A Night Spent Together [C]

The last thing he remembered were claws tearing into his throat as blood bubbled up from the wound. And then there was nothingness. Time was unending, and swift, all in one fluid motion. Flashes of dreams swam through his mind. There were odds and ends of memories but mostly a familiar pelt - Poppyshine. Despite the faraway agony, her presence centered him and calmed him when the dreams became fitful. Recovering from a near death experience had proven to be an exhausting endeavor.

Rushtalon's eyes flickered open, squinting against the frail light. At first the scene was fuzzy and unclear, like one of the many dreams, surreal, "Beautiful..." He muttered in a hoarse rasp, seeing the way the pale light of the stars reflected on the white fur of her pelt. She looked as dazzling as one of the Starclan cats that had padded through the camp. Blinking a couple times, the warrior slowly began to digest that this wasn't just another dream. It was real. Poppyheart was here with him.

Realizing he'd muttered aloud, the russet tom woke up at once, the tendrils of sleep at the fringes of his mind instantly tugged away. Rushtalon jolted awake and sideways into the wall with a groan before falling flat into the nest once again. Everything hurt. He wasn't sure he could move far now knowing the extents of the pain. Mostly, his whole pelt felts stiff. Maybe it would be better to stretch his legs or... Poppyshine. His thought flashed back to her and his eyes flitted to her frame once again, "You're really here." Although the words were frail and crackled, a faint and dreamy smile crossed his maw.

His eyes closed slightly, soothed by the rhythmic licks of Poppyshine's tongue. It was almost tempting to slip back into a more peaceful sleep with the sensation. However, a greater inclination was at the forefront of his mind - to stay here in this moment with Poppyshine. After all, hadn't his stupid and impulsive decision been mostly for her? Of course, Rushtalon had been influenced by a care for his kin and clan but it had been the calico she-cat whose image that flashed in his head during those final moments before he'd gone unconscious. Clearly it had stuck with him, even now.

The tom's maw had opened slightly to speak but her chastising questions cut through the air before he could. Ears fell slightly in embarrassment. Of course it was reckless, he knew that, but it had seemed like the best option at the time. Raw pain lined his heart and coupled with the helplessness that he had felt for moons, the russet tom had felt there was nothing else he could do for her, for them. As she pressed her head to his, he sighed softly, feeling selfish at the way that he relished in her warmth. He wanted to duck his head sheepishly or pull away, finding himself undeserving of such unadulterated care, and yet found himself unable to.

"...I didn't know that you needed me too." Rushtalon said after several heartbeats. The words were soft as if he could hardly bring himself to admit such a thing aloud. It felt ridiculous to feel to small now. He had always wanted to protect and support the she-cat, since getting to know her through the antics of apprenticeship. But he realized now that she had supported him just as much, if not more. His whiskers twitched slightly, an almost mocking humor in the realization of his own ignorance. This was followed by a hefty sigh. His tail flickered. He couldn't find the words, nothing seemed right. How odd it was for such a large warrior to sit here feeling like a kit and longing so desperately to sink into her side.

It centered him, the way she pressed closer instead of pulling away. His maw parted slightly and he breathed in her scent. He remembered the conversation he had with Kitespring and realized how much of a foolish kit he'd been about his own feelings. Still, never in his wildest dreams, did the tom think that he would have such an incredible she-cat here at his sides. Rushtalon pressed back and willed the motion to intertwine their pelts forever. Pulling away had been more comfortable previously, as he wrestled with the idea that her relationship with Owlshriek took precedence and he was little more than a friendly companion himself. But, now, insecurities about the dark-furred warrior didn't even cross his mind.

"I guess," He started, a pensive look crossing his maw as she spoke of loss, "I guess losing cats has been a part of my life since I was young. I didn't really stop to think how it might impact others. I thought I was going to do something useful. I though I could help save you." A low huff of laughter left the sides of his maw, realizing his own stupidity. Darkglow had been gone since birth and he had never stopped to think how losing his mother had impacted him. Life had generally been good. Even amid the trials, there were cats he cared for, cats he loved. And who loved him back. Loss wasn't simply a fact, because the cats who he could lose mattered. Not only that, but he mattered to them as well.

When the sensation of her tongue against his coat stopped quite suddenly, he snapped back to attention. Rushtalon found her gaze and recognized the sadness in the depths. Guilt writhed in his belly and an apology sat behind his own eyes. There was more to say, he couldn't leave it here. He felt melodramatic as he let out another sigh, "It-it's stupid. I saw you and Owlshriek and I just figured, if you had him, that you wouldn't need me. I didn't want to get in the way or do anything to ruin your happiness so I figured it would be best to do what I could to save you and that's all I could do. I bet you think I'm a mousebrain, huh? I mean, I certainly feel like one now."