Newtpaw's Moonstone Journey

Thistlepaw's head cocked slightly at Newtpaw's words, the faintest hint of surprise evident in the pale depths of her gaze as she continued to quietly study the tom before her. A sweet silence yawned between the two young cats while the gentle tug of a faint breeze caused Thistlepaw's form to waver for the briefest of moments, scattering several specks of white light around the ThunderClanners. Letting out soft sigh that ruffled her whiskers, the tabby gave Newtpaw a scathingly intense stare. Why was she so calm? She had utterly nothing to be calm about; she had nothing. The fervent expression that twisted her features melted away into one akin to weary resignation. "I'm not calm," She finally uttered, "I'm furious." The biting, partially whispered statement was a stark contrast from the bleak look upon the dead she-cat's face.

"But I have an infinite amount of time to linger over something as minuscule as my feelings." Thistlepaw murmured softly, her voice regaining some of its previous composure, although she still looked elderly and defeated. "Tonight is about you, Newtpaw. I'm here to answer any of the questions that you might have about the future. Close or distant, it matters not. I'll give you the advice you need most, my friend."

"This has everything to do with the future, Thistlepaw. If leaders turn to StarClan just to get advice that pits the whole forest against everyone else in the harsh time of Leafbare while we're already starving, I'll be permanently here. If you want a question about the future, here's one. Why should I look to StarClan for guidance or even trust what they have to say? What you have to say?"
I'm sure you've seen what your death has done to your mother. Blizzardstar has used you so much,
I won't be surprised if she digs you up and shows you off at the next gathering! StarClan has done nothing since the battle and we've suffered for trusting their words. Other leaders brought it up as well.
What will happen if a few StarClan cats decide ThunderClan deserves other clan's territory? What does StarClan's word have over the well-being of a RiverClan kit or WindClan's medicine cat or a ShadowClan elder?" The tom gave her a hard look. "Your miniscule feelings could end up being a command that leads more apprentices to die, Thistlepaw. It could end with apprentices never getting their warrior name because they're rotting and being used as the martyr in petty arguments. How can you not see that?" He took in a deep breath to calm his speech as it grew more into a faint growl of agitation. The tom had always prided himself on trying to not get involved in this stuff. He was no leader. But, he didn't know if that was the way to go anymore. He couldn't stand by any longer. He might as well have done the killing blow to Thistlepaw by not speaking up about it. He was just as guilty for not avenging her against that tom who had stolen her from them all and stolen her life and dreams from her. He'd kept this all pent up for so long with cats who either blindly followed the words of dead cats or were shocked that he askeed such questions. Not to mention he didn't want this stress on his father while he worried for his daughter. RiverClan was scum, ThunderClan was scum, they all were. No one was clean.

A spark of defiance and anger gleamed in Thistlepaw's gaze as she Newtpaw's words and it was as if his accusations exhaled a second wind into the long-furred tabby. The smooth fur atop her nape prickled sharply as she continued to gaze at the tom, her appearance now more closely resembling the bristling and constantly agitated look that Specklefang often wore. "Do not presume to speak to me about my mother as if I have no idea what I've done to her! I can see everything now, in case you didn't know." She bit back, the once weary expression upon her face giving way into one of uncharacteristic bitterness, "Just 'cause I'm dead doesn't mean I'm a blithering idiot." The newfound agitation present in her starry form causing the unearthly outline of her body to waver for a brief heartbeat. Scrambling to her paws, Thistlepaw's plumed tail lashed as she further processed his words. If he wanted her feelings, then he could have them.

"To lay the actions of the living solely at the feet of the dead is presumptuous and stupid. It's true that StarClan advised Blizzardstar to take back the Sunningrocks, but it wasn't as if Thunderstar himself descended from the clouds and decreed that if she didn't, all of ThunderClan would be obliterated and die a horrible death! Distrust your ancestors and their actions all you want, but perhaps you should turn your gaze to the cat who willingly led us into battle despite the promise of lives being lost. Ivystar promised that cats would die if ThunderClan tried to take her Clan's territory, and yet Blizzardstar didn't seem too concerned about that, now did she?" She returned Newtpaw's stare with an equally demanding one of her own, unwilling to bow down in the face of the challenge at paw. Thrusting her face closer to Newtpaw's own, so close that their noses practically touched, the tabby exhaled a breath that smelt of ancient stone and frost as she gazed intently into her former Clanmate's eyes.

"She had the audacity to mourn me, then turn right around and drag me through the mud as if I was nothing more but propaganda created in hopes of rallying sympathy to her ill-fated cause. It was if the only reason I mattered to Blizzardstar was because I happened to conveniently be the price of her actions." She finally uttered out, her throat feeling tight as she recounted the great sorrow she had felt when she had witnessed how Blizzardstar had spoken about her during last moons gathering. Perhaps if she possessed the ability to weep, she would of shed a few tears at the way that she had been used as nothing but a plea for support and sympathy from other Clans. She was nothing. She'd be forgotten within heartbeats of another apprentice dying too soon. "I know that you don't trust StarClan and quite frankly, I don't blame you- look at what it got me. A shallow grave and a brief eternity that'll only exist as long as Blizzardstar and Leopardclaw use me to guilt-trip other Clans. But trust me when I say that I don't want any other cats to be chained to such a fate. I can't truly impact anycat anymore, but I know you can." Thistlepaw quietly mewed, trying to keep the pleading edge out of her voice as she spoke to the darkly-colored tom once more.

Newtpaw seemed pleased that he'd struck a nerve. The calm, sweet words she had spoke before were never the ones he cared about. As she spoke, he felt as if things were clicking together like twigs snagged in a current. He'd been letting only Blizzardstar's delivery get to him, blaming the actual problem on StarClan. The tom wasn't even sure who he was doing that for. It only made him angry at himself for doing so now. Blizzardstar had truly led them into that battle with a very clear warning only to wave the consequence around. No- to wave Thistlepaw around, and her mother's grief, her father as well. She'd done the same thing with Honeyspark, his own sister. The bushy apprentice only blinked a bit when she grew suddenly close to him. Maintaining the gaze, he only felt the anger she possessed fill him as well.

Not only anger, he felt like there was a purpose now. He'd avoided the battle, he'd let his father grieve and worry in solitude. His mother spent her elder days without seeing so much as a whisker of him. Perhaps- perhaps he could do something this time. His gaze dropped to the side as he took in her words with more focus. With a sharp flick, he met her gaze again, picking up the last of her mew with much more than her feelings this time. "What should I do? What can I even do about this?" She said she was here to answer his questions but she'd only filled him with more of them. Harder ones too.

Thistlepaw's own gaze dropped to the star-flecked grass that rose up around her paws, contended to just watch at the way it stirred and bowed around them- it was almost as if it was alive. Flexing her paws slightly, it startled her to see that certain parts of her paws were beginning to fade away, allowing the foliage underpaw to become faintly visible through her. Was it really almost time for her to depart already? They had only been speaking for what seemed like heartbeats! Swallowing tightly, the tabby continued to gaze forlornly at the partially transparent parts of her body, intently thinking over the question that Newtpaw had asked. What could he do? If Blizzardstar and Ivystar were truly intent on battling to the death over those forsaken rocks, would anything truly change their minds? "The truth is I don't know exactly how." She finally mewed, looking at Newtpaw once more, weak starlight twinkling within the pale depths of her gaze, "But I know that it can be done."

A heavy gust of wind swept through the starry forest, sharply stirring the heavy greenery that surrounded the two apprentices. The sharp breath of strange wind tugged at Thistlepaw's form, drawing away several specks of light that formed her celestial body and instead casting them to the heavenly forest that unfolded all around them. "You're a smart cat Newtpaw, and you have the courage to question the decisions of any cat- even your ancestors. It might be a troublesome trait to have at times, but I believe that it good cat who can see past things that most don't. Encourage our Clanmates to see past the temporary promises of victory in a meaningless battle. Don't be afraid to question something if you believe it to be wrong." Thistlepaw sighed, the unspoken words 'don't let them die like I did' hanging heavily at the tip of her tongue. The cold darkness of consciousness was beginning to creep into the dream shared between Newtpaw and Thistlepaw, the dark tendrils of cold light slowly weaving their way through the dreamy foliage that stood before it, clearly intent on waking Newtpaw up shortly.

The tom felt foolish for thinking he'd have answers just passed to him. His eyes narrowed as he noticed her form fading. No! Please, not yet... "I think I get it." he shivered softly at the cold. Before, he'd prided his defiance for just that. Being rude, colloquial, and just all around unpleasant had been his pass time. Now, he had to put his questioning nature to good use. Hopefully, he could save a life this time around. His rude habits would be hard to curve but, that could be fixed later. He just needed to focus on the war and how to help cats on all sides. But how? Could he convince his clanmates to refuse battling? It'd force Blizzardstar to stop or she'd fight RiverClan by herself. Maybe. It seemed like a daunting task. Ugh, why him? "Thank you, Thistlepaw, I feel a whole lot less powerless in the chaos now. I- I'm sorry for the way you're treated among the clans now, hopefully I can try and stop that too..." Feeling himself waking, he sighed. "Goodbye." The foliage turned to stone and he felt everything ache. His eyes glowed like embers when he woke and stared at the Moonstone. Pressing his head to it, he let out a breath he didn't know he was holding and stood up on numb legs. He hoped he could do this. "Let's-" His voice was raspy and shaky. Clearing it, he spoke in a slightly stronger tone. "Let's go, Leopardclaw. There's work to do." The second sentence was more directed at himself as he stared at his paws with narrowed eyes.