ShadowClan Moonstone Journey [come one, come all]

Curlypaw met Shimmerheart's gaze, hoping that the she-cat's smile was genuine. As the SatrClan warrior explained who she was, the apprentice remembered where she had heard the name before. When she was a kit, her mother had told her a story about this she-cat. A sudden urge to impress the cat in front of her made the gray tabby speak with eagerness. "Oh I remember! My mother was a kit when you died, a branch feel on you during a thunderstorm, right?"
Hoping that she was right and wasn't just doing a stupid, she thought about the dead warrior's next words. Why was she here? Well, she wanted to be a warrior, and she had to do this to become one, but was there something more? She thought back to her original worries. Would StarClan still accept her for the mistakes she had made, would she be able to be strong despite her hearing disability? Judging from Shimmerheart's words so far, she assumed the first one was true. Choosing her words carefully, she spoke, hoping she wasn't rambling on too much. "Well, I came here because I have to do so to become a warrior, but there is also something I have been wondering. Am I a coward or a fox-heart? I get caught up in the moment and always make some weird mistake because of my stupid hearing problem. Will I be able to become a strong warrior despite that? And why do birds keep causing me trouble?"

"Doubt it," Shadewillow breezily rumbled, his broad chest vibrating slightly as he took in Lilacpaw's anxious and rather preoccupied state, "Unless you're somehow much older than you look- but you likely know my son Ryeheart." Had he been this nervous and fidgety whenever he was an apprentice? Shaking his large head in disagreement to his own thoughts, the dark tabby tom's glittering gaze thoughtfully settled on the grey she-cat in front of him. "Well? Got any questions for your oh-so wise and benevolent ancestors?" Shadewillow quickly questioned, his head cocking slightly as he threw formal mannerisms out the window.

Lilacpaw blinked. The breezy address of the StarClan cat surprised her - it wasn't what StarClan sounded like in stories. They were meant to be graceful and elegant and wise. "I... I do know who Ryeheart is," she murmured - she had observed the warrior often, alongside the rest of her Clanmates. "I do have... A few q-questions... I suppose?" Her voice was hesitant, as it usually was. "Am... Am I a failure? I've never won a fight, and I'm scared to fight anyone in the first place. I'm even scared of most of my own Clanmates... Doesn't that make me pathetic? How will I ever be a good warrior?" The questions tumbled out of her mouth without thinking, and barely a moment of silence passed before she continued. "I want to serve my Clan as a strong, loyal warrior... How am I supposed to do that?" She fell silent then, and simply waited for a response. She looked at the starry ground rather than directly at Shadewillow, afraid to see the StarClan warrior's reaction to her words.

Shimmerheart inclined her head as the apprentice remembered. "I saved Leopardstar- Leopardfang, then- by pushing him out of the way of that branch. At the time, I think he would rather have died. But he needed to lead his Clan, even for the comparatively brief time that he did." She felt only a slight bit of sadness remembering her death; she supposed it had been for the best in the long run. And now, here she was, her entire family reunited together again: Leopardstar, who went too soon for his Clan; Tigerflower, murdered by the rogue Bear; Webtail, cast out from his Clan for past mistakes but finding new glory; Viperfang, who took so long to find her way home; and Shrewkit, who never lived more than a few minutes, but stole his rightful place in her heart just the same. She had found almost more happiness in death than she did in life, and so it was for many of the StarClan warriors. But enough reminiscing about herself. She was here for Curlypaw.

The slim black she-cat listened sincerely to the tabby apprentice's worries, her deep hazel eyes thoughtful. When the living she-cat was finished, Shimmerheart sat and considered for a moment before answering. Her eyes, perhaps the only truly beautiful thing about her, seemed to stare into the apprentice's soul, almost brighter than the stars that speckled the sky above them both. "Curlypaw, you are not a coward nor a fox-heart. Just because you have a little bit of self-doubt and some trouble finding your path does not mean that you are not completely fit for it. Just look at me as an example." The StarClan she-cat let out a faint chuckle as she thought back to when she was Curlypaw's age. "As a kit, all I wanted to do was be a medicine cat. Thrushstar had approved me, and I just had to wait for Ebonyleaf- the medicine cat back then- to accept me as her apprentice. But she never so much as acknowledged my desire. I waited in the nursery for moons later than I should have, watching all of my denmates grow older and become apprentices. Eventually, it took a visit from StarClan to set me on the right path- becoming a loyal warrior, and a mother." The slim black she-cat, moving with grace and agility that belied her actual age, moved over to lay her thin tail over Curlypaw's shoulders. "Your hearing problem does not define you. Your mistakes do not define you. Your actions will define you, Curlypaw. If you work around your issue and practice, then you will be one of the greatest warriors in your Clan. All you need to do is work hard, and listen to those who love and respect you, and you can live a long life of service to ShadowClan. Being a loyal warrior and serving your Clan is the highest honor, and if you continue on this path, then you will make it to StarClan. I am sure of it."

Her hazel eyes warm and encouraging, Shimmerheart touched her nose to the apprentice's before moving away. "Go on, Curlypaw- your life awaits you. Don't disappoint me- and do remember to give credit where credit is due! If you ever truly need help, I'll be there watching you. Call me, and I'll be there. Now, go and serve your Clan." The starry she-cat began to fade away, still smiling widely as she talked. Her voice grew fainter as her outline began to look less and less like a cat and more like a cluster of stars, slowly rising towards Silverpelt. "Oh, and about the birds...." But at that point, Shimmerheart was gone, and Curlypaw was left alone on the silvery plains. Her communion with StarClan was over.

Curlypaw listened with a little disinterest to Shimmerheart's first words. She had never really understood how love was a good thing, in her experience it had only been like an annoying thorn in her flank. Due to her lack of understanding of it, she didn't really care much. All she got from the she-cat's words were that she had saved Leopardstar, and therefor had helped out the clan. Her interest grew when the passed warrior started talking about her. She couldn't help but breath out heavily at the notion that StarClan didn't hold any of her mistakes against her. Her hearing problem wouldn't stop her from becoming the best warrior possible. She was almost unable to hold in her laughter at the comparison. For some reason, she couldn't imagine the cat in front of her being a medicine cat. Though she didn't quite get what not becoming a medicine cat had to do with her lack of an ear, but it was reassuring to know that everyone had difficulties they had to face. And it made her feel better that her problem wasn't totally self-made, like some other cat's problems were. Her confidence grew as Shimmerheart explained how she had the ability to be great. She should probably cherish her relationships with Cedarstorm and Lilacpaw more, as they were good friends that could make life so much easier if she listened to them more often. Right then, she made up her mind to become the best warrior that ShadowClan had ever seen.
"Thanks Shimmerheart. I really needed that." She smiled at the black she-cat. It felt weird to have met a dead cat for such a short amount of time, and then have it never happen again. But she felt sure that it was a good thing this had happened, no matter how short it was. She realized her unanswered question the same time the other she-cat did. "Wait, what about birds?" By the time she had finished her sentence, she was back in the cave.

Sitting back onto his haunches, Shadewillow's left ear twitched as he listened to Lilacpaw hesitantly speak. Comforting and encouraging cats had never been his specialty whenever he was alive, but at least had the benefit of infinite wisdom on his side now. That counted for something, right? The burly tom let out a short, nearly inaudible sigh after Lilacpaw finished speaking, the gears in his mind turning as he thought of the best way to address the issues the young she-cat had laid at his paws. "Fearing battles doesn't make any cat a coward- it simply means that you're able to recognize what all might happen." Shadewillow began, his head shaking slightly within the mane of his nape fur, "All that matters is that you fight alongside your Clanmates when the time comes, even if you do feel afraid. Even the greatest Warriors lost a fight or two during their heydays." He continued, amber eyes gleaming as he spoke.

Reaching out with a large forepaw, the dark tabby tom lightly prodded Lilacpaw's face so that she was looking directly at him once more. Ryeheart and Lynxpaw had always adopted a similar forlorn look whenever they were fessing up to something they had done, but the starry tom would have none of it. "There is never a 'best way' to serve our Clans, but if there was, I would gladly tell you what it is. All you can do is continue serving your Clan to the best of your abilities- even if it is just in mundane duties like hunting or patrolling." Shadewillow mewed softly, his voice much more gentle as he spoke. "Put faith in your ancestors and know that we walk with you every step of the way." He finished, his starry form beginning to dissipate as he spoke to Lilacpaw, as if a breeze was blowing away his ghostly form.

Lilacpaw nodded slowly at the fading warrior's words, finding a small amount of comfort in them. "Thank you," she whispered as he disappeared, hoping he could hear her. Before a clear answer reached her, however, she was back by the Moonstone. She looked over to ensure Curlypaw was still there, and stretched a little. The hard part, she supposed, was over. All that was left to do now was to return home, right? A slight panic overtook her and she spun around to ensure Littlebrook's presence, sighing in relief as the deputy was still there.