The future's in your paws. Shape it well.Roleplay in a cat Clan of warriors. Based off the Warriors series by Erin Hunter. Takes place in an AU before the cats in the books existed.
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Subject: Oatpaw's Moonstone Journey Thu 15 Feb 2024 - 5:27
You can’t fix the past, but you can change the future.
Sootstorm prodded Oatpaw's side with a paw to wake the apprentice up. Daisyfang was still feeling a little under the weather, so like he had done for Eveningpaw, he now had to guide Oatpaw along his Moonstone journey. The bundle of bitter herbs was pushed to the half-awake tom, with a sympathic look from the deputy as he watched the apprentice swallow the leaves. Sootstorm had not eaten herbs in a long time, but the bitter juice never truly left one's mouth after taking one too many. Once they were both ready, Sootstorm led Oatpaw out of camp and cross the border. He followed the path that he used previously for Eveningpaw's journey, and found that now that he didn't have to focus on the road as much he could enjoy the view that climbing higher up offered. WindClan's moorland stretched out, bordered by snow-capped lands that sprouted a few trees here and there-- RiverClan's territory.
As they approached the Mothermouth, Sootstorm slowed to a stop and beckoned Oatpaw forward. "We'll be enterring the tunnel, and I'll be right in front of you the whole time, even if you can't see me. Just call out if you think you're falling behind, kay? Once we're through, you'll see the Moonstone-- a very beautiful stone, by the way. You should stop for a moment to admire it-- and all you have to do is touch your nose to it and sleep. StarClan will meet you in your dreams, and once you're awake I'll be right beside you," he explained briefly what would happen, and once he was confident that Oatpaw had understood, he enterred the tunnel. The darkness was heavy, and he hated to admit it, but his pace might have been a bit more irregular than he would have liked. Once they were finally through, Sootstorm let out a breath of relief and gave the apprentice a comforting smile before taking his place at the side of the cavern while he awaited Oatpaw's dream to end.
OATPAWare you going to age with grace? he/him - windclan apprentice
Oatpaw startled, his eyes and mind bleary with sleep. Sootstorm? He'd been expecting Daisyfang. Moonlight cast a pale glow on the world around him, and Oatpaw yawned as he got to his feet. His paws were heavy with exhaustion, but excitement kept his eyes open and his ears perked. The cold wind hardly bothered him, even coming out of the warmth of sleep. He was going to the Moonstone today! Before he knew it, he'd be a warrior!
He sighed, lapping up the bitter leaves. He'd only taken herbs once before, when he was ill only a couple of moons prior. He still hadn't forgotten the taste. But Oatpaw wasn't going to complain - not when he was so close to earning his name, and certainly not in front of his deputy! He followed behind the older tom, trying not to stumble in his sleepiness.
The journey to the Moonstone was peaceful and quiet. He was almost glad it was so late at night. Even the prey was tucked down, warm inside their burrows. He couldn't catch a single stray scent of rabbit or bird. Nothing was out this time of night except for him and the stray owl. As they approached the cave, he felt a mix of excitement and apprehension wash over him.
They finally entered the cave, Oatpaw's ears pricked instinctively for the sound of any threat. It was almost pitch black down here - the darkness swallow them almost as soon as they passed the entrance. He stayed close behind Sootstorm, following his familiar scent and the soft sound of his pawsteps against the stone. His fur brushed the sides of the cavern, and he tried his best to take steady, even breaths. He'd never been in a cave before, and it was dark and narrow down here. Such a far cry from WindClan's open moors. I won't panic. He'd be okay. Countless of cats had made this journey before, and he was here with Sootstorm, anyway. What could happen?
Before he knew it, they made it through, and Oatpaw let out a soft gasp. It was beautiful. He stopped for a moment, admiring the way the stone glimmered in the moonlight, catching the silver glow and casting a brilliant, shimmering mirage of crystals and dewdrops on the cavern floor. His eyes lit with awe. It was almost as if a strange force beckoned him forward, guiding his paws toward the stone. He turned toward Sootstorm one last time, grateful for the tom's reassuring presence, and turned back to the stone.
Here goes. Oatpaw leaned forward tentatively, his whiskers twitching with curiosity. He winced as his nose finally touched the stone, the cold shocking him to his paws. A heavy slumber fell over him, and he sank to the ground, giving in to sleep.
Being a leader meant there was very little time for rest, even in the stars. Her abnormally long lifetime and wealth of experience made her very often chosen by the ancestors to speak to apprentices, but Ashstar did not mind. It was a nice change of pace from her slow days with Icestorm and Lightfoot and her many kits and grandkits. So she did not begrudge the chance to speak to the living. In fact, given her time as a mother and as practically the mother figure for her entire Clan, she enjoyed the chance to give advice.
In the starry mirror of WindClan's territory, a balmy sunny temperature covering the windswept moors, a tall figure awaited Oatpaw's awakening. Her fur was long and blue-gray, inlaid with glittering stars, and her twinkling eyes the green color of newleaf. "Hello, Oatpaw," she said kindly when their eyes met. "I'm Ashstar. A long time ago, before anyone you know was alive, I ruled WindClan as its leader. I've fought against the Dark Forest, survived attacks from rogues and enemy Clans, and mentored many apprentices. But despite all that... I'm a cat, just like you." Ashstar's long, fluffy gray tail swept over her paws. "I hope you don't feel too uncomfortable. What would you like to speak about?"
OATPAWare you going to age with grace? he/him - windclan apprentice
Oatpaw blinked his eyes open, finding himself standing in the middle of a starry moor. Long grass brushed his pelt as a gentle breeze blew across the land. He basked for a moment in the warmth. It was delightfully warm here, a stark contrast to the howling winds he had left behind mere seconds ago. The sun shone pleasantly on his fur, and he closed his eyes again for only a moment, feeling all his anxiety and tension melt away under the idyllic sunshine and clear blue skies.
When he opened his eyes again, he was almost startled to see a lanky, long-furred blue molly standing in front of him. Her emerald eyes gleamed with love and affection. The last of his worries escaped him. He felt...safe. For maybe the first time in his life, he was entirely at peace. Content. He shook his head as she introduced herself. "I'm not uncomfortable. The opposite, really." Oatpaw smiled softly. Warmth and wisdom radiated from her gaze. From the whole land, really. He could hear the distant, light-hearted cheers and warm chatter from the other StarClan cats on the wind, but when he turned to look, nobody was there. It was just him and Ashstar. Still - the presence of his ancestors surrounded him, enveloping him in a shroud of safety and love.
Her question made his paws prick uncomfortably, though. What would he like to speak about? It came to him in an instant, but the mere thought brought a heavy feeling over him. Oatpaw looked down, breaking from her gaze, and studied the ground beneath him. It was so pitiful. So stupid. Could he really confess how he felt to a leader? He couldn't tell it to any living cat, that was for sure - not even Quickfrost. But part of him trusted Ashstar. Her gaze never left his, her eyes soft and understanding. If there was ever anyone he could tell...it was her.
He took a deep breath, then looked up, meeting her gaze once more. "I'm - I think I'm scared." Oatpaw finally admitted, his pelt burning with shame. His head dipped subconsciously, and it took everything he had to keep his eyes on hers. He felt himself shrink, and he wished he could disappear. "I'm scared to be a warrior. I don't... I don't think I have what it takes." He confessed, his voice hoarse and quiet. His ears twitched with irritation, as though even the thought of feeling like this made him furious with himself.
Ashstar listened carefully, her tall ears pointed forward to take everything in. She could sense his hesitance, his worries. Baring one's soul was a hard thing to ask. But maybe, with the power of the stars around him, and the lack of pressure from a cat he already knew... maybe this would be a good time for him to admit it. And then finally, he did. Voice breaking, but he did. He looks just like Mottleheart. Her adopted son, who had been traumatized from war at a young age, who had become the medicine cat. But he had been one of the best members of the Clan, with a strong heart, and he'd saved her life multiple times. Ashstar smiled at Oatpaw, tilting her head slightly. "The courage to admit one's fears is a strong kind of bravery, indeed," she meowed. "Thank you for telling me. Don't worry--I won't tell anyone else."
Carefully she considered the apprentice, noting the guilt and shame that rolled off of him in waves. "There's nothing wrong with being scared," she told him firmly, but kindly. "Don't be ashamed. Everyone gets scared sometimes. That's our way of assessing threats. The moment of fear, the awakening of nightmares... these are common experiences. Even I had to deal with fear, as a leader. Fear on behalf of my Clanmates. Fear for myself." After the Dark Forest, some part of her had always quailed away from the nighttime. And after so many Clanmates losing faith in her after RiverClan attacked their camp... she'd worried, every time she looked at them, that they would abandon her too. Ashstar shook her head. "The important thing isn't to not feel scared. The important thing is to be able to push through it. To recognize the feeling, and acknowledge it, but not let it stop you from doing what you want. Does that make any sense?" She hadn't been able to help Mottleheart as much as she should have, with all the duties that kept her busy... but maybe now, as a StarClan cat, she could help Oatpaw and others like him. Her gaze was patient as it rested on him, not demanding anything but waiting in comfortable silence for a response.
OATPAWare you going to age with grace? he/him - windclan apprentice
Oatpaw took a deep breath, listening to Ashstar's kind words. It was reassuring. He'd never had a mother, or even a motherly figure to rely on. There had never been anybody to offer him a wise word or a shoulder to cry into. It was starting to dawn on him how alone he was in his own Clan sometimes. He tried to steady himself, doing his best to calm his heavy heart. She's right. Her soft, firm words found their way into his heart. He nodded, taking another shaky breath.
"Everyone... gets scared?" Oatpaw asked, his eyes widening. "Like... even Tigerstar and Sootstorm? But they're so brave..." The two strong toms had always been a pillar of strength in WindClan - he didn't think they were afraid of anything. They'd even taken on the wolves without a second thought. But here was an old WindClan leader - an ancient WindClan leader, as far as he was concerned - and she was telling him that she'd been scared, and maybe even still was, sometimes. He blinked in surprise. "You, too? But you're so - so strong and wise. What could you have to be afraid of?"
He grappled with himself for a moment, with everything he'd ever thought he knew, coming to terms with a hard truth. Was everybody scared? All of the cats in the Clans, and even outside of them? Ashstar was making a lot of sense. If she was saying it, it must be true. He trusted her. He trusted StarClan. Oatpaw's heart began to beat faster. He was sure he would be pulled out of his dream soon. But he had so much to ask her, so much to learn - and she had so much she could share with him. He almost wanted to stay here forever, in these serene grounds, the moors forever golden and skies forever blue. But he knew he couldn't. He'd likely never be back here - not as long as his heart was still beating, anyway. He met Ashstar's gaze once more. No sense in wasting time.
"It does. It actually makes a lot of sense," He noted, surprised. "I...is that courage, then? I always thought the warriors just weren't scared. Not that they were pushing through it, putting on a brave face." He mused, his ears twitching thoughtfully. The young apprentice had always felt beyond his years, and now here he was, learning that he didn't know as much as thought he had. His nervous cedar gaze searched his paws for a second before he straightened up. "How do I push through it? I don't - sometimes it feels like my paws are rooted to the ground." Oatpaw admitted, trying his best not shy away from her patient gaze. He wouldn't be embarassed - he refused.
In the starry semblance of WindClan territory, the breeze around the pair of cats began to grow stronger, ruffling their fur, pulling at Oatpaw. A sign that their time was nearly up. A request for Ashstar to hurry up. If there was one thing that WindClan did well... it was speed. And yet she found herself wanting to linger, to speak more. Why did these visits have to be so short? It tore at her, a little bit. But she had little choice. Oatpaw needed her. And... it was nice to be needed again.
Ashstar nodded, smiling at his wonder. For her to have been so long forgotten, she supposed that her many breakdowns and worries had been buried in the dust as well--so it might seem hard to believe. "I got scared plenty. There were a lot of trials I faced in my life... a lot of cats I loved who died in front of me or were injured. Even some supernatural things like the incarnations of the Dark Forest trying to take over my Clan. I don't have time to get into it, but life in the Clans has always been difficult, and my time was no exception." She appreciated that he was fighting through the shame, doing his best to express his feelings. It was difficult to do, she knew, but he was trying anyway. It warmed her heart. "I know exactly the feeling you're describing. When your heart is racing, your blood is hot, but you feel frozen in place. It's not fun, and it's hard, but... it's possible to find a way around it."
The breeze blew a little stronger, causing ripples in her starry gray fur. Ashstar did not speed up her words, but enunciated them clearly so that he could understand. "Everyone has a different way of facing their fears. You will have to see what works for you, but... I'll tell you what I do. What I do is I envision the faces of those I care for. My son, my grandkits, my Clanmates and friends." She could almost see them now if she blinked. Smokepelt and Mottleheart, Quailfeather and Brindlestar, Lightfoot and Wolftrot and Blizzardshine. None of them were here with her in this moment, though. Oatpaw was. So she met his eyes, the wise light green surveying him one last time. "I see their faces in my mind. And then, I use that to push forward. I run as if... I'm running to them. And if it's for them, I can face any foe. I can face the Dark Forest again. I can face a thousand shadows if it means protecting those that I care for... the Clan that I care for. WindClan, our home." Her tail waved behind her. "For you, the thing that gives you strength might be different. But if you can find it and just hold onto it with all of your might, then you can find the courage to push through your fears. I believe in you."
Almost howling now, pulling at Ashstar, the wind only grew. Before it became too much, she strode quickly forward and touched her nose to Oatpaw's. An action she'd done uncountable times with former apprentices and warriors. A gesture of trust. A blessing, a benediction. Then she pulled back and gave him one last smile. "You'll do well, Oatpaw. I can't come see you every time I want, but whenever things get hard, just know I'm watching over you. WindClan is the closest to the stars, after all. So don't forget what we talked about, all right?" Green eyes twinkled, meeting Oatpaw's gaze again before the wind became too strong and whisked the both of them away, allowing darkness to encroach in and end the dream.
OATPAWare you going to age with grace? he/him - windclan apprentice
Oatpaw gasped as the wind threatened to sweep him off his feet, almost drowning out Ashstar's words. His fur blew in all different directions, and he squinted his eyes against the violent gust. Did he have to leave so soon? He'd only just gotten here. Already were his worries eased, his biggest fears soothed. A great leader, scared. All this time he thought he'd been a big old coward - and come to find out, everyone had only been hiding their fear.
"The Dark Forest?" Oatpaw gasped, realizing just how much she must've been through in her time. The Dark Forest was something he'd only heard about in nursery tales. They were bad cats - truly evil. He didn't think they could ever step into the living world. His heart raced as she went on. He felt like their time was being cut short - would he have time to hear all she had to say? Here she was saying there was a way around it. He wasn't a lost cause. But he needed to hear everything she had to say, he had to stay and soak up all the knowledge she had to give.
"Picturing those you care for... that's smart." He meowed thoughtfully, picturing the faces of his Clanmates, his friends and companions. Maybe he didn't have kin in the Clan, but WindClan was his family, and that was enough for him. Oatpaw felt as though he could take on a family of badgers if it was for the sake of his Clan. He nodded, feeling a rare rush of bravery come over him, his paws burning with sudden strength. "Thank you, Ashstar. I won't forget, I promise."Oatpaw's gaze sharpened with determination. He felt back to his old self now - with Ashstar and the rest of StarClan watching over him, surely things would be okay. "I'll find what gives me strength. I think I'm ready now... I can never thank you enough for your kind words." He dipped his head, his gaze warm with sincerity and a gentle smile on his maw. He pressed his nose back against hers, feeling a wave of affection and strength wash over him, a feeling that everything would turn out alright in the end.
And then she began to fade. Her starry pelt began to fade to black, her emerald gaze twinkling as they gave way to nothing. Oatpaw fought the urge to call out as the wind began to whisk Ashstar away. Come back! He wanted to shout, the words dying in his throat as the world around him faded to darkness. He blinked his eyes open and found himself in front of the Moonstone. The moon had shifted, now - the stone no longer casting that brilliant light around the cavern. How long was I asleep for? Oatpaw took a deep breath, closing his eyes again as he tried to hold on to the memory of his dream. If he focused hard enough, he could still feel Ashstar's nose pressed to his. He looked through the small opening in the cavern ceiling to the sky, smiling softly at the stars. He could swear one shone brighter than the rest.
