The future's in your paws. Shape it well.Roleplay in a cat Clan of warriors. Based off the Warriors series by Erin Hunter. Takes place in an AU before the cats in the books existed.
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It felt good to finally be back home. Moons had passed since they'd originally left their territory around the forest, but Hemlockfox still remembered every path, tree, and pebble. He knew this land like the back of his paw, but that didn't mean he knew where to find the best herbs. Becoming a medicine cat in the territories around the lake was all well and good, but that meant that he hadn't been taught anything about where Skyclan's herb patches were.
Of course, it mostly came down to common sense. Herbs like mallow, feverfew, and marigold tended to grow in wet areas, so off to the creek he went in the hopes of replenishing Skyclan's supply. Their sudden departure from the lake meant that the herb stores were pretty empty, and he would rather swallow thorns than leave his kin without a plentiful amount of medicine. It was bad enough that he had to leave at all, he could at least do one last favor for them.
Speaking of, there was one thing in particular Hemlockfox knew he needed to do. Talk to Thymelight. She was soft. Maybe too soft. However, somebody needed to take his place in keeping an eye on things around here - someone he would see often who could keep him updated. He didn't enjoy it, but Thymelight was the best option. His sisters were fond of her, though, he couldn't fathom why. Soft spoken and gentle, she was a weak link in Skyclan, but the best shot he had at keeping tabs on his family.
Which was why he'd asked her to accompany him today. Her hesitance hadn't gone unnoticed, but he couldn't exactly blame her for that. He'd never been particularly kind to her, but it wasn't as if he'd been a bully either! He'd helped her fight off a fox that one time and had even...well...that was it actually. The tom snorted, glanced at his companion, and rolled his eyes. Whatever. Who could blame him for disliking the cat who was replacing him? The one who had been trying to undermine and steal everything from him since the beginning?
With a sigh, the brown and white tom turned his head slightly in his denmate's direction. He should probably ease into things with her, but he couldn't bring himself to waste precious time. "I don't like asking for favors, but can you do something for me?" He meowed after a moment, voice gruff. "I'm..." He paused, lashed his tail once, and dug his claws into the icy soil. What was he thinking asking Thymelight for help? What did he intend to do? Confide in her that he was being sent away? Beg for her to keep everyone safe? He turned away; gaze fixed on a distant tree. "Nevermind. You wouldn't be able to help - forget it."
Subject: Re: I Don't Know Why I Bite [C] Sat 3 Feb 2024 - 16:10
002
All Hail SkyClan's Resident Disney Princess
thymelight
No matter how your heart is grieving, if you keep on believing.
There was something amiss. Thymelight was always willing to assist a Clanmate, but Hemlockfox had never been the type of cat to ask for her company in particular. She had spent most of the time in silence as they had padded toward the creek, and she kept her eyes peeled for herbs, but she never dared to look Hemlockfox in the eye. He was both predictable and unpredictable. Predictable in the sense that he consistently never had a kind word for her, and unpredictable in the sense that Thymelight never knew if he was going to snap or not. Therefore, as usual, she avoided conflict and stayed as passive as possible.
Truth be told, she was also uncomfortable around him because Hemlockfox made Thymelight feel an emotion that she had never felt before: irritation. It bothered her that she was irritated with a Clanmate. She wanted to desperately to love all of them conditionally, but sometimes the tom made it rather difficult. She couldn’t think of anything that she had done to the tom to deserve such a cheeky attitude. She loved his sisters with her entire heart, and she was always looking for chances to prove herself to the Clan. She had never said a bitter word to her denmate, but he had held something negative in his heart toward her ever since they had been kits in front of the nursery.
Her ears stood up straight once Hemlockfox spoke, and she blinked in confusion. Was he trying to taunt her? Let her know that he thought she incapable of doing anything? Or was it something genuine? She sighed in concern, “Wait, what? I can probably help you if you just tell me…” She trailed off toward the end, not quite sure what else to say. Thymelight wasn’t interested in giving him an encouraging speech in fear of injuring his pride, and she didn’t intend on begging in fear of pushing his patience to the limit.
She stared down at her paws for a moment before shaking her head.
“Hemlockfox, why am I here? You could’ve made me feel bad back at camp if that was the only goal.”
Oh, stars. What had possessed her to say such a thing? She felt a rush of remorse flood her veins, and her eyes were immediately glittering with worry. She hadn’t meant it… right?
A short scoff escaped Hemlockfox's throat before he could suppress it, and rather than apologize, he simply continued scanning the undergrowth, his pelt prickling with discomfort and annoyance. Her? Help? It was inane enough for the traitorous thoughts to worm into his brain, but to hear her say it out loud truly made the tom realize how preposterous the idea was. No matter, he would just pretend this was supposed to be a simple trip for herbs and ignore the whole mess altogether. With any luck, he'd even be able to shake Thymelight off of his tail and she'd be left none the wiser to the maelstrom of thoughts whirling just beneath the surface.
She continued and Hemlockfox was determined to dismiss whatever artificial concerns she had, but, oh wow. Was she really getting an attitude with him? Head snapping in her direction, the tom fixed an icy glare on his fellow medicine cat. What did she mean by that? Did she think that his world revolved around her - around picking on her? Because if so, she was in for a rude awakening. Besides, he realized with a start, anything he had said or done had been justified!
Thymelight paraded around, acting like a perfect little gift from Starclan, and did little other than ruin his life. If she thought that she didn't deserve every ounce of his ire, she was sorely mistaken. Everything had been perfect before she came into the picture. Slowly, his sisters began to gravitate towards her - she'd somehow even managed to finesse her way into his extended family's hearts! And then, as if that wasn't enough, she was replacing him! Him! He was being sent away to Windclan, never to share a den with his kin again, what did she have to complain about? One cat disliking her? He dug his claws into the frozen soil. Poor thing.
The longer he stewed in silence, the angrier he became. Finally, Hemlockfox opened his jaws, his words a snarl. "Oh please. Spare me." What a waste of time. "Everyone absolutely adores you Thymelight. I think you can handle it if I don't. Because contrary to what you may believe, I don't owe you anything." Each word was laced with venom - his distain clear. "You've done nothing but undermine me and Skyclan since you got here, forgive me if I'm not keen on sparing your feelings" He hissed impatiently. Lying - Thymelight seemed to be a master of it when it came to him at least. That sugary sweetness, the sheer lack of a backbone? It would get Skyclan into trouble someday, he just knew it.
Subject: Re: I Don't Know Why I Bite [C] Sat 3 Feb 2024 - 23:21
002
All Hail SkyClan's Resident Disney Princess
thymelight
No matter how your heart is grieving, if you keep on believing.
What was this heat that was spreading throughout Thymelight's pelt? Why was her jaw clenched, and why did she feel as if her paws were stuck to the ground? This emotion... she knew very well what it was, but she had never reached this point with any cat, SkyClan or not, before.
Anger.
His words seemed to rip through her flesh like the claws from the large creatures that had ran them out of their makeshift camps near the lake. His tone was sharp enough to impale her, but her feeling of sadness was overtaken by a sudden burst of outrage. There was a fire in her eyes that had never once burned before, but something had finally kindled it today. Her maw hung open for a moment before words started to flow out of her like a waterfall, and when her brain finally caught up to her mouth, it was far too late to take back anything. "What in StarClan's name is your problem?" She asked, her voice rising above the soft, kind timbre that she had become known for. "When have I ever undermined you or SkyClan? I've tried my hardest for moons to build a foundation for myself in this Clan so I can feel like I belong here. I have worked effortlessly to help, I was ecstatic when I found out that I'd have the chance to be a medicine cat because that meant that I'd be able to be valuable to the Clan in my own way. I love SkyClan. I've loved SkyClan ever since I was taken in before I could form a sentence, I've loved SkyClan ever since I talked to your sisters for the first time. I've been insecure about my contributions for the longest time, but I'm not going to let you make me feel any worse." Her voice was strained, and the fury was now combined with some sort of pain. Her heart slammed violently against her ribcage as she paused.
She felt horrible. Being this upset was making the she-cat feel physically ill, but she had crossed a line that she couldn't uncross, and there was no point in backtracking. She had to continue with the truth, the whole truth that she had kept bottled up for moons. "I've never done anything to you, Hemlockfox. I don't hate you the way that you hate me. I leave you alone because I know you don't like me, and I have no interest in disturbing you, and you still think that I'm some sort of villain. I remember the day that you interrogated me when we were kits. I answered all of your questions honestly because I understood cats being wary of me when I first arrived. That's fine. That's understandable. I don't know what you're afraid of, but you need to face whatever it is because I'm tired of it. Cats are still sick and hurt, and worrying about that is exhausting enough. I don't need this too." Her yellow eyes were wide with exasperation and disbelief as she spoke. Thymelight had tried to not take anything that Hemlockfox said to her personally, because she was fully aware of her background and how some cats felt about outsiders, but she had reached a breaking point. The words that Smokepetal had told her at her medicine cat ceremony swam around in her mind. She was a SkyClan cat through and through, and nothing could take that from her anymore, not even her denmate's unreciprocated acts of distate.
The remorse was settling in again. Snapping was not a tactic that she used to get her point across. She enjoyed the power of a peaceful conversation, but it was difficult when the other cat wasn't interested in the same ideas. Hemlockfox was just... mean. That was it. She had spent moons justifying his actions in her mind and using her desire to see the best in everyone to redeem him, but she had finally come to realize that some cats were just rude. Some cats needed to be spoken to in a different way, but Thymelight was unsure if she'd ever be able to muster up the courage to do such a thing ever again.
Hemlockfox stared expectantly at Thymelight for a moment before sniffing disapprovingly and turning away. Figures that she wouldn't be able to defend herself. He'd been hoping that she would put up somewhat of a fight, to make things interesting at least, but she was apparently too much of a spineless worm for even that. She had no problem with uprooting his entire life, with making Starclan choose her over him, but a confrontation was where she drew the line.
Growling under his breath, the seal-point medicine cat spun around to continue without Thymelight. Let her go back to the camp and sulk, what did he care if he'd hurt her feelings. Then, finally, Thymelight spoke, her words coming so fast that they almost melded together. Grinning dangerously, Hemlockfox glanced over his shoulder at the she-cat, his claws flexing into the soil as she spoke. He held back a bought of laughter at her pathetic attends at justifying herself, but the amusement quickly vanished as she went on. What good was her being a medicine cat if she was such a strong sympathizer to the other clans?
They were on the brink of war with two of their former allies and the only thing she could offer was tender loving care for her clanmates. A snarl worked its way up his throat, but he fought against it, determined not to lose his head. She truly was blind if she couldn't see that a cat who wouldn't do anything for their clan was useless. He would kill every last cat in Riverclan and Thunderclan if it meant keeping his clanmates safe - but he knew she wouldn't do the same. Thymelight was soft-hearted in the worst ways, and she'd tainted his sisters with it.
Despite swearing to never to harm to another cat, Hemlockfox knew that such things weren't always possible. Life could change in a moment and, with his days in Skyclan numbered, he didn't feel comfortable leaving the care of everyone he cared about to Thymelight. He was, however, ready to let her outburst go...that is...until she turned her sharp words to him - blaming him for everything and claiming innocence in it all. Suddenly, a fire was lit within the tom. She had never done anything to him? She didn't hate him? Then why was she the one who got to stay while he left!? Why was she always trying to squirm her way into his family? So she could replace him?
Growling deep in his chest, Hemlockfox stalked close to the smaller she-cat, his blue eyes ablaze with fury. He had been nice, before, to spare her the direct force of his ire, but she'd crossed a line. "You are not strong enough to protect Skyclan. You like the other clans too much and I know you care for our home, but it will get us into trouble someday! I don't care one bit about you being an outsider - I really don't, and I can put your passivity behind me if it weren't for the way you constantly try to steal my family from me!" He hissed, tail lashing.
"I get it, your family is gone, but that doesn't mean you have any right to my place in mine! It's bad enough that you're Starclan's little golden child, at least let me enjoy being with my family while I can." The boiling hot anger beneath his pelt was all consuming and ate away at each one of Hemlockfox's nerves until it felt like his entire body was on fire. He'd always been good at containing his temper, but now that he was letting it out, he couldn't stop himself. Not even if it meant revealing secrets he'd only shared with one cat.
"So quit acting like I'm the villain here! I don't know how or why you did it, but Starclan is sending me away because of you! I have to leave and be a medicine cat in Windclan while you get to stay here and have everything you've ever wanted! I have to leave my family, my home, because, apparently, Starclan thinks you're a better fit for Skyclan!" The tom panted slightly, only now realizing how close he'd gotten to the she-cat and backed away.
"And, hah, to be totally honest, I'm terrified of what will happen to Skyclan without me here to keep everyone safe. I don't trust you to protect them - my sisters. So there. That's why I hate you, happy?" Despite the vulnerability behind his words, Hemlockfox's voice was anything but gentle. Each word came out laced with poison meant to cut deep. It didn't matter if he hurt her stupid feelings, though. His feelings were hurt too, and nobody ever noticed or cared.
Subject: Re: I Don't Know Why I Bite [C] Fri 9 Feb 2024 - 18:30
002
All Hail SkyClan's Resident Disney Princess
thymelight
No matter how your heart is grieving, if you keep on believing.
Thymelight was frozen with disbelief. All of these allegations and accusations were being tossed at her and not a single one of them were true. She stayed still and lifted her yellow gaze to look Hemlockfox in the eye even as he brought himself closer to her. He didn’t scare her in the way that his father, Sunfire, did. Her expression was unmoving… at least until the tom mentioned his eventual departure from SkyClan. The she-cat was consumed by confusion at first. That was impossible, right? Clan culture placed such an emphasis on loyalty to one’s home, so how was StarClan allowed to play swap meet with the cats that lived below? Hemlockfox didn’t appear to be the kind of cat to joke about something so serious and life-altering, and so Thymelight believed him, but she was still puzzled. He spoke to her as if she knew about this plan all along, as if she had spoken to StarClan herself and told them to send her denmate away forever.
And yet, even though he had spent so much time belittling her, Thymelight felt nothing but sympathy. She had witnessed such a story before. She had lived it herself. She had left her family and her home behind to be a part of somewhere new, but it had been easier for her since she was only a kit when her mother had dropped her off on SkyClan’s territory. Hemlockfox had been born and raised here. SkyClan had been the majority of his life, and now StarClan was asking him to leave it behind as if it was nothing. The she-cat’s shoulders fell. Her opinion of StarClan was already a bit more sideways than it should be, but they just kept presenting her with reasons to question them. Between witnessing her Clanmates return home from a Gathering with scars from lightning strikes sent down from above during a Gathering to this fiasco, Thymelight wasn’t sure if it was a smart idea to blindly follow every word of the ancestors. However, there was more to this situation than that.
Hemlockfox was just as insecure as anyone else in the forest was, and he was taking it out on her. Thymelight had always known that the forest raised cats to put claws before feelings and bottle everything up deep inside. It made even more sense considering who the tom’s father was, but even so, the she-cat didn’t want to be the subject of his vitriol. Even though she still felt empathetic, she was still angry. She wasn’t quite sure if the majority of her frustration was targeted at Hemlockfox or at StarClan time, but something was there nonetheless.
“Why are you directing all of this at me as if I’m the one that told you that you need to leave for WindClan?” She asked, frowning slightly. Her voice was quieter now. “How or why I did it? I didn’t even do anything! I didn’t know of this until today, Hemlockfox, and I don’t expect you to believe me, but it’s true. Bloodshed is no longer my job anymore. You’re a medicine cat too, you heard the oath that we took when we received our full names. It’s different from that of a warrior’s. I protect SkyClan now with herbs, not claws, and it may seem silly to you because I know that you’d rather be a warrior than a medicine cat, but I enjoy this new role that I’ve been placed in.”
She shook her head shamefully. There were times that she would hold her tongue in fear of offending Hemlockfox, or in fear of having him think that she pitied him, but it was the truth. She did pity him. “I understand that you care for your family above all else and that’s why you’re filled with anger. This choice that StarClan has made… it doesn’t make much sense to me either, but that doesn’t give you the right to be angry at me. You want someone to blame for all of this to make things easier and I get that, but surely you can’t expect me to just suck it up and take disrespect. I have some dignity. I’m sorry that you have to leave, okay? I can’t even imagine how much pain you must be in, and I feel for you, but you’re being mean to the wrong cats and you need to stop.” Although soft, her tone was still firm. Thymelight was simply exhausted.
“And as far as your family goes… you think I’m trying to steal them? This is ridiculous, Hemlockfox, it’s baseless. I don’t know what else to tell you. I would’ve completely understood if your sisters or the rest of your family wanted nothing to do with me when I joined SkyClan, but they were caring, and they accepted me, and they made me feel like a real member of SkyClan. I’ll always appreciate their kindness as well as the acceptance from the rest of the Clan, and that’s something that will never change. I was a kit when I arrived for StarCla-” she paused, not wanting to mention the name of the ancestors because she was still upset with them, “-er, for goodness sake. I didn’t even know what ulterior motives were at that age! I couldn’t even pronounce SkyClan!"
Hemlockfox narrowed his eyes at Thymelight, the unusual, pitying expression not going unnoticed. What right did she have to look at him like that? Hot anger burned beneath his pelt, and, despite the frosty temperature, he could feel his ears getting warm. Why was she looking at him like that? What could possibly be going on in her head to make her feel sorry for him? This was her fault, wasn't it? Of course it was - maybe she was finally feeling remorse for her actions then?
His tail lashed, the mess of feelings within him clashing and melding into something ugly and bitter. He couldn't name it, but it was something that only Thymelight seemed to know how to draw out of him. Even back when they were kits, something about the way she acted always rubbed him the wrong way. She was too nice, too understanding. Surely, no cat could be as patient as her and not have some sort of ulterior motive, right? Mousedung! It took until he confronted her for her to finally show her true colors! Only...she wasn't even being all that mean, was she?
Whatever, she was purposefully trying to confuse him! He couldn't let her get to him. A growl rumbled in the tom's throat at her words, and he stepped back, lifting his chin to look down at Thymelight. She would try to shift the blame elsewhere, wouldn't she? Who did she want him to be mad at, then, Birdstar? Wolfblossom? His head roiled with emotions, turbulent with the force of his thoughts. She was playing the victim again, trying to turn him against his family now! It was all her fault, it had to be. Until recently, he hadn't even believed in StarClan. How else would he rationalize everything that had happened in the past few moons? This had to be the explanation.
And yet...none of that made sense.
In the past, he thought that she'd stayed silent around him so she wouldn't accidentally slip up, so she wouldn't make him mad. However, if she was snapping now, now that he was confronting her, did that mean that everything from before hadn't been an act? Hemlockfox's ears slicked back against his skull as he stared at the she-cat, conflicted. But Sunfire had told him never to trust outsiders. Of course...Thymelight was hardly an outsider now, was she? She had been living with SkyClan almost as long as he had and may very well end up living here long after he was gone as well. Hah, where was the justice in that? How was any of this fair?
Blue eyes glimmering, Hemlockfox took another step back. He wasn't sure what to say. He hadn't meant for things to go this way, but that offered little comfort. Every single word from Thymelight stabbed deeper into him. He knew very well that his family had welcomed Thymelight with open paws - that was exactly the problem! She hadn't even needed to try! As she got closer and closer to the rest of SkyClan, it seemed as though his bonds grew weaker and weaker. Maybe that's why Starclan was sending him away, because he'd let her replace him.
Yes, that had to be it. Briefly, he wondered if they would change their minds if he removed Thymelight from the situation altogether. If he was truly being punished for sitting idly by while Thymelight made herself into a better version of him...would Starclan let him stay if she was gone? They would have to. SkyClan would need him again. His family would need him again. She was all that stood in his way now - all he needed to do was kill her.
The brutality of the thought startled Hemlockfox for a moment, and his brow furrowed, expression tense. He had considered it once, when they were apprentices...letting that fox kill her. Now, though, the image of her blood on his claws...it disturbed him. Did he really want her dead? Did he really want to murder her? No - he wasn't a killer. At least, he didn't want to be. He just wanted her gone! Why couldn't she go back to wherever she had come from!?
Still, the itch beneath his pelt, the sudden flex of his claws made him question if that was the truth. As much as he hated it, Thymelight was a part of SkyClan, she was his clanmate, he couldn't hurt her. Especially not when his sisters adored her as much as they did. Especially when he had to rely on her once he left to keep them healthy. A strangled hiss escaped Hemlockfox's throat and without so much as muttering another word, he turned and raced deeper into the forest, desperate to get away from not just Thymelight, but the irrational hatred he felt whenever he looked at her.
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