Wasppaw's Moonstone Journey

With Thymelight cooped up with illness, Wolfstar was the one to take today's apprentice to the moonstone, something that wasn't new for the leader. Her own apprentice, Wasppaw. It filled her with both a sense of pride and dread to see her apprentice's training going so well. The moonstone was the final undertaking before a warrior ceremony... And Wasppaw was indeed approaching hers. More warriors was a good thing, of course, but the name and rank wouldn't stop Wolfstar from worrying when so many had been lost since leafbare.

The leader poked her head into the apprentice den, Wasppaw at least would be used to rising early. "Time to get up, Wasppaw. Today's your moonstone trip." The leader stepped back to wait until the apprentice exited the den and nudged a small bundle of herbs toward her. "Eat these, they give your strength for the journey and will keep you from getting hungry." Once Wasppaw had eaten the disgusting herbs, the pair would set off, Wolfstar leading the way through the territory.

---

The sun had barely begun to rise as they had left camp, and now it cast long shadows highstones as the two Skyclanners neared the entrance to the tunnels that would take them down to the moonstone. "It will be dark, so stick close and use your whiskers. Grab my tail if you need to. When we get down to the moonstone, you just touch your nose to it and fall asleep. I can't speak for what you'll see or who you'll talk to, but I'll be there when you wake up." When Wasppaw confirmed she was ready, Wolfstar led her into the familiar tunnels. The walk seemed to pass quickly, and the pale light of the moonstone soon shone before them. Wolfstar stepped aside to let Wasppaw pass, lightly brushing her tail across the apprentice's shoulder.

Wasppaw's entire life was Wolfstar, it seemed. Not that she minded. She quite enjoyed Wolfstar's presence and while she still respected the leader, she felt as if they had a comfortable bond. So with that said, the long walk to the Moonstone was filled with Wasppaw's characteristic comments and Wolfstar's replies as the shadows started to grow.

She was, however, a little nervous when she entered the tunnels. It felt like she was being pressed in on her and she wasn't quite fond of that. Nevertheless, she pushed through and soon, she was padding to the moonstone. With a nod to Wolfstar, Wasppaw laid down and pressed her nose to the cool stone.

"Don't like the claustrophobic tunnels either, huh?" Came the bark of laughter that greeted Wasppaw when she finally opened her eyes. "Can't say I blame you, and the moonstone... Well, speaking with the ancestors isn't much better, I'm afraid." As irreverent in death as she was in life, but would anyone honestly expect less?

"My name is Beechfang, I was a Skyclan warrior before your time. Medicine cat and exile too, though my daughters brought me back to the clan. Might have saved them some trouble if they hadn't... But family has always mattered in Skyclan, smart decisions or not. I was killed in battle a season or so before your birth. Your father Harespring was my last apprentice, you can tell him I'm watching out for him." Her apprentices had been a varied bunch, for sure, but Harespring had probably been her favorite of them.

"Anyways... I'm here to offer advice. Not many cats listened to me in life so I'm not sure how well that will go over in death sooo... If you have any particular questions, ask away."

Wasppaw cocked her head, a small smile crossing her face. She liked this StarClan cat. Her eyes flickered when she mentioned exile - what did this warrior do to be still exiled and not only brought back to the clan but reside in StarClan? As far as she knew, only killers or treasonous cats got exiled. Maybe a forbidden relationship. But she supposed that it would be rude to ask, even though she usually never held her tongue, now felt like a good time.

"How do you handle siblings?" she shifted. The tension wasn't obvious, but it was there. Wasppaw had a sharp tongue, but it always came with a wink or a nudge and never truly had malicious intent. Her brother, Foxpaw seemed like... an actual bully. It concerned her, especially with Otterkit still in the nursery. Things felt weird. "Especially more... aggressive, bully-type ones?" She swallowed, her mismatched eyes taking in this strong warrior.

"Sibling drama, hmm?" There was a million things Beechfang could have said in answer to that question. A million, loaded things. "My relationship with some of my own siblings was... Not the best. Perhaps I can give you pointers of what not to do." Like not trying to kill each other, for one... Being nicer, recognizing the important things in life instead of focusing on what had started as a petty rivalry.

"Matching hostility with hostility will only make things worse. I know that from experience. There will be times where you don't understand why a cat acts the way they do and cannot fathom how you could understand them. A little empathy - trying to understand despite that, might go a long way. I wish my parents had guided me rather than ignore the issues that were under their paws." She said after another moment of thought.

"My brother and I once tried to kill each other over what had once been petty squabbled turned into something greater. Two of my kits wound up actually killing each other, the reason for which I'm still not... Entirely clear on. Just as I had wished my own parents hadn't ignored it, I wasn't present enough in my own kits' lives to steer them on a better path. I missed the jealousy, the bitterness over how quickly one rose through the ranks and one didn't. It festered, and even after Trufflesnap had left the clan she still wasn't happy. It ended in one of Birdstar's lives being taken and Trufflesnap's life taken in turn for the crime." Beechfang shook her head.

"I don't know what troubles you and your sibling, but never let it fester. Infection kills, Wasppaw, as surely as claws and fangs can kill. Some cats won't be receptive to talking or hashing out their differences, but you will never know if that is the case until you try to do so."

Wasppaw was sucked into Beechfang's retelling of her life, the rich story of tradgedy and loss but also the words of wisdom laced into the speech. It all sunk into her chest like a rock. Should she tell her father about Foxpaw's behavior? Or was it up to her to save her family? Her ears pricked at the mention of Birdstar, but with the weight of the conversation she couldn't quite put a paw on why. Beechfang finished and Wasppaw slowly let out a breath.

"My brother and I have always had a rivalry. He was made a warrior first, but when I got my Moonstone first, I was gloating to myself even on the way here. But it doesn't seem to matter so much now." She flattened her ears and almost winced as she finished her thought. "Maybe I should just tell Wolfstar to make Foxpaw a warrior first. Because I know I could drop my jealousy, but I don't know if he could drop his. I... don't want him to kill me." Would Foxpaw really go that far? I'm sure Birdstar thought the same thing about this Trufflesnap. Something broke in her chest and a tiny part of her felt a seed of mistrust plant itself there. Swallowing, Wasppaw ventured one last question.

"Can you watch us train up in StarClan? Do you think I'm good enough now to be leader one day?" It felt like such a foolish question to follow up the last one, but Beechfang was so smart she wanted to cling to this time in the stars. She didn't want to leave yet.

A frown settled onto the Starclanner's face at the apprentice's words. "I'd like to say that no cat should be capable of killing their own kin... But that would make me a liar." Had she lied about... certain things before? Yes. But not about that. Or the circumstances surrounding those thoughts. It wasn't even just her, their family had been mired in such for generations. Tinystar, Bloodstrike, her and Dawnhawk... Her own kits, even. Were they all just doomed to repeat the same mistakes, over and over and over?

"Who leaves the nursery first, who goes to the moonstone first... How quickly one progresses in their training matters very little, in the grand scheme of things. I've seen cats who were seasons older than their apprentice denmates finally make it to warrior, good cats. I've seen those who flew through their training be mediocre warriors in turn. It took me a long time to understand that, myself." Green eyes turned toward the surrounding trees in thought for a couple moments. "Have you talked to him at all? How do your interactions usually go? Do you ignore the jealousy or feed into it, unwitting as you might be?" She asked, yellow-green eyes turning back toward Wasppaw, "Don't take relationships with your siblings for granted. That's the one thing I wish I hadn't done. As for navigating interactions with your siblings... It's hard. Knowing what they might do, how they might react to what you do, is harder. Look back on it moons later, and there will always be something you could have done or said differently. Dwelling on it won't do you any good after the fact." She had spent seasons wrapped in that bitter regret. "Being mindful in the moment is difficult, it's not something I learned until I was much older than you are now."

The subject change was so abrupt that Beechfang had to fight not to laugh. "I'd rather participate in the training than watch... Watching just reminds me that I'm stuck up here until some poor apprentice comes calling." She said, "Being a leader is seldom about how one does as an apprentice, I've found. It is far more than hunting and fighting and patrolling. It's impossible to say who can do well at the role, who leads their clan to prosperity and who crumbles under the pressure of that responsibility. Often the cats who think they want the responsibility turn out to be the least suited for it... Or don't expect the challenges that it can bring."

"I've seen leadership change with the weather, and I've seen it last for seasons. To know what will happen and who can take it is impossible. Don't drive yourself insane by thinking too hard on it."

Wasppaw sat back and reflected. Everything Beechface was saying was hitting her hard in her heart. The competition with Foxpaw, not seeing Otterkit enough, it made her sit back and reflect. A lot of apprentices were saying that their Moonstones was meaningless, but she didn't feel that way at all. It stung a little, not hearing Beechfang immediately say she was the next leader in line, but what Beechfang said made sense, and she should accept it. Could accept it, really. It all tied hand in hand with Beechfang's familial advice.

The vision started to get blurry, but Wasppaw wasn't ready. The she-cat before her felt like family already and she wished she was alive so she could hear endless wisdom from her. Before it faded out too much, Wasppaw ran up to Beechfang and touched her nose to her starry shoulder out of respect before stepping away and bowing her head.

"Thank you, Beechfang, I will never forget this." Wasppaw said with the most amount of sincerity she's ever had in her voice.

The vision began to fade faster and as she watched the cat disappear, it all started to connect. Birdstar was Wolfstar's sister. That meant that Trufflesnap was Wolfstar's sister. Of all of those sisters were sisters, then that meant that Beechfang was Wolfstar's mother. That meant that Beechfang was her great grandmother....

"Wait!" Wasppaw said with a start, jumping up and finding herself by the Moonstone. With a sigh, she sat down and contemplated for a few seconds before drawing her gaze to where Wolfstar laid.

"Wolfstar, I met your mother." She said with a grin, crossing the distance between them. "I love her. I want to be just like her one day." Sitting next to the leader, Wasppaw decided to keep the story of her sisters the StarClan Cat had told her to herself for now.

"I want you to make Foxpaw a warrior before me. Even if it's a day later." She paused. "Even though I'm ready now, I can hold out for a bit." She added in with a sly grin. "If I was made warrior first, he'd never forget that and-" stopping before she could finish her sentence, Wasppaw looked away.

Their time was growing short, and Beechfang's tail lashed once in disapproval. They couldn't just let her talk with the apprentice? Offer a bit more advice? Let her connect with one of her descendants a little more? Bah.

Still, she dipped her head to Wasppaw, watching as she faded from view. She would awaken and head back to camp with Wolfstar, hopefully with a better idea of how to handle things. Beechfang, for her part, would return to roaming the starry forests. Perhaps she'd find Dovefrost or Mossbloom to spend time with.

---

"I'm here, Wasppaw. You good?" Wolfstar had been lightly dozing, though true sleep was hard for the she-cat to find away from camp. The sudden movement was enough to make her jump a little, the stillness of the cavern around them broken.

Her mother? Oh stars... "I can only imagine what she must've lectured you about." Wolfstar's whiskers twitched, "She's... Opinionated." And she missed her terribly, even with everything that had happened.

The leader studied Wasppaw's face at the request, a flicker of surprise in her eyes. "You are more than ready, I think. But if you wish to wait, I think you are just as capable of making that decision as I would be." She mewed after a moment, as taken aback by the request as she was curious... And concerned, "What's this about, Wasp?"

Wasppaw took a moment to still herself, finding comfort in Wolfstar's presence. A mother figure, if you will, one Wasppaw didn't have otherwise. She was her grandmother, after all. The confirmation that even Wolfstar thought her as ready did instil a flicker of hope in her chest.

"She told me about Birdstar and Trufflesnap. She also said her and her brother tried to kill each other." She paused, genuine fear in her eyes as she stared up at Wolfstar in the dim glow. "It's in our family. I don't want Foxpaw to try to kill me over something as silly as being the first warrior. I know I would never kill him, so this is the best way to ensure that." Her voice wavered slightly as she finally looked away.

Wolfstar's ears flattened at the mention of Bird and Truffle. Her own sisters... The memory of finding Birdstar near the Thunderclan border, and of what had followed was unpleasant, to say the least.

"You aren't the first cat to think that about this family." She muttered sourly, "I couldn't prevent my sisters from their fate. Trufflesnap tried to bring me down with her, too." She spat, tail lashing once at the ugly reminders. Then there was Dawnhawk and Beechfang... Falconmoon's terrible nightmares came to mind. But he wasn't that cat anymore. He tried so hard not to be his own cat, to be good. And now Wasppaw told her that their kin held the same tendencies, or at least she seemed to think so. Her mind flashed to Shatteredsky, who had been so vocal, so open with his threats. He at least, had not been able to make those threats a reality.

She would put a stop to this somehow, she had to. For her family's sake. "I haven't been as close with you or your siblings as I'd like, if I'm being honest." She mewed softly, "I ought to start paying more attention. Do you truly think that jealousy runs so deep for Foxpaw? I want to believe that simple jealousy couldn't be it..." But Trufflesnap had proved that it could be, after all. She wanted desperately to not believe Wasppaw's words at all, but it seemed that perhaps this family truly did have something wrong with it.