Long Time No See [Closed]

It had been moons since he had tasted that scent.

Shadepaw had first caught it on the outskirts of the territory towards the highstones quite some time ago, but it had been so incredibly faint that he had been able to dismiss it as his own imagination and in response to the flood of memories, he buried himself deeper into his training with Wildfang. Then, a couple of sunrises ago, he had found it closer to the carrionplace, but thanks to the overwhelming stench of rubbish, he had been able to lock away the thought as quickly as it came. When she disappeared all those moons ago, the Clan fretted that she had fallen prey to a hunger-mad fox or badger, or that she had become injured or ill and had crawled away to die, but he always knew deep down what had happened. "She never could handle the looks or whispers." Shadepaw reflected bitterly, ignoring the burning sensation in his paws and pushing onward, "I don't blame her, but they've always looked at us like that since the moment Hawkmask gave birth to us, how could she of not gotten used to it?" He gritted his teeth, bounding through the thick snow, his jaws parted to follow the now much stronger scent.

It was two sunrises ago when he had found irrefutable proof; a clump of silvery-brown fur snagged on brambles close to the Deep-Marshes. He had been out on patrol when he had discovered the strands of fur, so he had quickly tugged away from the brambles and buried it deep within the snow; the others couldn't know until he was absolutely sure. At dawn, Shadepaw set out before any of his clanmates could of notice him leaving, and began his tracking expedition through the territory. Her scent had nearly been lost due to the fact that fresh snow had fallen over night, but he had managed to find it and track it to an abandoned badger set; the only scent that clung to the cavernous hole was definitely his littermate's. Crouching down in front of the thick shadows of the abandoned badger set, Shadepaw took in a deep breath, inhaling the familiar scent with a fresh new wave of heartsickness, "Stormpaw? Is that really you?" He croaked, amber eyes gleaming as he peered down into the darkness of the warm den.

Stormpaw didn't know what she had expected, in retrospect. The mocking eyes of her Clanmates and the barbed taunts of the other apprentices -- no wonder you're so soft, you'll never be a warrior -- and if her brain's been repeating those since the first time she heard them hissed into her ear as she turned, well, they had hurt badly enough to bait her into her undignified exit. She's not ashamed of herself, exactly; why should she be? It was a pain scrabbling for the barest scraps of affection or praise, always, always lesser in some way. For every insult she has about kittypets, about the soft, scared things that dared to call each other rogues, she can admit their kindness a relief.

          She still couldn't have stayed away, though.

Stormpaw had had the taste of what her life could have been, what she would have turned into if Hawkmask had let them be raised by their father, and it soured her mouth. She'd hate Hawkmask for as long as she lived, but hatred is cold comfort in the winter. It wouldn't do any good except to shred at her lazy demeanor, hollowing it out into little more than a pelt tossed casually over her truths. She shook the sweet mask out of her fur and eyes, and blinked right back at her long-lost brother.

"Don't you recognize me, Shadepaw? I'm hurt."

More so surprised that you actually managed to pluck up the courage to come back." Shadepaw growled warily; sniffing his sisters scent once more in hopes of finding a clue towards where she had gone all those moons ago. Disbelief filled him, along with a pang of resentment- didn't Stormpaw realize that her behavior will have only solidified everyone's claims against them? How difficult it would be for her to come back? "Thrushstar did let Larksong rejoin the Clan, but I see the way they glare at her."  He reflected with a twitch of his tail, recalling the whispers he had encountered both within his own clan and the others. "Have you suddenly decided that you can handle the way they look at us? Because if so, you might want to reconsider because if you come back now, after leaving, they'll glare even more." Shadepaw challenged, although his voice lacked any real resolve or anger; despite everything that had occurred since Stormpaw left, she would always be his only kin that he would truly be able to connect with.

Stormpaw crinkled her muzzle at Shadepaw, pushing roughly past him and out of her cramped shelter with her old, familiar flick of a tail to his flank. She arranged her paws neatly, lashing tail laid over her silky fur and dulled claws, and cast him a mocking look complete with an utterly prim posture. "I decided that this was the life I wanted, and at least now they have a real reason to look at me like that. Look on the bright side! You'll seem even better compared to me, now." She mewed a cutting laugh, voice dipping light with breezy cynicism. "Didn't you miss me at all? We're family, you know." 'And you don't seem to care, but I do.'

-since this topic was started prior to him becoming a warrior he's still an apprentice, h e c k-

"Of course I missed you," Shadepaw snipped in response to his sister's biting words, "but I would prefer to know if you'll actually stick around long enough to notice how they look at us before you play the role of martyr." He pointed out icily, sitting down as well. There was so many different things he wished to say, but everything he wanted to say felt incredibly heavy on his tongue; as if it were weighted down within his mouth. Twitching his ear, he continued to look at Stormpaw; amber eyes sizing her up with an unreadable look. "So where did you really go?" He finally questioned, gazing at her sleek fur; she was obviously doing better than the rest of Shadowclan currently was, "You'll need to work on your story if you want Thrushstar to accept you." Shadepaw grunted, acknowledging his leader's erratic behavior when it came to rogues and outsiders.