[solo] Misery; Destiny

”One Month Ago: The Kimble Home”:

A thick, heavy rain fell over the forest - it had been falling constantly below the moorlands since a few days after Amberdawn left SkyClan, before she had left the nest she’d shared for an evening with the traveler, Patrick. Hunting was becoming more difficult with the changing weather and the tight borders, and the former medicine cat realized at last that the time had come. She was going to have to find help, one way or another. She just wasn’t made to be on her own.

Amberdawn wasn’t sure whether to feel more or less at ease once she’d found her way through the forest and past the fence into Twolegplace. The former medicine cat had succeeded in seeing most of her dearest loved ones before she had to abandon the forest, likely for good, but she had come to realize quite swiftly that she would never be able to see everyone she wanted. To attempt that, she would never be able to sever her ties to the place she’d been born and raised. She could be coerced into staying, she knew; she wasn’t strong enough to say no. That was why she’d had to leave anyways.

Cats who she loved and wanted to see and say goodbye to were far from her reach now; Leaftwirl had kitted at the Gathering and was now certainly confined to camp; Beartooth resided in ThunderClan, and he was much too close to Amberdawn’s birth Clan to risk more visits than she’d already managed with Mossbloom (she prayed her friend would pass the news along); Mothpaw was the sole medicine cat of ShadowClan, and the Clan was in desperate need of her full attention. Amberdawn couldn’t serve another Clan, so if she couldn’t help, she needed to stay out of the way.

Staying out of the way in the forest was difficult, though, with five Clans and a constant shifting of loners and rogues. Twolegplace was safe from that; the Clans despised kittypets, after all. Amberdawn had met one or two, and a few loners too. They had always spoken either indifferently or positively about twolegs. The tabby had hesitations, though; Mossbloom, her dearest friend, was connected to both.

Amberdawn had learned, at Flintfang’s death, that Mossbloom had once been a twoleg’s kit; the creatures had smacked at her and pulled at her savagely and pushed her around until, at last, she’d been abandoned. She was discovered by ThunderClan then. They’d saved her. Her next encounter Amberdawn had been present for: the twoleg on the lake shore. It had brought two dogs with it, and it had also carried some strange stick that was able to shoot rocks faster and fiercer than any roguish claw-swipe. They bruised deep and cracked bone. None of them had known twolegs would hurt a cat in that way, but they found out. Were they all so terrible?

Jerry said no. Amberdawn had met the tom when she was still in her birth Clan. He was glossy-furred, fat, and perfectly content with the life he lived with or without his twolegs. Was it so much to dream that, perhaps, she could be so lucky as to find the same? She vaguely remembered a loner she’d helped once who was traveling to Twolegplace to receive healing… She’d had the same dream. Had it worked?

A flash of light in the sky made Amberdawn jump slightly, fraying her claws for the hundredth time on the coarse pale Thunderpath she was crossing. She was already lost, and entering twolegplace was seeming like a worse and worse idea as the light of day disappeared, shifting into a stormy night. She wandered and wandered, growing weary, but she couldn’t find a place to shelter like the had with Patrick and after seeing Mossbloom; scents of dogs and cats were everywhere, muddled with the muck and grass and strange smells of rubbish and twolegplace. Where was safe? Where was empty? What was claimed or free?

A suddenly roaring sound coming closer made Amberdawn let out a mewl of distress; a monster had turned around a corner and was now rushing towards the soaked golden tabby as she crossed the thunderpath. She felt her heart shoot into her throat as she took a flying leap, the monster screaming just behind her. Her paws had just touched the other side when the monster hit a deep pool of water, sending a wall of murk to slam into the lean cat. She coughed and sputtered, feeling the acrid scent of Thunderpath burning her throat and eyes, as she fled further away.

She scrambled onto a slightly taller piece of ground and in towards a tall stone wall. The landing beneath her paws felt like Thunderpath, but not quite. It was light and pale, and despite the strong scent of human that resided in the dry place beneath the overhang she had now found, Amberdawn couldn’t find the strength to run on anymore. She shivered, and a murmur of sadness escaped her. StarClan, help me; I’m so sorry for leaving my path, but please - don’t leave me alone! Help me find a new way, the former medicine cat asked sadly, glancing up to the sky. The stars were veiled with storm clouds.

A sudden sound made Amberdawn jump; an odd, quiet creaking sound from slightly up the wall beside which she hid. She lifted her head and spotted a small opening filled with light that seemed to have appeared, perhaps opened by the breeze of the storm. The medicine cat was immediately alerted by a scent carried on the same breeze that opened the secret gap into the wall: herbs. Thyme. Parsley... Mint? She stared with amazement at the small opening, and though she still shivered fiercely with cold, she felt her tail-tip twitching. Is this a sign? she wondered, and hesitantly she stood and crossed the gap. A small ledge sat beneath the strange opening, and the SkyClan cat easily made the jump.

What she saw surprised her. Indeed, she had found herbs, and she realized that she had found a twoleg nest, and that was what sheltered her now. She was amazed to see that twolegs kept herbs in small, colorful blocks that held dirt. They looked lovely, and as Amberdawn settled herself into a crouch on the warm, dry, fragrant perch she’d found, she forgot just how much thyme had always soothed her. Without knowing just how tired she was, the she-cat slipped to a peaceful sleep.

The pale golden tabby awoke several hours later, surprised to see that the sun was up over the horizon. Having forgotten momentarily where she’d fallen asleep, Amberdawn lifted her head curiously and gazed into the opening in the side of the twoleg nest. What she saw surprised her more than the fact that she slept until past sunrise. The strange gap was wide open now, the herbs within paw’s reach and the full interior of the den exposed. A thick, tantalizing scent touched her nose. A large, hollow stone sat just past the herbs on a platform, and it was full of something that smelled strongly of meat - well, fish specifically. She’d never been particularly interested in fish, but she’d tolerated it well enough on the lake shore, and her stomach let out a growl that made her sides twinge with discomfort.

Amberdawn waited for a moment, looking up from the food dish with a stiff neck - she’d slept in the same position all night, after all - and was startled to see two twolegs sitting just inside, several fox-lengths away. They seemed to be crouched behind a tall platform, their eyes wide and faces hidden slightly by their large paws. Amberdawn’s heart thumped a little harder, and she glanced down at the food. Did they bring this? she wondered, glancing up at them again.

The twolegs murmured softly to each other. One leaned into the other, shaking, but otherwise they didn’t move closer, and they didn’t take their eyes off the she-cat perched at the opening of their nest. Amberdawn could feel a strange sadness in the air, but also… anticipation. What were they expecting? Could… Could it have been her? The golden tabby stood, feeling her muscles cramp slightly. She kept her dark eyes on them, but she arched her back and stretched up tall on her toes, her tail curling.

One of the creatures made a soft cooing sound, and Amberdawn slowed her movements, looking at them curiously. There was a strange fluttering in her belly at the sound. She looked again with interest at the food, and one of the twolegs made a soft, welcoming clicking noise. The she-cat’s ears twitched again. This… This must be for me. Amberdawn glanced at the herbs just in front of her again. Wait, is this… my sign from StarClan? She turned and her dark amber gaze scanned the clear blue sky. Is this where I’m supposed to be? she wondered, and a gentle breeze blew against her face as if gently nudging her face back towards the nest. She hesitated, then turned to look back into the food again. It was almost stronger smelling now. She thought of what she’d heard Clan cats say about kittypet food; this seemed nothing like it. Gazing in it seemed to be mostly chunks of fishy-looking meat with a little bit of pungent liquid. Where were the dry, tasteless rabbit-droppings she’d been warned about?

A leap of faith - that was what she needed to take. Amberdawn drew in a soft breath, and she looked again at the twolegs. They hadn’t moved, but the excitement radiating off of their bodies was apparent. One of them had begun to tremble, and water made their strange eyes shine. Amberdawn looked towards the food, and she looked for a path towards the odd stone. Between the parsley and thyme was a gap her size, and she lifted one cream paw - though she realized she was caked with dried dirt and mud - and stretched, risking a step inside.

Amberdawn set her foot down, and a soft sound slipped from the twoleg with the wet face. The golden tabby looked at her immediately as she took a second step in. That… sounded like crying, she thought, feeling confused, yet she slipped the rest of the way in and moved slowly towards the bowl.

“Marmalade,” the wet-faced twoleg said, but Amberdawn didn’t understand the word. The second twoleg held the first, and they watched patiently.

The former Clan cat didn’t glance at them again; she was taking the leap of faith. She reached the side of the odd stone and dipped her head in slightly to sniff at the contents, feeling the sides of the hollow object constricting her whiskers a little. She didn’t care for that much, but the contents were quite appealing, especially now that she was so close.

“Sharon… That’s… That’s Marmalade. That’s Dustin’s cat,” the wet-faced one murmured again, insistently, to their companion.

The other shook their head. “What…? Sue, baby, no,” they protested patiently.

The first whispered more intently, “No, I-I know - it’s not the shelter cat, b-but… we were supposed to meet her. I… what if... this is meant to be?”

The second was quiet.

Amberdawn didn’t understand the exchange, though she kept an ear towards their murmurings; she was focused on the strange offering that they had left for her, for the first lick of the surface of the meat pile had been an explosion of flavor. It certainly wasn’t vole, and it tasted nothing like a river fish, but her body recognized the nutrition within it. It held her attention well enough. She crouched beside the bowl, letting out a soft, low sigh as she settled into the food. The twolegs began to edge closer, murmuring softly tot the cat before them - and to each other. The golden tabby didn’t fret; she was already feeling the benefits of the sustenance before her, and the energy in the air was clear.

They’re taking a leap of faith, too, she mused, taking in another small bite before lifting her slender golden head to look at them. They had edged much closer than she’d realized; they could likely reach a paw out and touch her, if they desired. Amberdawn felt the anticipation in the air. They… do want to reach out, she suddenly guessed, and she glanced down at one of their paws with curious eyes. She swallowed and licked her lips, her tail laid flat against the surface.

Slowly, hesitantly, the twoleg with the wet face twitched their paw. One instinct sized Amberdawn’s muscles for an instant - No, you mouse-brain, they’re twolegs! They’ll trap you! They’ll hurt you like they hurt Moss! - but the twoleg immediately froze, and Amberdawn forced herself to not only relax but lean forward, towards the edge of the ledge upon which she sat. The twoleg gasped softly, and the hand rose again. Slowly it moved closer, and Amberdawn felt her heart racing. Have faith, she thought.

The long paw stopped, toes flexed unnaturally far outwards, just a breath before Amberdawn’s face. She could feel the edges of her whiskers electrified by its presence. She took a deep breath...

… and she pressed the slightly rain-crusted top of her head against the strange, fleshy feature.

Hours had passed since the first contact was made. The golden tabby cat had been stroked - a strange sensation, especially with her dirty, matted fur - a number of times as she crouched near the food. The twolegs had made strange sounds to each other and to Amberdawn herself, though she couldn’t imagine what they might be trying to communicate, while she ate and then began to wander. They never made any moves to get between her and the herbs on the ledge or, more importantly, the opening out of the den; she knew, she had tested it a few times. She kept walking up to it and they would stand back patiently, not moving - not breathing. They were waiting for something, and she suspected that it involved her, but whatever it was they didn’t prevent her from going where she wanted.

The golden tabby was confused by the maze of a den as she explored, but wherever she went the twolegs were there to signal the way out and back towards the window again. Amberdawn didn’t understand it, but truly they followed her around like kits - or perhaps queens - the entire time. She climbed underneath large, odd-shaped boulders of all kinds of textures, leapt onto ledges of odd, smooth wood, and more. None of it made sense, yet none of it felt… threatening. It was unfamiliar and intriguing.

I wonder if Leaftwirl would think this was a grand adventure, Amberdawn thought absently, but the thoughts of her friend were tainted with sadness. For better or worse, she was quickly able to distract herself with her new surroundings again. Wherever she went they allowed her, and whenever she wanted back out they showed her the way. She began to feel at ease quickly.

Though it smelled strange, after a while she grew tired. The sun was beginning to set again, she could see through one of the weird shining, clear walls in the wall of the den. She began to feel tired, and safe. For the first time in days she had an almost uncomfortably full belly, sure access to fresh, clean water - though it had a bit of an odd tang to it - and shelter over her head.

She felt… safe. When evening came, Amberdawn settled herself beside an odd opening in the floor that blew steady, warm air from it. It ruffled her fur ever so gently, warming her to the core. She kept an eye on the twolegs, who had slumped down into a strange soft nest-stone of some kind, as she began to slowly, carefully groom herself. Bit by bit the cleaned away the grime, the bitter taste of the Thunderpath, the musky scents of the forest. She cleaned the mud and dirt until her fur began to sparkle, and then she continued to groom. After a while, when she was all clean, she became content simply to lay beside the hot-wind cave.

“Sharon,” Sue said again, softly, “That’s Marmalade. That’s Dustin’s cat.”

Sharon was quiet for a while. Across the room, Amberdawn’s dark amber eyes were flickering shut with pleasure and contentment. “That’s Marmalade,” the twoleg said at last, softly. “That’s Dustin’s cat. That’s… That’s our cat.”

The golden tabby slipped into an easy slumber, and a soft purr began to rumble in her chest. This is my new home.