs with me more often than most. But I suppose I'll take your word for it."

Although it was hard for him to imagine someone like Leopardwind, or Falconpaw, or even Laurelriver herself to struggle in that regard. It felt like things of that regard just came naturally to them. The world was meant to know those cats' names.

At the thought of talking to the others, though. Well, Laurelriver made it seem so easy. "I feel as though that conversation may be easier said than done. I have never been good with expressing affection. Not in the way I feel they need. There is a very good reason cats do not gravitate towards me. I fear I am not capable of providing the love they search for. Even if that love does exist."

He let out a sigh even thinking about it. How had he let himself mess up so badly?

Thistlepaw let out a hum, contemplating Laurelriver's words. Then he smiled. "I'm worried it may be easier said than done, but I suppose I will take your word for it. I will have to speak to them all, soon. After all, I would hate to be the one getting smacked by you."

Thistlepaw gave an awkward smirk, gently nudging Laurelriver and chuckling, before going back to being serious. It was probably too soon to start joking around like that, and very awkward, too. It was hard enough baring his heart as he was.

"Thank you for having this conversation with me, Laurelriver. It has helped a lot. It has really put things into perspective for me. You are a really intelligent cat, you know."