last night's fake blood [C]

With a soft tremble, the ferns shrouding the medicine den parted, a dark figure rising from the entrance. The den's usual earthy, vaguely sweet smell had been buried under the stench of blood; even as warriors were beginning their recovery and settling back into the routine of their duties, the strong smell remained. Webshadow's nose wrinkled against it as he stepped lightly forward. With all the time he had spent there, he figured he would have gotten used to the smell and stopped recoiling against it; apparently, that wasn't true.

"Frostgaze? Hi," he mewed gently into the darkness. Briefly, his gaze searched the den for the deputy's pelt, and just as quickly as he found a patch of white he dropped his head. He was worried that if he looked at Frostgaze too long, the tom might simply topple over without standing again. Or the gash marking his neck would split back open, and it would stain the floor of the den red. Or–

Webshadow took another soft step forward, attention planted firmly on his own paws as they shuffled through nests of moss. "I wanted to visit you. I don't want to leave you here too long, alone." Dark ears lowered, and the tabby's tail whisked nervously against his flank. Not that Frostgaze would be alone, not with all the other cats that needed treated– thankfully, it looked like they had stepped out for some air for the time being. "I'm happy to keep you company, if you'd like. I want to make sure you are doing well. Or... as well as you can."

Frostgaze had only slept fitfully since the battle against the rogues, a number of wounds having since closed and scabbed. It still hurt though, it hurt like the claws of those rogues were slashing through his fur once again... at least when he moved wrong. His eyes were closed when he heard the noise of someone entering through the ferns, one ear swiveling to the noise. Originally, he assumed it would be one of the less wounded of his clanmates, coming back in after getting some time outside. Yet it was... someone else.

The deputy opened his eyes to the welcome sight of Webshadow. Was that... guilt, was that why he was visiting, not wanting to leave him alone? The real question... did it even matter? "You can come and sit over here if you want," he rasped, "I am still too sore to be moving around without much reason." The pain in his ribs attested to that, though he was still not sure what had happened there. "...You did not have to come see me, though I do appreciate it a great deal. What happened after I was knocked unconscious? I know that it was Dawnhawk, but... you were awake for the end of the battle right?" His tail gently thumped against his nest, curious as always. Maybe he'd have an answer to his sore ribs.

"I understand," Webshadow mumbled as he closed the gap between them. There was a limp to his step, and a tight grimace as he settled down beside Frostgaze. He sat slowly, then after a moment to gather his breath and assure himself his ribs hadn't suddenly broken fully, slowly allowed himself to lay down. Gently, his tail tapped against the deputy's hip; rhythmic, and hopefully comforting. "I didn't have to, true," he turned to properly regard Frostgaze, whiskers twitching as he eyed the deputy. He hadn't turned to rot beside him. Webshadow let out a quiet sigh of relief before adding, "I wanted to, though. I was worried about you." His gaze was steady, searching. Eventually, he dropped his head again altogether.

The question of what happened after the battle made the fur along Webshadow's spine rise. "I was awake, yes. Dawnhawk took that as an invitation to monologue me." He let out a rough snort of amusement, just as quickly regretting it when hot pain flashed through his side. Perhaps it wasn't the time for joking, anyway. "He dragged you over to me and threatened to open your throat then and there... I think he would have turned you into another pelt, and I do not think I could have stopped him. I am grateful he changed his mind." His tail tapped against Frostgaze with a little more force at the idea. With a cough, he willed the agitated beat back into something softer. In favor, his ears twitched and swiveled.

"He told me he would not attack our camp then... but he did give me a warning. Or a piece of advice, either way. He told me that any cat that has pursued him has failed miserably; usually, they have died trying. Dawnhawk claims he's willing to leave ShadowClan as defeated as we were. He said their work was enough to avenge his... son, whatever the poor cat's name was. If ShadowClan pursues him, though, or if more of his family members' bodies turn up, he will return. He will return, and he will come to our camp then, and he will slaughter everyone in sight. Kits, elders, queens– he does not care. None of them do. He has promised to destroy ShadowClan entirely if we even attempt to threaten him."

Webshadow paused, a shuddering breath rolling out of him. He had picked up a vacant, glassy expression as he spoke, but he slowly shook himself back into the present. There was no battlefield anymore, and with luck, there wouldn't be another one so gruesome. "He... also used you as a bit of a nest, during his speech. He made you look very comfortable, for what it's worth." A purr rose in his throat, soft and amused, as he briefly touched his nose to Frostgaze's shoulder. There was nothing funny about the situation– Webshadow had wanted nothing more in that moment to bowl Dawnhawk over and claw his smug grin off for that particular show –and neither had humor ever been his strong suit. They couldn't persist drearily forever, though; some part of him, despite his resigned and dry nature, wondered if a laugh might make the recovery smoother.

After a moment, Webshadow went on, softer this time: "I am sorry, though. That I did not stop him. I am glad you're here now." And he was. Not in the way either of them wanted, but Frostgaze was here: wounded deeply, and perhaps bitter, but here. Alive.

Ice blue eyes watched Webshadow's movements, how he limped, just like half the other warriors in his clan. It was... disheartening to see him in pain. Frostgaze opened his mouth to retort, but couldn't, simply holding Webshadow's gaze until he looked away. They were laying next to each other now, and the deputy appreciated the steady taps against his hip. Perhaps it was just keeping him grounded... maybe he just appreciated Webshadow's company.

Then came the explanation, what Dawnhawk had done after he had gone down. How close he had come to death... how close they all could have come to death. The tom flicked his ear back as he listened, feeling the tapping get harder. Then came the news that he had been a nest to the rogue. That explained his ribs, and it explained how guilty his friend had sounded throughout the entire conversation.

Frostgaze took a breath, despite the soreness, and looked at Webshadow. "I do not blame you, if that is what you think. I-," the deputy stopped speaking for a moment, thinking of the right words before continuing, "I am also glad you are here now. I would always rather take injuries rather than another gaining them, and I would not know what to do if I had been in the situation you had been in. It feels as if it would be... nigh impossible to keep a cool head in a situation like that, I am glad you were uninjured as he monologed." The deputy grimaced as he shifted toward Webshadow, doing his best not to just lean onto the other cat. Softly, he spoke once more. "...I am forced to recognize the fact that I do not simply think of you as another clanmate, Webshadow. I- I do not know what I would do without you. I am sorry for not being strong enough to keep fighting, to protect you, to protect myself. I want you to never have to experience it again."

He didn't know what this was, what was truly beyond simply being friends? They often spent time together, and even if Frostgaze didn't quite always understand emotions, he felt as if this was an emotion he could not avoid. Not when he was around the tom so often. So was this love? He... for once, really didn't know.

"Don't move too much." Webshadow interjected, his meow low and a bit rough as Frostgaze shifted closer. Worry creased the dark warrior's nose at the way the deputy's expression tightened when he did try, but he bit back any other remarks. Frostgaze could handle his own health– no matter how badly Webshadow wanted to mind it for him –and besides, his friend was still speaking, and it sounded important.

Webshadow listened, quiet. His whiskers twitched. Pale eyes searched Frostgaze's face, looking for anything to betray that his companion might have been lying (even if he knew Frostgaze wasn't the type to), and when he found nothing his pelt warmed with pleasant surprise. Suddenly, he felt more brain-addled than he'd grown used to these last few days.

"Frostgaze," he started gently, voice tight. What was he supposed to say to that, really? He wanted to say everything possible to it, but words had never been his forte, especially not now with bees buzzing between his ears. Instead, he gave the deputy's hip a more decisive tap while he considered what next to say. "Don't be sorry. I don't blame you, either. You did everything you could, and you are badly wounded," at that, Webshadow nodded to his neck before continuing, "I wouldn't have asked you for anything more. You are one of the strongest cats I know, I am just glad you're with us– me – now. Hopefully, neither of us will be put in that position again." His own apology sat on his tongue, but something told him Frostgaze wouldn't accept it, and they would pass the evening trading undeserved blame. Instead, he let himself drift off, a steady hum droning from his chest.

For a while, he said nothing more as he mulled over his words. Then a thought struck him, and his ears pricked to attention with the energy of it. "I spoke with Swiftheart recently. She asked how I knew you were 'right for me.' I was a little put off by it, only because I did not realize cats saw us that way. She asked it so matter-of-factly, too, as if the whole Clan knew. It made me wonder how many cats thought like that way. Truthfully... I never put much thought into it." Webshadow hesitated, blinking twice at Frostgaze. Tentatively, and a bit stiffly, the dark tabby placed his chin on Frostgaze's head before he went on speaking. "I told her that you are smart, and a good friend. That I enjoy your company a great deal. You are sharp and kind, and this is... a bit small, in comparison, but I like the way that you talk. It reminds me of myself."

The heat flushed through his fur again, and Webshadow craned himself to press his cheek into the soft fur of Frostgaze's collar, careful to avoid the wounds there. It looked almost like he was hiding, attempting to tuck himself away so he wouldn't have to listen to himself speak. He shifted, unsure what to do with his paws. "Like I said, I've never put much thought into... into things like that. Watching other cats fall over each other has always confused me. I figured it would be a more sudden feeling, like I would wake up one night and decide, suddenly, that I was in love with someone. I think instead it's much more gradual. Very easy to miss if you aren't looking for it, I suppose." A snorted laugh, then a whistling sigh. "You remind me of new-leaf, if that makes sense. Warm, and comfortable; easy to settle into, inviting. I wake up at ease with your presence. Oh, but... I guess I'm just rambling now." Another laugh bubbled out of him, louder and more sincere, and Webshadow parted briefly to shake his head before leaning back into Frostgaze.

Suddenly, something like cold terror clutched his chest. It was the feeling of half-iced mud clinging to his limbs in the early days of leaf-bare, and it sent a shudder coursing through him. His mind whirled, less filled with rattled thoughts of Is this what a confession sounds like?, drifting instead towards, What happens when I agree? How much will things change?, and most frighteningly, What if, somehow, I can't do this right?

The thought of Frostgaze hurt because of him flickered across his mind. His mind drifted back to his parents, to the tension between them, especially at mentions of RiverClan... he thought about how devastated Shira had been over Foxspark's death. Webshadow swallowed thickly, suddenly aware of how quickly his mouth had dried out.

That's a risk I will have to take.

"You're a very special cat to me, Frostgaze. Far more than another Clanmate. I am... I am not sure what that means to you, or what you want it to mean, but I would have to agree. Or- I suppose cats usually say yes now? Whatever I'm meant to say doesn't matter. What does is that you're very dear to me."

Wearily, Webshadow let out a breath he hadn't meant to hold onto. He wanted to say more, fill any potential silence with meaningless words to keep his restless thoughts at bay. He stammered a few times before giving up with a snort, tail absently curling against Frostgaze in the quiet space.

Frostgaze could only stare into the darkness of the Medicine Den, listening, feeling Webshadow press his face into his fur like one of his adopted kits. It was nice... peaceful. Maybe this was what love was. The mention of Swiftheart having foreseen this made the tom snort gently, a rumble in his chest. He supposed he was not great with emotions, certainly not understanding his own. All he knew was that this was good, what was here in the now was good. Someday Webshadow would die, and Frostgaze wouldn't know how to react. He supposed that he would understand what he had to do when that time came... but he was a healthy tom, and a good fighter. The deputy wasn't worried.

"I think I would like it to mean we are mates... if you accept of course. I am afraid I cannot describe what I feel for you, but I have never been good with emotions, for better or for worse. All I know is that spending my life with you, loving you, it feels right, and I cannot say I feel that way often. Only with you." Frostgaze leaned against Webshadow gently, doing his best not to aggravate any wounds.

"I am not surprised," he mused quietly, "that Swiftheart foresaw this. She always has been good with emotions... and tends to speak before she thinks. Honestly, it is humorous I did not see this before now. I wonder how many of our clanmates simply watched and assumed." His tail gently swept the floor, and he immediately picked it up. He didn't want it getting dirtier than it was.