Our Twisted Fate, Time Will Tell [Falconmoon]

A low hiss escaped the ragged she-cat as the bird fluttered out of reach, though Beechfang resisted the urge to lash her tail in frustration. There was no point, and wasting energy on such was pointless. What little energy she had was used for hunting, or trying to. She had known harsh leafbare and greenleafs that were nearly as harsh, but seldom could Beechfang recall being this hungry, this physically tired. With slumped shoulders, the warrior stood, gazing after the starling with longing. The sight of those gold-edged black feathers reminded her of Dawnfeather, and the missed catch was a reminder that she needed to be better than this.

She had been spending more time out in the forest lately, seldom seen among camp except for the nighttime hours. Hunting was necessary, however unsuccessful the attempt, and stalking through Skyclan's rocky, cold forest was better than sitting in camp and dwelling on everything that plagued her mind. Not that hunting was a true distraction, of course, but Beechfang liked to pretend it was. At least out here, she was avoiding the sight of the medicine den, cleaned of bloodstains that she swore she could still see if she closed her eyes. Or Spottedfrog, frail and lonely in the elder's den. And being out in the forest meant it was easier to avoid cats she wished to not speak to. Or claw the pelt off of. She couldn't decide which. But avoiding seemed like the safer option. For their pelts, if not sanity.

With the starling out of sight, Beechfang turned, studying the great ridge and the distant fenceline that marked the twolegplace border. There had to be prey hiding among the rocky crevices, something that was enough to make a meal out of. But the prey seemed more elusive now than ever, and with Skyclan's fresh kill pile so dismal, her energy to actively pursue hunting without distraction from her own thoughts was reaching an all-time low.

Falconmoon had been laying on a branch high up above Beechfang and the forest floor below. Even after all of this time, he could still hide like a hawk on a branch. He looked nothing more than a clump of snow, though the rest of the forest had yet to see much at all, if any. He hadn't had luck with hunting either, though he'd been trying for a majority of the day. There was just... nothing left. He wasn't a stranger to harsh times, his memories of the fire that ravaged Skyclan's territory still in his head, however faded at this point. For a few moments, Falconmoon debated just staying quiet and allowing his sibling from his previous life pass by without interaction. But he couldn't. He'd been silent and avoidant ever since Bloodstrike's death.

If there weren't more pressing matters, like starving, to address, he might have been content to stay hidden longer. Falconmoon sighed, not caring if Beechfang heard him or not. He was about to break the silence one way or another.

"You could always jump, you know. End it all." He spoke, the voice of Dawnhawk coming through the young tom that shared most of his previous life's appearance. Falconmoon, the cat he was before he remembered who he was, had all but faded into this more calm, mild version of the cat that once lead the Dark Forest.

"I can't imagine after everything that has happened, you haven't considered it." He wasn't even hiding it anymore. Not to those who were certain of his true identity, at least. He'd be speaking with Wolfblossom and Birdstar sometime soon. He was done pretending to be someone he wasn't. His fears of rejection and a repeat of what had happened to him over and over a lifetime ago had been mostly quelled, especially given the circumstances and the clan's hunger. Maybe it was because of hunger that he was no longer thinking clearly.

The tom shuffled on the branch, folding one forelimb over the other and adjusting his feathery tail from one side of the branch to the other. He then awaited Beechfang's response... or retort, more than likely.

If she hadn't been so exhausted and starved, Dawnhawk - Falconmoon - whatever's voice from above would have made her jump. As it was though, her head simply lifted to glare at the menace in the tree above. "After you." She responded. He sounded so much like Dawnhawk when he spoke... How could anyone possibly believe him to be anything but?

A low snort escaped the tabby at his question. "Being hit with lightning will make you think a lot of things. Spite's a good motivator." She shrugged. She hadn't let Starclan take her, she wasn't going to let Dawnhawk kill her either, not without a fight. If she was lucky, she could drag him to the dark forest where they both belonged.

"Why are you here, Dawnhawk?" A question he could answer in so many different ways it made her dizzy, not that she expected an answer. She didn't understand how her brother had twisted himself into this so-called Falconmoon, into her supposed grandson. Hearing him speak, Bloodstrike... There was no longer any doubt within Beechfang's mind of who the tom was. She had sat with the thought and avoided him, but being in the same clan that would never have lasted for so long unless he'd also been avoiding her. And now he was in front of her... Instead of unsheathing her claws, the tired warrior sat, tail tip twitching.

Today... Today she might get answers. Or she'd finally wind up dead as she had told Birdstar she would so long ago.

His blue eyes were unblinking, studying her from atop his high perch. He had no remark, no retort, for her comment about lightning or spite. He wouldn't have been surprised if she ended the conversation there and went elsewhere. He probably would have, if he were in her paws. They had a long history, so familiar and yet so distant, like a dream.

"Why are you here, Dawnhawk?"

His pupils constricted as his adrenaline jumped, albeit for a brief moment, before he calmed and his pupils expanded back to where they were a moment before. For a few heartbeats he didn't answer... he considered not answering at all. Sure, she knew who he was, but did he have to acknowledge that she knew? Yes, A voice inside of him decided for him. It is time for this charade to end. He drew a deep breath and exhaled slowly, releasing all of the tension built up in his body. Interactions with his sister had rarely been easy, but he did remember that when he went by Dawnhawk, or Klaus, that he could handle himself far easier. But now... now that he wanted to turn over a new leaf and live life as a better cat...

She actually scared him a little bit. The fear that she would follow the same pattern that she always had and push him to the point of being his worst, the fear that she would successfully ruin any attempt he had at being Falconmoon, was at the forefront of his mind and itching at his claws sheathed behind his toes.

"Dawnhawk is here because Starclan allowed him to be." He began slowly and cautiously. "Falconmoon is here because he is hungry. Why are we here? We don't know yet. We'd like to think that we want to be better than we were before. We are trying." He'd let her consider that for a moment. He didn't know if he should continue, but in the end he decided that he would. "I've had no desire to kill anyone since I realized who I was... Okay fine... not anyone in Skyclan. But I won't. I know the turmoil I would put Skyclan in if I did... and fox it all... I actually care about the clan this time." He paused before a small half smile appeared on his face, hoping to lighten the mood a bit.

"It's... very confusing for me."

For several moments, the tom didn't answer. Beechfang hadn't really expected him to, why would he after everything? On the very slim off chance he wasn't Dawnhawk, then he'd just think she was crazy. Or perhaps the young tom would be in denial and still think her insane. Perhaps she was.

He finally spoke. The stars had... allowed this? "The stars aren't exactly the brightest bunch." Blasphemous? Yes. Did she care? Not at all. Dawnhawk, or Falconmoon? continued, and Beechfang merely nodded. Hardly an acceptable answer as to why Dawnhawk was here, but Beechfang figured that was all she was going to get. The tom continued, and it was on the tip of her tongue to say something snide as the golden tom mentioned having no desire to kill Skyclan cats. Probably only because she had been the one to dirty her paws for the last two he'd so desperately wanted dead in his, what, former? life? It wouldn't be fair to Falconmoon, she thought, and Bloodstrike's demise wasn't entirely Dawnhawk's fault, with how that fox had savaged him. Beechfang took a slow breath and exhaled. For Wolfblossom's sake, she would not antagonize him. For Falconmoon's sake, however much of the tom in front of her was really Falconmoon and not this twisted ghost from the past. "I think Dawnhawk and I have killed enough cats in cold blood between us to recognize when it's not worth it." She mewed slowly, Cloverheart's face on her mind, haunting as it always was.

"I don't know why you've been given a second chance, if this isn't some elaborate scheme. I'm not sure why our leadership gave me one, either." The easy answer was that she was their mother, of course. And Dawnhawk had somehow wormed his way into her family. Wolfblossom's conviction, her love for her kits, even this golden headcase... It was a test. One that Beechfang wasn't sure she would fail in one moment of ill-advised fury. It would be so easy to kill him now, to rid the forest of the monster it didn't even know walked again. She wouldn't be long in following him to the dark forest, if Wolfblossom's belief was as strong as Beechfang thought it was. The deputy seemed to hold family above all, and Falconmoon was her son. As much as she had thought about killing Dawnhawk - dreamed of it when he'd terrorized the forest, Beechfang too had been offered that second chance to be in Skyclan. She wasn't sure if she could betray that trust placed in her. Wolfblossom would put her down like the rabid beast she was, no matter how it killed the deputy inside to do so. Her parents, her siblings, her own kits had taken each other's lives, even. This was not a cycle that needed to repeat.

Falconmoon seemed genuine in his response. If this was truly some scheme, he was hiding it too well. She would have liked to believe it wasn't, if only for her own sanity. In the end, maybe the why of it didn't really matter. He was here, walking among the living. Falconmoon held his memories somehow, or Dawnhawk was speaking through him... Or they were one and the same. No matter how the situation was cut, it seemed like his confusion ran just as deep as her own. "It is." He was right, and she wasn't the one with someone else's thoughts in her head. "Every time I think I have my head wrapped around this, whatever this is..." Beechfang shook her head, "And I thought speaking with Starclan themselves was frustrating and confusing. You've outdone them, I think."

The tom surprised himself with his inward cringe at the mention of the stars being stupid, more or less. That part definitely wasn't Dawnhawk... right? Falconmoon had cared about them, even when he was frustrated with them from time to time. He had respect for them, at bare minimum. Before he could wrap his mind around the moment of confusion, Beechfang had moved on and was speaking again. Whether or not it was worth killing someone in cold blood wasn't something Falconmoon thought about. Maybe the world would be better off without some cats, but if he'd been given a second chance, shouldn't everyone else?

"We're a family of killers. The new Skyclan leadership just doesn't know it yet. The time will come, as it does for everyone, where Birdstar and Wolfblossom will have to make the hard decision to end a life, or bare the consequences of their mercy." That time it absolutely wasn't Falconmoon talking. Even calling his mother by her name still felt wrong, almost enough to give him pause. Still, as he spoke the line, his eyes were cold and hard.

However, they softened and he chuckled at the mention of outdoing Starclan in their cryptic-ness. "That certainly was never my goal. I was sent back because enough cats in Starclan felt sorry for me. There were plenty that didn't too though. There was a whole trial and everything. Starclan isn't the hive mind they want us to believe that they are." How did that help their situation now? It didn't really, but Falconmoon wasn't sure what else to do except pull out the "fun fact" cards.

"So what's your plan if Skyclan goes to war with Riverclan over you? Personally I think you should stay... and I actually would fight to keep you with us. But I still want to know what your own plan is." Maybe he could help? Or maybe this was simply a way to distract himself from the confusing mess that was his own mind.

"We are." There was no point in arguing it when it was true. "They handled Trufflesnap well enough-" What a thing to say about her own daughter, but it seemed even her siblings hadn't really known the she-cat at all. "It won't be the first or last time a hard decision needs to be made, or one cat sacrificed to keep the rest safe." That didn't mean they had to like it, but the forest had a way of bringing out the worst of Skyclan and their family. That peace had lasted this long was a miracle, itself.

"A trial, you're serious?" She wondered just who had stuck up for Dawnhawk, of all cats, knowing the carnage he caused. Blossomstep, maybe.. Their grandmother had always saw the best in them, even if neither cat deserved it. But who else?

"Too many of the cats I care about are there for me to believe they truly are a hivemind. Still, the power they hold and choose to use only when it suits one goal or another..." The warrior shrugged. That she held disdain for Starclan was no secret, but each good cat she knew was up there made her thoughts waver and fueled her uncertainty. "There's two cats I know who would ever think of defending you and one of them was still alive when you... Falconmoon... were born." Foxing strange situation this was, it made her head hurt. Or maybe it was the lack of food.

Her ears slid back at the mention of Riverclan, "I swore to myself I wasn't going to make things difficult for Birdstar's leadership. The first few moons I was back here, I kept waiting for the other foot to fall. Bloodstrike too. I don't ever remember Skyclan being so... so peaceful." Maybe for a short time when she had still been a kit, but the fire had taken care of that. "I was convinced I'd be dead within the week of returning, honestly. Or wake up in that abandoned nest again." She didn't think she needed to say why her paranoia was so high, Dawnhawk would know how he fueled it.

"Lying to their alliance won't last forever, but my kits were the ones to ask me to come home. They knew the risk and accepted it, so did I, foolish as that might be." Bloodstrike, Ravenclaw and Dawnfeather too. Despite everything they had wanted her here. She'd had her misgivings, told Birdstar as much... But she couldn't deny her family that. Not after having her family ripped away from her and forced to watch from the sidelines a second time as they grew into warriors. There would not be a third. "I don't plan on going anywhere, if Riverclan finds out about me." Birdstar's warning of Falconmoon's oddities hadn't been enough to make her turn away from the clan, despite her paranoia. Riverclan's wrath would not do so either.

"What will you do if the forest finds out that Falconmoon isn't just Falconmoon? Or the rest of the clan?" Beechfang wasn't sure how many in the clan knew about Falconmoon's problems beyond Birdstar and Wolfblossom. Bloodstrike had been just as paranoid as his daughter, but he was a non-issue. "I imagine not many that remember you do so fondly." The tom looked, sounded and even acted like Dawnhawk had in his previous life, but would anyone outside of those he was closest to recognize it?

"I don't ever remember Skyclan being so... so peaceful."

"It's... been weird." He agreed, though he didn't have much to say about anything else she said before that. He had been just watching and listening, pleasantly surprised that things were going the way that they were. Maybe she was just old and tired of the fighting. Falconmoon had been in his previous life a few times too, but at that point, the battles were choosing him, not the other way around.

"I don't plan on going anywhere, if Riverclan finds out about me." With that statement, Falconmoon nodded at her once, slowly, but even as he did, he knew when that time came, and come it would, he would have a very big decision to make. He wasn't sure that he was ready for it... though a big part of him actually did want Beechfang around. He couldn't tell this time if it was Dawnhawk or Falconmoon that wanted this, but he was willing to just accept that he would prefer her in the clan for one reason or another. No need to make any more complicated situations since he still had his own identity crisis to deal with.

"What will you do if the forest finds out that Falconmoon isn't just Falconmoon? Or the rest of the clan? I imagine not many that remember you do so fondly." And there it is. Falconmoon stood up from his perch and slowly, non-threateningly, began to make his way down. He weaved through the bare branches as smoothly and fluidly as a snake with the deft, practiced paws of a squirrel. When he got to the lowest branch however, Falconmoon halted his descent, content to still be a bit above where Beechfang currently resided on the ground... just for a bit longer. Things had been going well so far. It was probably due for a change of tone, as it usually was with his... sister... It was still foreign to think of her that way, but grandmother didn't sit well with him either.

"Well... I haven't gotten that far. I don't think it's up to me really, is it? My mom... Wolfblossom wouldn't send me away. I don't know what Birdstar would do. I think the best course of action for me as well as the clan, would be to tell Birdstar and mom who I really am and let them decide before the rest of the clan finds out. Once the clan finds out, I have no doubts word will spread to the other clans no matter how hard we try to keep everything hush hush. Secrets have a way of getting out." He stared at her intently for just a moment before continuing. "I obviously have an interest in my own self preservation... which naturally is in conflict with the survival of Skyclan. Story of my life... or lives now. If Birdstar and Wolfblossom want me to stay despite other clans finding out I have made a not so triumphant return... then I will fight to the death to remain here and serve Skyclan to the best of my ability. If leadership asks me to go... I will go." His face fell just a bit... and there was even a brief flash of fear in the tom's bright blue eyes before it vanished behind steely determination. "It wouldn't be the first time I've had to live as a rogue." And yet... it would be. His memories of being Dawnhawk were there... but he wouldn't call all of his memories crystal clear. He hoped his past life's experience would help him survive, but he wouldn't know what he remembered until he was put in situations to recall them.

"You're handling this surprisingly well, I admit. I almost wonder if you're trying to lure me into a false sense of security before you rip my throat out. I guess I couldn't blame you, but I do mean what I say. I want to be better this time." Falconmoon had his struggles... his bursts of rage that seemed to come out of nowhere sometimes was one of them. The fact that he had strong attachments to members of Thunderclan because they were his kits was something he struggled to fully wrap his head around. With his last statement, he watched Beechfang carefully to note any and all reaction to what was being said.

"Don't." Beechfang let out a low growl, shifting away out of reflexive instinct as Dawnhawk dropped into the branches just above her. It had been a long time, but she remembered when she had taken up the task of performing ceremonies under the Asylum's rule, and she had not forgotten him looming in the trees above her. With the rest of their fighting and then being struck by lightning, well, she was far from the typical Skyclanner. Being wary of the trees and what lurked in them was second nature.

Indeed, secrets had a way of getting out, their existence within the clans wouldn't be so secret, given enough time. It was only a matter of time, and how. The stars, a border encounter, loose lips... It didn't matter how, really, because it would happen, eventually. "Hiding one fugitive from the other clans for much longer will be impossible. I think our leadership is insane enough to try it. They're doing so for me... What's one more?" Being the mother of said leadership probably predisposed them to insanity. That this golden warrior was Wolfblossom's son... Beechfang had a suspicion the deputy would not agree to anyone who thought he was a threat. "I think it's foolish... But I wasn't going to tell my daughters 'no.' You, at least, they believe were born a completely different cat. One who hasn't committed murder and slaughtered indiscriminately."

Falconmoon's next words drew sharp, derisive laughter from the scarred tabby. She was handling this well? "You... are delusional. Or truly haven't been paying attention. When have I handled anything well?" She asked, then sighed. "I've thought about it. More than once. I never thought we were rid of you fully, of course, but seeing a kit that looked and sounded just like Dawnhawk, and then meeting you in twolegplace... And you had memories of something no other living cat but me should have..." Beechfang gave her head a rough shake. "You should be dead, but Falconmoon was still Wolfblossom's kit, wasn't he?"

"I wanted to be better, after the dark forest, and Cloverheart. To not leap with claws first. That's caused enough trouble over the years and I'm tired of causing it. It's... difficult. I'm trying." It helped somewhat, that her kits had held her to that, to this point. Or mostly did.

Finally, she muttered, "We have similar goals... Actually sickening, Dawnhawk." What was the world coming to?

Falconmoon blinked at Beechfang's reaction to his approach, but said nothing. He knew the she-cat was wary of him, and she had good reason. At one point. He wasn't going to comment on it, but instead let the conversation move forward. He found himself patiently listening, picking up on the frustration and ear behind Beechfang's words. He couldn't blame her. Once she had finally finished, Falconmoon chose his next words carefully.

"We both want to do better... and I admit I do have my struggles from time to time. So far so good, but success is more likely if you don't have to do it alone. Maybe we should help each other this time. I'll be your voice of reason when reason eludes you, and you do the same for me. Let's give this a try and act like the siblings we should have been to each other from the start." He would have offered his hand, had he been human, but instead he could only wait on the branch, respectfully giving Beechfang the space she felt she needed. It was a long shot, but if she was serious about doing better, this could be a potential turning point. At the same time... how could he blame her for being wary and untrusting of him?

Dawnmoon didn't leap at her, and didn't move closer. Beechfang was still wary, but some of the tension slipped from her shoulders. He spoke, and she listened quietly to the suggestion. Working together... It sounded absolutely ridiculous, but then this entire situation was ridiculous to begin with. She was almost tempted to decline, but what good would that really do for her? Or either of them? For once, their goal of survival aligned with each other's. Each of them were trying to change, to be better than they had been.

Maybe it would be better this way. To keep an eye on him. To prevent him from turning into Dawnhawk the second in truth. Helping each other seemed... beneficial, as strange as that thought was after so long.

"...Alright." She said slowly, It felt so strange to place her trust in him like this. "I'm... Willing to try, at least. For us, for the clan. I don't think I've wrapped my head around calling you sibling... Maybe we'll get there." Maybe pigs would fly. Her daughters had put in a lot of effort to salvage Skyclan's reputation, for however long that would last. Beechfang expected they would be around to see it crumble if their true nature were found out... But they didn't have to turn to their old ways of fighting and killing at the first chance, either. Perhaps more for Falconmoon than herself, there was something to salvage. "We've gone this long without trying to kill each other... Maybe we can pull this off." She didn't want to be too optimistic about this, but it was worth the try. He was right that their goals of survival and not falling back into their old ways would be better accomplished with help.

"We are going to look like lunatics if we ever have to explain this to Wolfblossom, I hope you realize that."