Regrets and Promises [solo]

Sprucebark lay in the med den.  His body was so exhausted from the recent events.  Being washed out by the river, the long hike back with Hawk.  The being chased by twolegs and watching his brother get stuffed into a box.  The fainting at 4trees from total exhaution and having to be carried back to camp by Hawk again.  It was just too much all of it too much.  

His head pounded and he closed his eyes shut tight just wanting the pain to go away.  He missed his brother so much, he regrated all the arguments that they had which now seemed so pointless.   He wished he could have told Rowanpaw himself how much he did care for him, that he didnt want any of this to happen, that he was sorry for not being more careful and being swept out like that, sorry for letting Rowan be captured. And what all this had come too.

He was able to get some rest in.  When he awoke he felt somewhat better.  He was tired of being trapped in the med den.  He wanted to go see the forest and think by the river, the place that comforted him so much.  

He told Sandy that he was going out, his tone left no place for renegotiations.  Not a harsh tone or anything or the sort... moreso an exhausted one broken and needing to be alone for a bit.  

He shuffled to the river slowly and without much of a direction of exactly where he was going.  He sat by the waters edge looking down at his own reflection.  Im sorry I wasnt able to save you.  My whole life I followed the rules so close thinking that starclan would reward me somehow.


He hung his head low
"it doesnt feel like that much at all right now

(OOC: this is a solo topic but in case riverclan's rules state that warriors have to go with someone else, Im reserving the right to say that some npc tagged along with him, This is due to the fact that Sprucebark does not break any rules no matter how small the rule might be... i just dunno what the rules are for rc right now)

((NPC clanmate is doing like nothing in the topic though they are just kinda there and they are there only if thats what riverclans rules were at this time))


He watched the water flow by for a long while just thinking to himself.  Reed was gone...Olive was gone... and now so too was Rowan.  How many siblings could he lose?  He wouldn't lose any more that was for sure.  Mink and sandy were not going anywhere on his watch.

"I promise... I will protect them both... no matter what