Cry Louder[solo]

Sootstorm had to go somewhere to clear his head. The tom had sent out the patrols for the day, helped Daisypaw with the sick cats, until he just couldn't stand it. He excused himself, then pratically ran out of the make-shift camp. He ran and ran until he was far away enough, the collasped into a panting mess. He couldn't do it. He couldn't spend another moment watching his loved ones fall sick all over again. He didn't want to see their eyes gloss over, the inevitable stillness of their bodies as they took their last breath. He didn't even want to think about it, but everytime he saw Tallshadow's state the memories came back all over again. Ferntwist's still body, still curled around their kits... no, stop it. He screwed his eyes shut, surprised when he felt wetness on his face.

He was crying? Sootstorm wanted to laugh. After all this time, he still missed her. He had so many friends still alive and well now, and yet his thoughts kept going back to her. It wasn't fair to his clanmates, especially after they entrusted him with the role of being their deputy. He should have their best interests in mind, not mourning a cat who died seasons ago. It all felt so cruel, to have to tear himself away from Ferntwist, but he couldn't let his clanmates down. He couldn't let another cat die or disappear, not again.

Sootstorm dried his tears, and calmed down his breathing. He could do this. He had to do this. He had to be enough, even if he didn't think he was. For WindClan, he'd go to the stars and beyond.