love thinks no evil (c)

Wolfpaws feet were practically ran off of him with Silverhawk and training. If he wasn't with Silverhawk, he was on a patrol with one of his siblings (or more, if he could manage it). He only rested during day when they did, and if they were roused for a mid-day patrol, then so was he. He was only content when they were all together with him, and if they were not in camp, he was tagging along. He wished he could be in two places at once so he could keep an eye on them all, but alas, he could not.

And thus, came his current dilemma. They were all training or on full-up patrols, and Silverhawk was busy. It was like there were ants in his brain, nipping at them and telling him terrible things. Quillsplash was certainly tormenting Hedgepaw, and Fernpaw had gotten too curious and fallen off something, and Stagpaw had tried to figh-- His eyes locked onto the fluffed brown and white shape not too far ahead. His heart almost seized, and in a blur, he had head-butt his mother so ferociously he could have easily knocked her.

"Mama," He said, his eyes locked on to her almost uncomfortably. "Are you okay? What are you doing? Do you need help? Let me come with you. Don't go by yourself, let me come with you." He said multiple other variations of this, his eyes scouring her top to bottom as though looking for invisible wounds and then fixating straight back onto hers. Waiting. Unmoving. Was he waiting for an answer, or just making sure she didn't dissapear?

discord: moonazine| timezone: gmt| code (c) kieer

Pineblossom

Pineblossom staggered as something suddenly barreled into her flank and she turned to either scold or attack whatever had just slammed into her. When she saw that it was Wolfpaw, the ferocity dissipated, but not quite her annoying. He spoke faster than the birds twittering in the trees and she reached out a paw to place lightly on his head.

“Wolf, dear, be quiet a moment,” she said, and waited until he did so. His eyes were looking over her with such a fixation. Pineblossom had noticed how often he left camp as well—it was worrying her, to be frank. “You sound like your head is full of bees. I am alright. I was going to go out and get some water.” She tilted her head. “You’ve been leaving camp quite a lot lately. Is something wrong?”

ShadowClan • Tier 5 • She/Her • 70 | 160 • #6699ff

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Wolfpaws incessant queries ground to a halt when he felt the familiar weight of his mothers paw against his forehead. He blinked, as though suddenly ripped from a transfixation, and his ears angled backward if only slightly. His mothers voice was like puncturing the delicate underside of a leaf that had been chewed on by a bug but not enough to tear through the veining. A burst bubble.

"I am okay," He answered slowly, exhaling a sharp huff of air to gather his bearings again. "Nothing is wrong. That is because I'm going out with the others-- So, I'm gonna come with you too. That way nothing bad'll happen." He ran his tongue along his lips, his tensed shoulders beginning to relax once more. "Everyone else is on a patrol. So I need to go with you. Have to go with you-- Otherwise something bad might happen."

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Pineblossom

Pineblossom’s eyes softened and she slid to lay down in front of him, silently encouraging him to do the same. “Wolf, nothing bad is going to happen,” she told him. “I know that you have been through a lot since you were born. But the world is not quite as dangerous as it may feel. Bad things happen—but that is not because you are not present. It is impossible to be everywhere at once.” She settled her paw down from his face. “It is not healthy to hold onto this kind of anxiety.”

ShadowClan • Tier 5 • She/Her • 70 | 160 • #6699ff

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Wolfpaws tail may has well have been a lash, slamming into the ground repetetively as he settled in beside his mother. His gaze never left her, occasionally straying to opposite ends of her face to avoid that eerie glare he sometimes had, but never left her. Her words did not fall on deaf ears, but he did not believe them. It was not because they had been through a lot. It was not because they had been displaced for so long. It was because-- Quillsplash flashed briefly into his mind, and the rage was hard to quell. He grit his teeth, lips curling for the shortest of seconds. He would hurt Hedgepaw in the end. He knew it.

"It is not anxiety, Mama," Wolfpaw said resolutely. "I know it's true. I- I am protecting them. If I go with them, then I can make sure nothing happens. See- Hedgepaw? Quillsplash has done nothing to her. That is because I go with them as much as I can. And- And Stagpaw, Leopardstar hasn't told him to do anything foolish. And you are alive."

He ran his tongue over his lips, the words leaving his mouth almost feverishly. It was nice to speak them out loud, at least. That way, his family would know the danger they faced and know that he was there to protect them. "I do not wish to be everywhere," He said quietly. "Only where they, and you, are."

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Pineblossom

Had Pineblossom not had a lot of self control, she may have laughed at Wolfpaw’s clear misunderstanding. She replied, “I understand the desire to be close with your family to help protect them. I felt that if I was away from you kids for too long, something would happen. I still feel that way—but you all are older, you’re smarter, and you have your mentors to look after you. If I tried to be with you all of the time, I think I would never sleep.”

She focused on her son and said seriously, “It is frightening when you can’t be with someone you care about to make sure they’re safe. But if you burden yourself with all of that responsibility, you not only make things hard on yourself and risk your own health due to overworking, but you also make the others believe you don’t think they’re capable of standing on their own paws. Your family is not going through life alone; the entire clan is here to watch for them. I don’t want you pushing yourself to burn-out because you want to be watching over them every second of their lives.”

ShadowClan • Tier 5 • She/Her • 70 | 160 • #6699ff

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Wolfpaw blinked. Of all cats, he believed his mother would have understood. She almost did, and said so herself. And then suddenly she did not, and his tail thumped the ground and his ground teeth were the only indication of frustration.

"No," He said sharply, and shook his head. "No. The Clan will not protect them, why would they? I don't trust the Clan do to that, I don't think they would. Do you not see how they look, Mama? How they stare? I've seen it-- especially the outsiders. I am not letting them hurt my siblings, or you. I can't be the only one who sees it, Mama."

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Pineblossom

Pineblossom shook her head. “They will not hurt them, Wolfpaw.” She reached out and set a paw on top of his. “Our clanmates are not related to us by blood, but they are like our family. We defend each other, take care of each other. It is what the warrior code is built upon.” She caught the way that Wolfpaw ground his teeth and how his tail flicked irritably. She wondered where he got these sorts of thoughts in his mind. “You love all of us and we love you. But it is not healthy to be suspicious of anyone who is not family. There are good cats in this clan. Those outside of the clan—sure, it is hard to know their intentions. But our clanmates are here to protect our family just as much as we are.”

She tilted her head and concern blossomed in her chest. She frowned and asked, “Did someone do something to you, Wolfpaw? Is that why you think our clanmates cannot be trusted?”

ShadowClan • Tier 5 • She/Her • 70 | 160 • #6699ff

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The contact always gave him pause. It was like a switch, the posture slacking and his eyes fixing on it as though it were the strangest, rarest thing in the world. His tail stilled, and one could almost hear the creak of his jaw loosening again.

"Nobody has done anything, Mama," He answered slowly, flexing his paw and feeling the courseness of her pad atop it. It reminded him of the nursery. Safe there. "I haven't let them. I won't let them. You are all safe, at least when I am watching. They don't try anything when I am there."

His eyes moved from the two paws and back up to his mothers face. He could almost see it. He would turn his back and the light her eyes would be gone, and someone-- Quillsplash? Yes, of course-- Would have killed her. He felt a shudder run through him. "Why do you trust him so much?" He asked, earnestly, but a hint of terseness.

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Pineblossom

A small frown found its way onto her face. This paranoia of Wolfpaw’s seemed difficult to reason with. She blinked. “Trust who?” she asked. After a moment when he clarified Quillsplash, she replied, “Well he is our clanmate, for one. He has not done anything to show that he is bad for another. And I trained him, for a third.” Her expression softened. “I know him better than you do, Wolfpaw. I don’t know him perfectly, but he reminds me of you. He guards, and he protects. He sees danger at every turn. Perhaps that is why he makes you nervous. He is always looking for danger, and so he can seem dangerous in that way. But he isn’t. He is just a cat, like any other in our clan.” She dipped her head a bit. “I have lived many, many moons. I have seen a lot of danger, Wolfpaw. I know some things are inevitable, and you cannot keep everything away as much as you would like to. And if you keep in that bubble, of wanting to protect over everything else, it will halt your life. It will hurt you. You will be so focused on perceived danger to yourself or others that you will stop trying to do things that will give you something to live for. I went through that at your age and it caused me a lot of pain. I don’t want the same for you.”

ShadowClan • Tier 5 • She/Her • 70 | 160 • #6699ff

Credits: code inspiration - 1 2 |  image 1 | image 2 | image 3

Wolfpaw blinked, and then he dragged his paw out from under his mothers. He was motionless for a time, letting her words digest. They made sense. Too much sense. His eyes narrowed just slightly, fixating on his mother less with the reckless fanaticism of before, and more so with something along the lines of suspicion.

"He told you to say that," Wolfpaw decided. His paws felt itchy. "Because he knew I would try to tell you. He is lying to you." His tongue ran across his lips, his nose scrunched as he fought back a snarl. Quillsplash or no, he would not snarl at his mother. He was going to help her. "You will see, soon, what he is. I am sure."

discord: moonazine| timezone: gmt| code (c) kieer