Stars of Light?? Stars of Lies!! [Open]

Stormwatcher's ears flicked, the tom was anxious out of his mind. He had had enough! All this star talk all this mistrust was reaching a boiling point!

He wanted to put his paw down on it all! To scream! His eye twitched and he could feel his tongue sticking out momentarily in a blep motion from the stress of it all.

The wolves, the unending nonsense that went down at the gatherings, it was becoming too much to even think about.

How many more times would he have to go to such pointless events where trouble always seemed to follow? What good were their supposed warrior ancestors of light if this is what happened on such supposedly "sacred" ground?

How many more cats must spill blood in order for tradition to be upheld in the name of what exactly?

He annoyedly put his paw on the ground scrapping at the earth below him in his nervous tick of energy.

When he first started having these thoughts he wondered if he should go in, seek help from a med cat or something... but he was a warrior very unfamiliar with tradition at all, he knew not much of clan life ironically even though he had lived clanside his whole life.

He in fact, never even had a moonstone journey, he had been passed from mentor to mentor in his youth as the "problem appretnice" that was back in his lazy days of not doing anything and at some point they decided he was ready for warriorhood without ever checking if he even did the required list of "oh so important things"

He was begining to feel the tug at his heart away from starclan... yes he belived they existed that was hard to deny. What he no longer belived was that they were the ones that were so noble or right all the time. He was pretty sure starclan was just a different side of the leaf for the dark forest, the two were the same thing really just a little different.

Their differences seemed to be played up in nursery stories of how the mighty starclan was so good and pure... but looking around he saw nothing pure or good by having the clans gather once a moon to act as sitting prey for hungry predators lurking about...

If they really cared about the living why would they have them all gather to be so easily picked off? Perhaps as some sick joke or spectacle for them to enjoy!?

He was losing his mind over thinking about it... He wished he had someone to talk to about it.

The big tom glanced upwards as sounds of pawsteps came closer. He flicked an ear at Foxsnaps questioning words.

Normally, the gruff tom would just brush any such concerns away with a 'oh, its nothing, don't worry about me' kind of energy followed by a sure confident nod before he would wander off to go get a little nap or something like that.

This time though he pawed a bit more at the ground restlessly.

His former apprentice was coming over too, still baring the limp that the dog had left him with.

Hickorysmoke had been nothing but a burr stuck in his pelt the entire apprenticeship but now that he was warrior Storm felt a small part of him miss having two apprentices, not that he would be caught ever saying such a thing aloud. He didn't know what to think of it all, but somehow the dog had gotten the two of them closer together in the strange turn of events.

And that was just the thing, he couldn't stop thinking about how things were not always as they apperead.

For instance, when Wolfstar assigned him apprentices he was usually always very upset by that decision only to later be very fond of all his apprentices even if in secret longing to protect them. - Or that the dog had in a strange way made Hickory and him understand one another on some level... Nothing in this forest was necessarily their face value. Which made the tom begin the open pandora's box of what else in this world was not as it might initially appear.

The longer he stared into the depths of the thought process the deeper down the hole it led his mind.

"It's uhh nothing" he began just by default as that was his common response to any time he was asked if something was bothering him.

He stopped himself though... maybe others felt the same way but no one ever spoke of it from the taboo nature of it all.

"I just... sometimes feel like bad luck just follows us around... and I'm beginning to think its not just luck that is causing it is all. He finally meowed with a bit of a sigh. It felt so foreign, sharing his thoughts like this so openly. In his early days he was the lazy warrior until Wolf had gotten his rump into gear - she made him into at least a decent warrior and told him he needed more friends too - something he was still working on and wasn't the best at doing. But this sharing of what he thought felt strangely good in a certain way, like a weight was slowly being pushed off his back.

He glanced side-eyeing his younger clanmates, "You think its just... coincidence that so many earth changing supposedly once in a lifetime events keep on happening to us?". He himself was already drawing conclusions as to what might be at paw but being so new to this whole 'sharing of feelings' thing he was not yet brave enough to discuss what he fully thought of it all yet.