i can see the monster [c]

In the weeks that followed the war, he'd tried not to notice the way the clan still looked at him. They regarded Sunfire like he was some raging, untrustworthy monster. It was something he tried not to take personally, because they hadn't been there, they didn't know. But try as he might, the bitterness had still crept in, and there it had sat, festering and thriving until, in the darkest moments, it was all he felt. They don't trust you. You've done everything in your power to protect them and they despise you for it. Did they not know that he'd killed for them? That he'd nearly died for them? Or did they just not care, because the thought of blood and death and destruction was too messy, even when it kept the peace they so desperately sought?

Patrols were something he had begun to dread, especially now that it was Honeydew organizing them. But he rarely went out of his way to make conversation, anyway, and most were content to leave it that way, so it wasn't too bad. There was the rare occasion where Mintglade accompanied him, or his mother did, or Stormwatcher, and those generally were the patrols he looked forward to, but tonight, by some stroke of luck, it was Shatteredsky, and he'd been waiting to get his nephew alone for nearly half a moon.

The two toms had been walking in icy silence since they left the camp, but when they were a decent enough distance from camp, for once, Sunfire was the one to break the silence. "You threatened my mother." He said, simply. His tone wasn't accusatory, or venomous... just matter of fact - he wanted to see how the young warrior would respond... because the way this patrol would end heavily depended on his answer.

To break the tension, Sunfire stepped off the path and stood on his hind legs against a tree trunk. Sharp claws dragged down, splintering pieces of bark and leaving furrows where it came off in small chunks. It was a suboptimal way of marking the border, but the instinct to put a little bit of distance between himself and Shatteredsky - though for whose safety was still in question - was enough of an excuse to do so. His nephew had responded without any sort of time to think about his answer, and Sunfire could feel the anger that radiated off of him. It made his hackles want to spike, it made him want to fight, but Shatteredsky was a clanmate, not an enemy... and it would hurt SkyClan if he were to die or get run off.

"Wolfblossom didn't assign that battle patrol," he said shortly, turning and letting his front half fall heavily back to the ground. Yellow eyes studied Shatteredsky as he considered his next words. "Birdstar did. And now she's dead."

He blinked, one ear twisting back. "But you're right... Honeydew never should have been on that patrol. She isn't made out of the same stuff that you and I are. I should have listened, when you told me that the first time." He thought back to the training session he'd done with Falconmoon's kits when they were all apprentices, how Shatteredsky had challenged him then. "It should have been you."

He had to fight the urge to roll his eyes as Shatteredsky blamed Wolfblossom again, but he couldn't help but halfheartedly agree that, had his mother spoken up, Birdstar would probably have listened. It would be counterintuitive to mention that out loud, though, so Sunfire just nodded along as his nephew continued, marking the border while they walked along, keeping an ear out for any intruders.

They remained unbothered, however, which Sunfire was thankful for especially as Shatteredsky aired out his grievances about SkyClan's current state. It wasn't necessarily a shock to him, that his clanmate thought this way... in some aspects, Shatteredsky reminded Sunfire of himself... except that for whatever reason, the younger tom's devotion didn't extend any further than his sister. It was a shame... because it made him a threat, if he wasn't willing to cooperate.

Another few moments passed between them before Sunfire spoke again. "I tried. But you can't teach someone who doesn't want to learn. You can't make a killer out of everyone... and there is a place in the clan for... softer cats... just not in war." He wouldn't begrudge a cat whose calling was purely to hunt, or taking care of kits and elders and the sick. But those cats also would never belong on a battlefield, because they were a liability. They got clanmates killed.

"The problem is, most of the clan does not feel the same way. Their Code is too precious to them. It blinds them to the truth of it." Sunfire shook his head, weariness shining in his gaze. "But those that do feel the same way... those of us who are willing to get our paws dirty... we need to work together to protect the ones we love - even if it's not what they want." He paused, taking a moment to look over and catch Shatteredsky's eye as he deliberated whether or not to continue. He wanted the other tom's help, but if there was anything that Shatteredsky had proven, it was that he was unpredictable, and Sunfire was wary of how he would react to his proposal. Brow furrowed, Sunfire slicked his ears back, taking a quick breath.

"ThunderClan and RiverClan may have achieved their goal in killing Beechfang, but they won't stop there... not now that so much blood has been spilled. They'll come for us again." His eyes sharpened. "Unless we get to them first, and make a statement they can't ignore." He leaned forward, voice serious and genuine. "We can stop anyone else from getting hurt, if we work together. Wolfblossom won't like it, probably. Neither will Honeydew. But someone has to lead the clan into safety. It should be us." He blinked, shaking the tension from his shoulders. "I saw the warrior that hurt Honeydew. I can help you find her. And hurt her... unless you want the sole pleasure, of course."

Sunfire sank his claws into the cold ground. "We will have to maintain some level of subtly, however... I'm afraid there will be enough obstacles without having to worry about our own clanmates' interference."

At first, it didn't seem like the other warrior was interested in what Sunfire was pitching, and the yellow tom steeled his gaze, deliberating on the likelihood of someone asking questions if he returned to camp from this patrol alone. He was confused at Shatteredsky's stance... the young tom insisted that there was no place in the clan for softer, non battle-inclined cats, and yet his dear sister, the one he so zealously guarded, was one in the same. Where did he think that Honeydew would fit, in this very black and white world he was building? But it wasn't something Sunfire had any interest in explaining.

His nephew did perk up when he mentioned the ThunderClan warrior, though. Sunfire smiled. "Attack. Maim. Kill. It's all the same to me," he said with the shrug of a shoulder. "The way I see it, all of ThunderClan - and RiverClan - should pay for what they did. Invading our territory, injuring our clanmates - injuring Honeydew, of all cats... no, she didn't deserve that."

Yellow eyes flashed in the sunlight as Sunfire stared up through the trees. "I'll help you get your revenge - to whatever extent you desire, Shatteredsky. All I ask in return is that we work together, to guarantee the safety of the clan. It will be bloody, there will be death. But I don't think that's something either of us is terribly opposed to. In the end, SkyClan will be safe. Honeydew will be safe. What do you say?"