A Drop of Sweetness [C]

Icepaw

Icepaw sat under one of the many trees of the ShadowClan camp, feeling disconnected from her body. She disconnected often, it felt like. Time passe her by without really noticing and she sometimes found herself staring at nothing at all when she had no training with Thalia. It was not a process that she enjoyed, but it was hard for her to get out of it when she fell into one of her spells. Her soul grew far from her body and she got trapped somewhere that was dark and slow. That voice, that heinous voice, was what kept her company while she was trapped in that faraway place.

What purpose do you really serve her? it hissed in her ear. You aren’t strong enough to protect anyone. You have no skills in hunting. You’re worthless to your clan. Cicadashriek didn’t even think you were worth looking after. It’s laughable to think that you’ll ever become a warrior.

Icepaw’s eyes glazed over as she listened to the voice bombarding her mind, leaving her an open target to anyone who wanted to walk up to her—including any rambunctious kittens in the nursery just a few foxtail-lengths away.

Icepaw

Icepaw was quite literally knocked out of her thoughts when a kit came tumbling right into her. She blinked rapidly and her muscles tensed tightly, ready to lunge at whatever had run into her. As her eyes set on Honeykit and realized that he was not a predator nor a Dark Forest cat, Icepaw forced herself to relax. She took a deep breath and sat herself down. “Hello…Honeykit,” she mewed in a flat voice. Her gaze returned to the nursery and then at Honeykit again. He must be one of the new kits. “You may call me Icepaw. It’s…alright. A lot of kits are hyperactive.” And don’t always look at where they’re going.

She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down entirely again. She ran through his numerous questions again in her head. The ice deep in her chest grew a bit harder at his comment about her becoming an amazing warrior. And battles… “I don’t do…a lot of cool stuff,” she mewed carefully. “I participate in training with my mentor, Thalia. I don’t have much longer before I’m to become a warrior, that’s true.”

Icepaw studied him for a moment. The voice hissed, Are you going to break his spirit already? She closed her eyes and breathed out before she meowed, “You’ll be an apprentice soon enough and learn all of that as well.”

Icepaw

As Honeykit bounded away to leap into the air and snatch a leaf, Icepaw’s gaze jumped around, trying to make sure there were no Dark Forest cats nearby that would get fed up with the kit. When it seemed there were none looking towards him, she returned her gaze to Honeykit, just in time for him to whip back around to face her. She glanced at the now decimated leaf and then back to him. “Good job,” she mewed. “That is very good. So long as you don’t do that to your prey.” She nodded to the leaf that was now in pieces.

Icepaw hesitated. She didn’t want to do this. Honeykit was loud and obnoxious and had too much energy for her weary mind to handle. And yet, before that incessant, judgmental voice in her head could comment, she moved to him anyway.

“You have great energy, but as amazing as your pounce is, you will catch no prey like that,” she explained. “My mentor has been showing me how to creep up on prey. Like this.” She dropped down low to the ground and carefully shuffled forward, moving slowly with each paw deliberately pressing to the ground.

Icepaw

Looking over his form, Icepaw nodded approvingly. Her eyes lingered on his tail, though she didn’t actually say anything about it. So long as his tail was not waving around wildly or making noise by knocking into anything, an excited tail wouldn’t give him away. He was also a kit, still, anyway. Aloud, she meowed, “Good. That’s a good posture, Honeykit.” She pushed herself back up to sitting. “You’ll make a fine apprentice when your six moons are up, and then you’ll make an even finer warrior, I’m sure.”

She hoped that she wasn’t filling him with false confidence. A cautious cat was better than a reckless one. But kits were young and meant to be inexperienced. They didn’t deserve to be exposed to horrors any more than they already were with the Dark Forest cats creeping around.

Icepaw

Her eyes watched Honeykit, as he ran circles around her. She occupied herself by grooming the fur on her paw, so she wouldn’t have to hold his gaze. She paused and meowed, “I am not that good at teaching. I am only repeating what was told by my own mentors. You’ll encounter those that are much better than I am at things like this, Honeykit.” He was a bundle of energy and positivity, and deserved to have someone who could match that for him. She didn’t even know if she would be a warrior, but if she did, then she hoped that no one would entrust her to look after a child like Honeykit.

Icepaw

Icepaw tilted her head as she listened to the kit’s words. There were almost…wise, in a way. Kits had a strange way of obtaining special insight into things that otherwise should be difficult for them to grasp. He didn’t have the full context to what was going on with her, but his words were still a comforting reminder that she could get better and be a good warrior…somehow.

His gaze turned to her tail and she was immediately reminded that no matter how wise he may sound, he was still young and inexperienced. And easily distracted. She moved her tail, tucking it under her back paws. She meowed, “Thank you, Honeykit. I appreciate that.” She paused for a moment and her nose twitched. What…was she supposed to say now?

Icepaw

His offer to play caught Icepaw off guard. She looked at him and his excited wiggling. Kits were so excitable, so full of energy; she didn’t know how they managed. Her stomach churned and she looked around the camp but caught no sight of Thalia or any Dark Forest cats that had taken an interest in her lately. She saw none of them. Perhaps it would be okay, then. She had nothing else to do, and perhaps playing with Honeykit would keep her thoughts from her mind for a while longer.

She looked back to him and nodded. “Alright. What would you like to play, then?” She stood up to her paws and stretched out. She tried to remember what games her fellow kits played when she was his age. There was a lot of chasing, pretending to be warriors, playing leader, reenacting battles that were well-known from the elders’ tales…Whatever Honeykit was in the mood for, she supposed was fine.

Icepaw

Looking at Honeykit, Icepaw gave a soft hum. “You’re really good, are you?” she murmured. That would be good for when he became an apprentice, if it was true. They needed cats that were good at catching prey, especially come leafbare. “Alright. Let’s see how good you are, then.”

Her attention turned towards the nursery. She walked over and ducked in for only a moment to grab one of the unused moss balls that the kits used to play. After returning to Honeykit, she ensured that he was ready to go before she rolled the ball off in one direction for him to go and pounce on.