only by chance [c]

Bearpaw hadn't realized that speaking with Smokepaw had impacted her so much. Memories of the Thunderpath were nowhere near pleasant, but memories of staring out into the marshland certainly were. She had never enjoyed sitting still. In fact, when she and her littermates were kits, she had always looked forward to racing out of the nursery to bask in the sunlight, so why did she feel like running wasn't an option now? She knew the warrior code, and she knew that loyalty to ones Clan was of utmost importance. That was one of the primary reasons why she felt as if SkyClan was suffocating her. There were cats that held resentment in their hearts for her and her siblings for a sin that they had no control over, and Bearpaw was tired of the judgement.

The afternoon was warm and peaceful, and Bearpaw decided to take the opportunity to spend time with the kits in the nursery. No matter how she felt about the Clan, she knew that she would always have a soft spot for kits. Plus, looking busy meant that she wouldn't be placed on tick duty for the day. Her regular smile graced her features as she strolled out of the apprentices' den and gave her fluffy pelt a shake.

As she padded across the camp, she couldn't help but turn her head to notice the figure of one of her half-sisters. She wasn't clueless about Beechface's feelings towards her and her littermates, but Bearpaw was never the type to turn down a conversation.
"Well, if it isn't my favorite medicine cat!" She purred as she skipped over.
"Hiya, Beechface! We haven't talked in forever. What are you up to?"

Beechface stretched, making her way out of the medicine den with a sigh. Sorting herbs, treating injuries... It never ended. How Muddythorn was so enthusiastic was beyond her comprehension, but the clan deserved at least that much. She'd just take a few moments to herself, and then she'd head out to the great ridge to see what she could find. It would give Muddythorn a chance to test his knowledge, and maybe this time they wouldn't be interrupted by clanmates being injured.

Yellow-green eyes narrowed as Bearpaw's chipper voice caught her ears, and Beechface gave the apprentice a disbelieving stare. Of course, she should have known any attempt at a moment alone would be interrupted.

"Only medicine cat. You don't need to call me your favorite." She commented dryly. Muddythorn was an apprentice still, though Beechface hoped she could get him through his training sooner rather than later. Then maybe Wolfstar would take pity on Skyclan and let return to what Sagelight had robbed her of.

The apprentice wasn't technically wrong, she and Bearpaw hadn't talked in... ever. Beechface went out of her way to avoid Bloodstrike's mistakes whenever she could, but it seemed like today wasn't her day. Why the apprentice was trying to pretend they were closer than they were, Beechface had no idea.

"I finally take a break from sorting herbs, of course someone wants to talk." She huffed, one ear twitching, "I should be asking you the same thing. Ashstorm letting you off the hook for the day?" See? Beechface could be civil. It didn't mean she wanted anything to do with these supposed new family members, but she could be civil for the sake of the clan.

"Aw, c'mon, don't be like that. I was just trying to give you a compliment." Bearpaw shrugged, her smile unwavering.

How could a cat possibly be so grumpy all the time? Bearpaw didn't expect anyone to constantly be happy, but she had never seen her half sister smile, not even once. It must've been a miserable life to live. That was when she perked her ears as a new idea hit her.

She was going to make Beechface smile.

Every cat enjoyed compliments, right? Surely it wouldn't take too long to put at least the smallest of grins on the medicine cat's face. The apprentice sat down, studying the she-cat in front of her for a moment before speaking again.
"Yeah. I think Ashstorm is out on a patrol today so she's letting me stay here. I love training, but it's nice to get a break every now and then."

She tilted her head slightly to the side as she planned out her next words carefully.
"Y'know, Beechface, I just admire you so much!" Bearpaw began, her eyes widening innocently.
"You do so much for SkyClan and you don't get enough credit. I can't imagine having to memorize all those herbs when I can't even memorize who cats are sometimes. Like, I thought your name was Leechface for an entire moon when I was a kit... but, um, that's aside from the point. What I meant to say is, cats around here should really be thanking you more. You work too hard."

"I do miss training... I'm sure Ashstorm is a great mentor." She had her differences with Ashstorm, but she was a skilled warrior and her apprentices always spoke well of her.

Bearpaw's words pulled her from her thoughts, and Beechface shifted uncomfortably at the sudden shift in her tone. Her eyes had widened innocently... Almost too innocently for the words coming out of her mouth. Especially words directed at Beechface, who had always made her feelings known. Bearpaw had no reason to admire or look up to her, or even like her. She'd be well within her rights to despise her, in fact, and the feigned compliments didn't sit well with the grumpy medicine cat.

Leechface.

There it was, the insults she had expected from the start. The medicine cat let out a snort, though her lack of amusement remained plastered across her expression. She took a breath, then exhaled. Leech? As far as she was concerned, the only leeches in the clan were her father's so-called 'mate' and their half-clan mistakes... And Sunflower, though he at least was too terrified of his own shadow to think of being disloyal in such a way. These half-siblings weren't real Skyclan, and the way Beechface saw it, there was nothing preventing their mother from turning against the clan with the shift in the winds. She'd done it to her former clan, hadn't she? Why shouldn't their kits, who clearly didn't like or appreciate Skyclan and who insisted on bothering her for no reason, be any different?

Her lip curled in disgust. "Leech? Maybe you should look inward, kitten." She sneered, "You're right, I do work hard, treating the sick, the wounded, cleaning up after people's messes-" Her tone left little doubt that the mess she was referring to was Bearpaw and her siblings, though the only one she had any logical right to be angry with was her father and that filthy Shadowclanner. She was too angry to care, and if Bearpaw insisted on insulting her, Beechface could be just as insulting right back. "-and I get to deal with petty nonsense from entitled apprentices as thanks." She bit out.