Brotherly Love and Support

"Nnngh...! N-No... Hnnk--! Poppyheart, NO!"

Asterspark sat up in a blind panic, panting heavily, tears falling down his cheeks that also stained his nest. Oh, great stars above, that one was horrible. He still remembered everything that had happened so vividly in his nightmare: Poppyheart had been stuck under some rubble and debris in Carrionplace, knowing fully well that the place was going to go down in flames at any second, and try as he did, Asterspark couldn't rescue him.

Asterspark hunched over in his sitting position to softly weep for several minutes, struggling not to wake any of his denmates up. Stars, he missed his brother so much! Why didn't he just tell him about Blazeflight being their actual mother in the very beginning? Then none of this would have ever happened. He was such a terrible, terrible brother.

Standing up, the half-blinded tom slipped out of the warriors' den and into the cold night air, the moon up above beginning to wane from its previously full state, not a cloud in the sky, which was strange in itself considering it was leaf-bare. Was that supposed to be some sort of sign? Was Poppyheart not missing, but actually among StarClan's warriors? His eyes watered, more tears streaming down his cheeks, at the thought as he stared up at the moon. Hopefully it was just a coincidence. Hopefully Poppyheart was still alive. Maybe he was looking up at the moon, too, at this very moment. Did he miss his brother, too?

Liontail's ears twitched in his sleep and he opened his eyes, just in time to see a tail slip out the warrior's den, who could be awake at that hour?

The black and white tom then looked over to his brother Asterspark, only to not find him there, that confused the older warrior... until he remembered... what happened in Carrionplace...

"Oh... right... "

Liontail got up, slowly making his way out to find his brother, he was devastated when he found out what happened to Poppyheart, for a while he thought that maybe if he was there, he could be still alive... but blaming himself wouldn´t make him come back to life... and he had to make Asterspark realize that too.

Hearing the rustling and soft padding of another cat behind him, Asterspark whipped around in a startled frenzy, only to find his oldest half-brother standing there. The fur along his back that had fluffed up in alarm lowered again. "O-Oh. Heh, heya, Liontail. Whatcha doin' up so late? You should still by lion in bed gettin' some sleep." He forced that same lazy-looking grin and he offered his brother a wink, though he hadn't had time to wipe his eyes free of tears.

Asterspark chuckled softly, not realizing until it was too late that Liontail was inspecting his face, undoubtedly able to see his tears now. At his question, he flinched and looked away. "...Yeah. But it's not really any big deal, so you don't need to worry about me, big bro. I'll be fine. I just needed some fresh air to clear my head. I'll be going back to sleep in a few, so you can go on back."

Liontail was looking at him, thinking... he wasn´t sure his brother was going to be okay by his own, not now...

"Well to be honest... i´m not so sleepy right now... how about this, we can go and hunt together... and if you need to talk about... anything... i would love to listen to you" he gave Asterspark a reassuring smile.

Asterspark looked up at Liontail in a bit of surprise. Then he smiled softly. "Heh... Thanks, Liontail. I guess it would be nice to get out of camp and stretch my legs a little." Standing back up, he led the way out of camp, and once they were in the depths of ShadowClan territory he slowed down so he could walk side-by-side with Liontail. He looked over at his older brother and mewed, "Hey, I'm just curious, but what was ShadowClan like when you were younger? Was it anythin' like it is now?"

Liontail walked at a relaxed pace, his ears twitched a bit at Asterspark´s question, and the older warrior hummed.

"Well... ShadowClan hasn´t changed in anything, just, our dad was deputy back then, that´s just it" he answered... and frowned.

"And then he became leader" his ears drop "I couldn´t even be there, i was sick... i wish i was there..."

Liontail wasn't exactly the oldest cat in the Clan, but he was still Scorchstar's first out of many kits. If ShadowClan wasn't any different than it was back then...

Asterspark looked over at his older brother when he began expressing his sadness, and he stopped walking to gently nuzzle him, forgetting about his own thoughts for the moment. "Hey, it's okay, Liontail. At least you're here now, right? That's all that matters to him right now."

Liontail couldn´t help to smile softly and purr, nuzzling back at his brother.

"You´re right..." he said, and sighed... "Hey... were you there when dad became leader...? how was it...?"

”Well... I didn’t get to see the ceremony itself ‘cuz it was up in Highstones,” Asterspark responsed, trying to remember the event that had taken place many moons ago. ”He seemed really when he returned the next day, though. Somethin’ about finally escaping his past and feelin’ happier than he had in a long while. I was really proud of ‘im, definitely, and—“

He stopped walking, his gaze shifting to the ground at the distant memory. ”A-And... And P-Poppyheart was proud, too... We were both so proud of him together. We had made a vow, that... that no matter what happened, we would do our very best for our father. That... we would be together... always...” The contrast between moon-silver snow and his dark blue-gray paws began to swim as tears gathered in his eyes. ”I... I’m a horrible brother, Liontail. I was tryin’ to protect him from heartache by not tellin’ him who our real mother was. But I had only made things worse. And now... now he’s gone. And... I-I’m tryin’ t’ hold onto hope, that he’ll come back home one day, but... if he doesn’t... th-then the last thing he’ll remember... is how terrible a b-brother I was t’ him!...” He shut his eyes tightly and began to whimper and weep.

Liontail´s eyes went wide and lowered his ears "Wha-- no no no Asterspark, don´t say that" he said, rushing overand starting to lick between his brother´s ears, to calm him down

"Shhh... Aster, don´t say that... breathe... and listen to me"

Listening to his older brother, Asterspark began taking in shaky, sob-filled breaths and hiccups, trying to calm himself down. He looked up into Liontail's amber eyes, tears falling down his cheeks from his blue and yellow ones. "I-It's... my f-fault... I just... I just wanna apologize t' him... I wanna say s-sorry... I miss 'im, Liontail..."

"Asterspark, listen... you didn´t know that was going to happen... no cat around did know, you had no way to prevent it, sometimes... there are things that... just happen without a reason... you can´t blame yourself all the time..."

The older Tom talked, nuzzling into his brother´s fur to calm him down.

"It could have been anyone, Aster... it could have happened to anyone... maybe it was just destiny... some things just can´t be avoided"

Asterspark immediately pressed himself into Liontail's chest the moment they made physical contact, whimpering softly. "I-I just... I just wanna s-see him again... I want him to c-come home..." He nuzzled into his brother's fur, seeking comfort and also trying to dry away his tears. Still heeding his advice, the younger tom continued trying to breathe and calm back down.