Ladybugs & Paper Airplanes [c]

Having tended to the sick and then the elders as part of his warrior duties earlier that morning, he’d made his way to the nursery to check on the queens and it’d hit him like a Monster when he saw that the mink-colored she-cat wasn’t present and accounted for. He couldn’t help but worry about so many things, most of which were worst-case-scenario sort of thoughts. Was she alright, had she gotten into trouble with other clan cats, had Twolegs gotten a hold of her... There were just too many unknowns that kept swirling around his head that he hadn’t felt a moment of peace since her disappearance and with the scent of a storm looming overhead, he decided to take action sooner rather than later. Life without his newly named mate wasn’t a life he wanted to live at all, and not having a second to spare as far as letting others know of the current situation, he’d raced out of camp faster than he ever had before.


"Rosethorn!" Curlyfluff hollered, his voice filled with a sense of urgency and alarm. Rushing through the base of the dimly lit forest with rain pelting against his face, Curlyfluff was on a mission; to find his mate and very soon-to-be mother of their kits.

Jumping up and digging his claws into the bark of a tree, Curlyfluff shimmied up the trunk and onto a branch, just like he had with Rosethorn back in the day. A swift breeze ruffled his fur, forcing him to hold a firm grip as he scanned the surrounding area, though his vision was obstructed by the strong gusts of rain that the wind brought down into the canopy. A sharp clap of thunder sounded in the distance and jumping from one tree to another, he stepped lightly and made every pawstep count.

"Rosethorn!" he called out again, this time from up on an even higher branch in hopes of getting a better view of things down below. Keeping his tuft-covered ears perked and squinted eyes peeled, he glanced around praying that he would get some sort of response, but all he got in reply was howling wind and roars of rain that continued down through the trees.

Having spent a good amount up amongst the leaves, the soaked tom made his way back to the ground. He jumped over every boulder and peeked under every fallen log and stump. He called her name time and time again as he rounded every corner or crawled under every bush. Each time his voice lost a little more energy than the last and his fatigued muscles ached, but he wasn’t going to give up yet. He needed to find her.

Large rain drops splashed onto every stick and leaf and puddles quickly began to form in the earth’s natural divets as he paced quickly around the territory. His eyes stung from the rain and his water-covered fur had grown heavy, but he continued onwards, his heart racing faster than it ever had before.

"Rose… thorn…" he huffed, his voice faltering in desperation and his stride slowing to a halt as he realized that he’d been wandering in circles for who knew how long. His legs had grown heavy and with every breath his lungs strained more than the last. His legs began to quiver and a suffocating lump began to grow in his throat as he was forced to embrace the overwhelming lack of a reply or any-cat’s presence. Alone in the middle of the forest with not a soul in sight; only the sound of thunder and rain to fill his ears.

"Curly! Where are you?"

Hearing a familiar voice in the distance, his heart leapt inside his chest as he stood still, his legs shaking and breathing heavy. Had he imagined her voice? It was faint, but it must have been her. She was nearby, she just had to be!

"Rosethorn! I’m here!" he cried out, snapping his head around every which way. Waiting for a reply he didn’t get one, but he wasn’t about to sit around and wait for her voice again. Picking up his pace once more, he raced across the forest floor, noticing that puddles and streams had begun to form all throughout the territory. ’Oh StarClan, PLEASE let her be alright,’ he prayed to himself as he ran, his pawsteps heavy against the ground.

Skidding to a halt as he almost fell into a ditch near the edge of the forest, Curlyfluff stood horrified at the sight before him. A few fox lengths in front of him laid his mate’s body, the overwhelming scent of blood quickly filling the air around him. He thought he saw her move, but it had only been for a split second and now she laid there motionless. Next to her, squirming around helplessly, were two dark-pelted kits, their tiny, helpless squeals ringing in his ears. Water pooled around them and squinting through the rain he thought he saw more kits, but they weren’t moving. Why weren’t they moving? He needed to get them all out of there, but there was no no time to wonder. Not yet.

"H-hang on, I’m going to get you all to safety," he called out to his mate, though her lack of response or movement made his heart pound even harder. Sliding down the steep slope, he didn’t bother taking a headcount and began grabbing kittens. It only took him two trips back and forth before he slid back down and grabbed Rosethorn’s scruff. "Hold on a little longer," he mumbled through a mouthful of fur, though he didn't know if he was talking to her or himself. Hauling her to the top of the slope and out of harm's way while doing his best not to slip in the mud himself, he gently placed her down next to their kits. The two that were moving made their way over to her belly in search of something to eat, but for a few seconds they seemed confused and reluctant to nurse. The three others that he’d brought up continued to lay unmoving. Prodding each of them gently, the coldness that their pelts held, their stiff bodies, and unmoving chests told him that they were gone and taken to StarClan all too soon.

Taking a breath, he moved his attention to his mate, his eyes wide with fear and ears pinned against his head as his body quivered from the chill of the rain. "R-rosethorn," he mewed softly, prodding her damp side gently with his paw. "Wake up, you need to name your kits. Let’s… let’s go home," Curlyfluff spoke with a smile as he began to choke on his words. Her body continued to stay motionless and the longer he stood there waiting, the more he became sure of the she-cat’s fate.

Tears began to stream down his face and it didn’t take long before his legs buckled underneath him. Falling down and resting his head on Rosethorn’s cold and motionless chest, Curlyfluff laid there weeping; his sobs audible, but only to any-cat who was standing right next to him. He’d tried to stay strong for their sake, but the warrior just couldn’t take it anymore. He’d never felt such hopelessness and his heavy chest felt as if it might sink into the earth below. He was never going to see her again or get to meet their stillborn kits… how could StarClan have allowed this?! Him and his mate had dedicated their entire lives to their clan and the stars above, why had this happened? It just didn’t make sense. He’d heard about her having some sort of heart weakness, but perhaps he’d never grasped the concept as much as he should’ve. Was this his fault? Causing her to give birth when she was already weak, not to mention during such an inconvenient time with famine running rampant through the clans… how could he have been so stupid?

“Why? Why?!” He cried out at the top of his lungs suddenly, his voice being completely drowned out by a crash of thunder from above. Lightning momentarily lit up the sky as rain continued to pour down onto him, making the entire extent of his once lucious pelt stick against his body like a drowned squirrel. He wanted to cry out more, to let the stars and sky above know of the pain and anguish in which he was feeling, but the soft mews underneath him caused him to shut his maw.

Having completely forgotten about the two kits that made it through this whole ordeal, Curlyfluff rubbed his nose with a paw and attempted to sniff up his tears. Looking down, he watched as the two wet bundles of fur squirmed about under his somewhat dry belly, their natural instinct most likely having compelled them to go someplace warm and dry. And just as quickly as the storm had formed, the rain began to cease and the sound of rolling thunder was no longer right over them, but somewhere off in the distance. The sky above stayed dreary and covered in a blanket of clouds, but all that was left in its wake was the soft ‘pitter-patter’ of droplets falling from the leaves to the forest floor.

Continuing to look at their kits, the pain he felt was momentarily masked with joy. Through the blood, mud, and rain that covered their pelts he couldn’t quite tell, but wondered if the first she-kit would have markings similar to her mother. He also noticed that her face was shorter like his own and her expression, though her eyes were still closed, held a sort of warmth that immediately reminded him of Rosethorn. "You’ll be Sweetkit; to carry on the memory of your mother’s kind-hearted and lovable nature," he spoke softly at the kit, knowing fully well that she couldn’t understand him or hear him, for that matter.

The second one, though also covered in debris, looked to be more dark-pelted overall. He laid there wondering what to name the small bundle, when a bird flew by, catching his attention. Landing on a lower branch of a nearby tree, it began to sing its song, signaling to the forest that the storm had passed. In just a few moments, it fluttered away gracefully as if the raging winds and rain hadn’t bothered it at all. Leaning down to the darker pelted kit, he whispered in her ear, "And you’ll be Larkkit; like the free-willed birds that fly above."

Turning back to his mate’s disheveled pelt, he couldn’t hold back the tears that began to stream down his face once more. "I h-hope you like the names. I- I’m so sorry that I wasn’t here s-sooner," he stammered, his head resting on her side. Any ounce of warmth that her pelt once held had completely vanished, leaving nothing more than an empty shell of a body. Hopefully she had safely made her way up to StarClan and had met up with their departed family and friends. Someday, he’d be able to join her and he decided that would be his sliver of hope that he would carry with him for the rest of his days until his time came. "I hope… I hope that even among the stars you’ll be able to watch your kits grow. Someday… we’ll all be together again, I promise."

Closing his eyes as he continued to lay still, his head still resting on her body, sunlight began to peak through the clouds above and he soaked up the small bits of warmth that seeped through the canopy. He knew that the sorrow felt having lost her was the price paid for having her in his life, but he didn't know if he'd ever be able to accept it. Sniffling, he took a moment to quiet his gentle sobs. He wanted her to be able to hear him and didn’t want his last words to be muddled in with his tears. He could cry more later, but right now, he needed to be at least a little strong. Firefly would’ve wanted it too, he just knew it.

"You’ll always live in my heart and I swear that I'll never forget you. I love you so, so much and hope you sleep well."