Lost Feathers [closed]

After meeting Hawkuncle at the border, Dawnfeather had started frequenting them more often. While she was still working on connecting with all of her Clanmates, she was curious as to what cats from other Clans thought (and also how vicious they were- after that horrid ThunderClan apprentice attacked her, she wasn’t going anywhere near the Fallen Oak). It was early morning, and birds were singing in the trees. Dawnfeather never hunted them while they sang. She enjoyed the music. Springing down from her tree, she landed near the Highpine with a trill, looking up and “singing” along with the birds. A shiver ran down her spine, a shiver of contentment and happiness. She’d seen Hawkuncle. She’d talked with Beechaunt, Smokema, Prima, Dandelionpaw, Olivepaw, and Beetlepaw. She had friends. Life was good.

Maybe she’d talk with Beetlepaw later today, or maybe go on a walk with Beechaunt and Smokema. Maybe she’d spar with Dandelionpaw and Olivepaw. Maybe she’d make a new friend. The day was full of possibilities… but for now she’d sit here and make bird noises back at the birds. What? It was fun!

She wasn't sure why her paws had led her in the direction highpine, but Birdsong moved quietly through the trees, careful to avoid straying into Skyclan territory proper. The forest seemed quieter, almost peaceful. Birdsong (actual birdsong) was carried softly over the breeze and the gray tabby tipped her head, listening. A new voice joined the birds in their song, though Birdsong immediately recognized it as the voice of a cat. A cat, singing? She didn't know many Skyclanners who would do that. Transfixed, the former Skyclan leapt from branch to branch, moving toward the source of the noise.

A golden she-cat was in a tree, and she seemed to be alone. Birdsong watched for a moment, paws absently bringing her a bit closer. She recognized the she-cat as one of her cousins, though they'd seldom interacted before Birdsong had left. What she knew of Dawnfeather was that wasabout as unlike most of Skyclan as Birdsong herself was. Not violent, not battle-thirsty. Were it anyone else, Birdsong would've fled.

"Dawnfeather," Birdsong gave the golden she-cat a dip of her head. "Don't tell anyone I'm here, please... I'm just passing through." Her voice was soft as she spoke, and her tone conveyed a mix of anxiety and fear that she was unused to hearing. There was a hint of anger as well, though it wasn't even remotely directed towards the cousin she barely knew.

At the sound of her voice being called, Dawnfeather gave a little jump (although she didn’t fall out of the tree this time). “Hawkuncle,” she started, turning around, before her brain processed that this was not Hawkuncle’s voice. A grey tabby? Ah, yes, Birdsong- wait, what? Maybe she should’ve paid more attention to which cats walked out of camp and didn’t return. “Oh, hi!” She waved her tail enthusiastically. “I won’t tell anyone if you don’t want me to, of course… but… do you mind telling me why so many cats are leaving SkyClan?” She asked in confusion. “Of course it’s okay if you don’t want to,” she hurriedly added, “But there have been a lot of SkyClan cats leaving lately and maybe it’s something I can fix?” Hawkuncle, Birdsong, Shadewing, Tornshadow, Jasminepaw, good stars, that was a lot of cats. “I missed you!” She purred happily, smiling. Although she… hadn’t really known her… cousin (right?) she was sure she would have missed her if she had known her! And she did miss her, now that she had remembered her. It was just nice to make others feel wanted.

'Hawkuncle!'

Birdsong blinked in confusion at the... name? Clearly Dawnfeather hadn't been paying attention, and had been expecting to see someone else. Her whiskers twitched in mild amusement. There was something oddly innocent and endearing about her younger cousin, and Birdsong was glad to know that Skyclan had at least one other cat that wasn't the type to jump immediately into violence.

"I-" She began, then shook her head. If Beechface hadn't told anyone else the truth, Birdsong was... Okay with it, actually. She didn't want to be thought of as the daughter of the clan's medicine cat.

"Maybe they're all as sick of the constant violence and turmoil as I am? And nobody in the clan liked Tornshadow, she's better off without being here." It was unlike her to speak so bluntly and with such bitterness, and she hated doing so. It reminded her of Beechface and Ravenclaw. Yet there was little else she could have said to answer Dawnfeather's question, and Birdsong was simply glad that she'd rather talk than do the alternative at finding a former clanmate on her territory's border.

“I like Tornshadow!” Dawnfeather immediately volunteered, despite the fact she’d only seen her… twice? As a kit, no less. Still… “It’s terrible to not feel wanted. I’m sure Prima and Smokema and Beechaunt and Dandelionpaw and Olivepaw and Beetlepaw and Hawkuncle and me would like her back! And we haven’t had hardly any… turmoil. Well… after Beechaunt and the whole tree falling stuff…” The scent of burnt flesh wafted into her nostrils again. Ugh. “Last Gathering didn’t have any lightning or anything,” she finished somewhat lamely. Maybe Birdsong had a point. Weren’t Gatherings supposed to be peaceful?

“Leaving won’t stop turmoil,” she pointed out, making sure to keep her tone… not-condemning. “Maybe if you came back that might actually stop some turmoil? It’s your choice, of course,” she quickly added. ”I… guess I’m just curious? I don’t want everycat to leave.” Herself, alone in the middle of a desolate camp… she shivered, despite the rising sun.

Birdsong's tail twitched, claws gripping the branch she perched on as Dawnfeather spoke. If only she knew... Birdsong's mother hadn't even wanted her. Beechface used the excuse of being too busy, but Birdsong no longer believed who she had once thought of as one of the more honest (if unnecessarily hostile) cats in the clan. At least Dawnhawk (who she was assuming was this 'Hawkuncle' Dawnfeather mentioned, his was the only name that made sense) had wanted Tornshadow. Dawnfeather had mentioned several other clanmates, half of whom Birdsong was only vaguely familiar with. Prima... Primroselight? Smokema... Smokefeather, she thought.

Grandmother had hardly seemed to notice her grandchildren, either, or at least not Birdsong and her sister, for all of Wrenspring's efforts. The thought made her wince internally. Shouldn't have come here, should've just kept moving like she'd planned.

Dawnfeather's next words pulled Birdsong back to the present, and she blinked at the other cat. There... Hadn't been lightning at the last gathering... That implied that there had been lightning previously. Dawnfeather could've just been joking, Birdsong hoped she was joking. She was too scared to ask, however.

"Skyclan needs far more help than me coming back." Birdsong snorted, "Everyone's so bloodthirsty, and there's always something happening to their detriment." She mewed, "I don't think I can go back... Even if I wanted to, which I don't. Living on my own has been... peaceful. More peaceful than Skyclan has ever been." Nobody needed to know that she was running around with Tornshadow. Birdsong had been somewhat conflicted before leaving the territory with Tornshadow, but the time to think and clear her head had made her realize that Skyclan wasn't worth going back to. Not now, at least.

“Not everyone is bloodthirsty,” Dawnfeather mewed, sitting down and wrapping her tail around her paws. “Us younger cats- we’re nice! We’ve heard the tales of what happens when you’re not nice, anyways. And lots of cats are nice!” She considered rolling out the names again but… yeah, no. “Well, I’m glad you’re happy,” she purred, although her heart sank. What was she doing wrong? Why was everycat leaving SkyClan? I’ll never leave, she internally promised herself, eyes hardening. I’ll never leave my friends, family, and home.

“If I may ask,” she began, breaking the silence she’d let extend for a few moments. “Are you… all by yourself? With Leaf-bare coming?” Granted, she’d never experienced Leaf-bare, but from what she’d been told, it was terrible. “What if you sprain your paw or something? Do you know the basic herbs?” She asked worriedly, now more concerned for Birdsong than even Hawkuncle. At least he knew herbs- Birdsong was all by herself. “I can tell you some of them if you want!” the young warrior offered, her tail twitching nervously. All by herself… stars, that must be terrible…  when she’d been on her own she’d had Hawkuncle. Birdsong had no one.

Dawnfeather's concern was touching. It had been a while since Birdsong had felt that anyone in Skyclan had actually cared about her, and here was Dawnfeather, ready to help someone who had deserted the clan and who had practically been a stranger to her beforehand.

"Don't worry about me, Dawnfeather. I'll be fine." She offered the golden she-cat a soft smile, though it faded somewhat at the mention of herbs. Beechface was a medicine cat, and she'd trampled the code and shown it never mattered. She was selfish and had no sympathy or compassion for anyone but herself. She was overbearing and did know herbs and their uses, and had at least been happy to point out the very basics when Birdsong had been stuck in the medicine den. "Beechface taught me a little, but thank you." She mewed.