I know there have been a lot of questions surrounding why there had been a mass-leaving recently, a lot involving both HRs and members of the Staff Team so I would like to explain why I personally stepped down from my moderator position.

I will only be talking about my own experience and why I stepped down. No one else's. It may not feel nice to read and you may not like me for it afterwards, but that is the risk I am willing to take in trying to be heard and give my own side now that screenshots have been pushed out within the discord with no provided context. Not that I don't think it wont be, but I just ask that my point of view is taken seriously and that I'm responded to with the respect that anyone in this position should be given.

I'm going to start from the very beginning to address the context of why and how my response in those screenshots even came to be.

I want to emphasize that I viewed Ripped as a friend, even before she returned to WCC. I was very excited at the prospect of RPing with her and hanging out and chatting and catching up. There had been absolutely no issues when she joined the team; we got a lot done and had a lot more lined up in hopes for a better future for WCC. I personally felt everything was fine and this team would thrive.

The problem only started when talks about KJ were brought up during the time she was choosing her deputy for SkyClan.

To be clear, these talks didn't blindside us at all, since concerns over KJ came up during Ripped's initial interview. This is fine. All of Staff was gathered together in one place. It was as good a time as any to voice concerns, especially since KJ was a mini-mod at the time (which was staff adjacent, meaning the two would be in close proximity).

The following is where the problem began for me. I have included most every screenshot except for things that don't directly relate to the build up of why I left. This means screenshots about problems that are not related to this one were removed. If you have any questions about the context of any screenshots you see within the screenshot provided, those are unfortunately not my questions to answer. I'm sorry that these might be blurry:

Spoiler:

To give a brief summary, there had been a miscommunication where Ripped believed the Staff team at the time wanted to not only remove KJ from the mini-mod position, but to revoke HR and even debated on a temporary ban from the community. We were not in agreement over this, to which Ripped genuinely believed we were not on her side. It was expressed directly that it felt like Ripped was thinking we would be on her side strictly because we were friends, rather than putting bias aside and looking at the situation how we are supposed to look at it... With facts and evidence, rather than bad vibes.

I felt uncomfortable with the way she reacted to me not being in agreement of doing anything other than having a chat with the effected party first, so I stepped away. At one point, we were in each others DMs because Ripped asked me for my thoughts on if she was a good fit for the team, and more talks of KJ were brought up.

Here are some screenshots of proof that there was a conversation had. There are minor swears in this:

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I personally felt that the conversation was now going into a spiral. I put an end to the conversation. I was asked for advice and to be honest and it felt like it was being turned around on me. This was an attempt made following the conflict resolution guide before it was even thought of. I no longer felt comfortable in being able to discuss something with someone I thought to be a friend without it turning into another argument.

At this point, I made note to Kitty who was on the team at the time that I felt the conversation hadn't gone over well at all and that I would like to not be a part of any conversation involving Ripped and KJ going forward. As seen in the image below:

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I honestly felt strange working with Ripped after that, but it wasn't enough for me to address it. I genuinely thought it was just... A me problem. It was later that it felt like I was losing the ability to work with Ripped as a person, and felt unwelcomed on the team; that my input was not wanted and even hated at times.

Here are some screenshots of a few incidents:

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There was also a point at the end of Kitty's time on staff where she was openly being excluded from talks about future staff related things. Which was unacceptable and actually quite shocking to see in real time. I now no longer felt safe in announcing my own leave for fear I would also get excluded and seen as not a part of the team while I was actively still there and participating. I also thought I wouldn't get to even be granted the the monitored talk with Ripped if I announced too soon that I no longer wanted to be on staff. For context on that, I've also included those screenshots which took place before I had announced I would be leaving and before the group convo with Ripped happened:  

Spoiler:

Overall, it really felt like Ripped was taking things too personally and lashing out. It felt jarring to suddenly be met with (what I felt was) hostility or claims that she was being called dumb or bad at her job, on top of being met with what felt like passive-aggressive comments every time we weren't in total agreement. There are more small tiny things like this, but these were main ones that the admins were around to witness first hand.

Slowly, it felt like we were butting heads and I didn't understand why. I was not talked to by Ripped at any point after our initial talk about the KJ thing, and I will admit I didn't reach out to her either. I felt like I couldn't get a conclusion out of any further discussions with her based solely on the one we had about KJ.

I did the only thing I could think of and turn to my admins for help. I will admit... It took much longer for the conversation to take place than I would have liked. I'm usually the type to want to talk things out immediately, so it not happening right away was frustrating, to say the least. I understand that my ask collided with their irl lives and schedules, but it was making things worse to not address my concerns. Ones that I was told I wasn't alone in.

Here's some proof that I did try and get help for my situation with Ripped:

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This is water under the bridge for me since we did eventually get to it, even if I personally didn't find the conversation to be useful. I didn't reply to Ripped after her last message, finding it completely useless for me to do so. I know these screenshots were sent in the discord already, but I'm sending them again:

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I will admit that this is not my only reason for stepping down.

a) I got overwhelmed by the community itself sometimes when a decision was made that wasn't well liked. It's not wrong for the community to voice their opinions, and it should be encouraged. I struggle with chronic anxiety and it was overwhelming for me to experience first hand, as well as some ongoing health conditions that get worse when anxiety peaks.

b) I'm already in an HR position. Keeping up with those responsibilities while also having to be active in posting and preform my staff duties was exhausting. At some point it just stopped being fun. It felt very much like a chore.

c) I was unable to resolve my issues with a team member, and felt I never could. It felt like I was being gaslit into thinking I was the one instigating things anytime I tried talking about my problems to Ripped, so cutting it off here and no longer putting up with it was my best solution. I removed myself from the problem only after I felt there were no solutions left.

It was in my best interest to step away from the Staff team as a whole, and I had announced that I would be doing so after the failed monitored conversation was had with Ripped and Holly. May 7th was my deadline for us to find someone to replace Kitty and get the teams numbers back up before I left... Unfortunately, I couldn't hold out anymore. The response that was given to a concern about another user by my fellow staff team was extremely disheartening and I was so very angry; it was my last straw to finally say goodbye. I said my peace and then I left.

Here was my farewell message, though be warned there is one singular swear in it:

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I had no intentions of leaving a goodbye message or an explanation for WCC when I stepped down - though I know I should have since I am a very active member of the community. There wasn't much to say other than I was basically just burnt out and wanted to focus on having fun again. I hope this clears the air a little on the context of some screenshots sent within discord that hold my name and my words. If you have any questions, I will do my best to answer them via DM.

Do I think I could have handled things better? Always. There will always be something I could have done better. But what's done is done, and I feel a weight off my shoulders to finally not have the burden of putting up with these things anymore.

Thank you for your patience while I sorted through some things and collected myself,

Fly