Wildpaw’s Moonstone Journey

He looked at his brother with a vague smile and then sighed "I talked to him.. Echofall.. H-he doesn't blame me but.. What I did was wrong! He should blame me!". He looked down at the ground "Am I really worthy of becoming a warrior?" he asked "Because sometimes I feel like I'm not!".

”You aren’t the only one,” Scorchfang sighed softly. ”I may not have killed a cat as an apprentice, but I did have an affair with a RiverClan cat and have a son who lives in said Clan — I’m certain I’ve told you of this — but Littlestar still saw me worthy of becoming not just a warrior, but Clan deputy later on. You’re not a bad cat, Wildpaw. Littlestar knows this, too. You are worthy of being a warrior just as everyone else is.”

"You have a son? Well I know you a Minnowcall have a sons but a half-clan son?! Have you meet him? How is he?" he asked, not botherd by the fact that his brother had broken the code, he wanted to know everything about this cat, his half-clan nephew.

Scorchfang sighed heavily. He hadn't wanted to talk about his firstborn son, but he didn't want to hide anything from Wildpaw. "...Do you remember when that RiverClan she-cat came into ShadowClan territory about a moon ago? You were probably asleep or out training with other apprentices. Anyway, that cat... was Sweet. Well, Sweetheart, but her name was stripped from her after she was exiled from RiverClan. That cat... was my first mate, before I fell in love with Minnowcall. She was exiled when Ivystar discovered that Shadefang had not a RiverClan father, but a ShadowClan father -- that father is obviously me, but I never knew until Shadefang's mentor at the time, Silverfang, confronted me at Fourtrees and told me about him. I haven't gotten to know Shadefang, and... the truth is, I don't want to. I'm... I'm afraid to.

"I've spent so long running away from my past that now... it feels like the past is starting to haunt my present," the deputy continued. "I won't lie... but... there was a time I tried following Sweet's scent, which led me to Twolegplace. I don't love her anymore, but she was still my mate at one point, so I had to know if she was okay. And I... I-I found her... dead." He stopped walking and lowered his head, his eyes shut closed as he tried to keep his tears at bay. "I...I just know what happened to her... I know that Shadefang killed her. Because I could just faintly smell his scent mingled with the scent of fear and death. Shadefang killed his own mother, and... I'm... I'm afraid of my own son. Great StarClan, I'm such a terrible father!... I'm afraid of my own son, because I know he must hate me for never being there for him, even though I never knew about him! And now I'm doing my best to forget all about my past misdeeds, and it feels like I'm just making things worse! I don't know why Littlestar wanted me to stay as her deputy when I finally told her -- I know Nettlesting definitely wanted me demoted at the very least, if not exiled as well.

"I've been such a troublemaker as an apprentice, and now... now I see that I still am. I'll never be better than the cat I used to be. I'll never be what ShadowClan needs me to be as deputy." Great StarClan, he hated looking and feeling this weak in front of his Clanmates, especially in front of his family. But now that the bottle had opened, he just couldn't stop the contents from flowing out. His shoulders shook with sobs he struggled to suppress, yet tears still fell to the ground.

He stood quietly and looked at his brother for a shrort while before he took a step closer and nudged his brother gently on the shoulder "I can't think of any cat in this clan who would make a better deputy than you. If I where you I would also be scared, I would be terrified. It's not you're fault okay? Just remember that and no matter what happens I will always see you as my deputy and ofcourse as my big brother! You know, you're my role model" he meowed and looked at his brother, he hated seeing his brother this broken, he never wanted to fall in love.
He was almost sure that Shadefang would be killed, he had killed his own mother.. A cat that does that will most like kill others to and one day that would come back and bite him. But he didn't wanna say that out loud, it was still the son of Scorchfang.

Scorchfang looked up at Wildpaw, tears still swimming in his eyes, and he snuggled and blinked them away. Then he smiled. ”Thank you, Wildpaw. That means a lot.” He took a shaky deep breath to calm his nerves again. ”Alright, let’s get you back home, shall we?” With that, the deputy led his brother back to ShadowClan.

He smiled at his brother and followed him, atlest he was gonna become a warrior soon.