contemptus mundi [closed]

Birdstar

Wolfcall might have been right, when he'd set off to find SkyClan a new home like Beechfang said. For the missing Clanmates they found in these familiar lands, Birdstar was beginning to wonder if it wasn't a sign to remain here. Once they were all healthy and leaf-bare passed, these lands would surely flourish. StarClan could reach them here, even with no conduit. There seemed no reason to make the perilous journey back. For graves and rites and home, all of which she desperately missed, but... it was nonsensical. Nothing was anymore. Birdstar didn't know if the routine fever had burnt parts of her brain away or if things had always been so... difficult.

Approaching pawsteps made her ears twitch, and Birdstar looked up as she was pulled from her thoughts. One of the many cats persistently on her mind: Briarthorn. Birdstar's expression grew tight looking up at the molly. There was a dismal urge still to deflect to her as Briarstar, even after so many seasons removed from that rank, from Clan life as a whole. Birdstar only wanted someone smarter, more capable to stand in her place. Sighing softly, she nodded and pushed herself upright, remaining where she was so as to respect the distance Briarthorn set between them.

"I'm alright now," she assured. Her voice rattled around her ribs, but she had a moment of reprieve from the fever, so she would consider the congestion and periodic dizziness well. "I almost regret having you return," Birdstar said with a huff. "I'm grateful Wolf found you, but during--" A fit of coughs seized her, and Birdstar didn't bother to finish her sentence when it passed. She just gave another rough, punched-out sigh and lowered her head. "... Tell me what you're thinking, Briarthorn. I imagine you're regretting your choice in deputy."