It was an ordinary night, or at least as ordinary as a night in ShadowClan could ever be. As Mothglow led a small group of apprentices into the marsh, intending to teach them some of the more common herbs - the less time ShadowClan’s medicine cat spent restocking herb stores, the more she had to dedicate to healing; and so she thought it was a worthwhile endeavor - no one thought twice about it.
It wasn’t unusual behavior, after all; it was something she’d started doing moons ago, and kept up with the younger apprentices whenever she could spare the time. And it went well, at first: Mothglow was her usual chipper self, easily led on tangents by the playful and curious apprentices; and the apprentices in turn were at least pretending to pay attention as she explained the differences between leaves that all looked quite the same to them.
Dewpaw gathered cobwebs while telling the worst jokes he could think of, Littlepaw pointedly pretended he couldn’t hear a word his friend said as he stuck leaves to the silk, and Nightpaw stifled her laughter as she bundled leaves and flowers, hoping that they wouldn’t notice.
(They did, but that’s another story; one for another time and another place.)
(
This story belongs to Mothglow.)
Mothglow felt something she couldn’t quite explain as she watched the trio of apprentices laughing and bickering in turn; something that made her heart swell and sink in the same breath. Perhaps it was that she’d never had such closeness. She had her family, her clan and her kin, and she loved them so dearly and so fiercely…
But Nightpaw’s eyes twinkled and she snorted a laugh as Littlepaw finally added his own terrible pun to their conversation, and Dewpaw smirked victoriously as he’d gotten them both to lighten up some; and she thought maybe it would have been nice to have such close friends.
She’d had her sister, once, but that felt like a lifetime ago now.
Still, there was no point in dwelling on what might have been; on all the things she might have been, might have done, in another life. This was the one she had chosen, after all, time and again, and she loved it as much as she loved anything.
“Do you want to see something?” she asked them, finding they’d gathered more than enough herbs for her satisfaction. They deserved some sort of a reward for such hard work, as far as she was concerned, though they’d taken their time with all the playfights and bickering. They were barely more than kits, after all, each of them recently apprenticed - not that she’d have minded either way; the presence of playful apprentices was always a welcome distraction from the monotony of sorting through herbs.
“Yes!” they chorused, because Mothglow might have been older, and not quite a warrior, but she was a medicine cat and often tagged along with warrior patrols - if she thought something was cool enough to share with some apprentices, it was bound to be
super cool.
Smiling to herself, she led the way without another word; gesturing for them to follow her lead. It wasn’t too far from where they were, so the walk was pleasantly short.
The moon hung low in the sky as they approached her favorite place, an open space of the marsh where the starlit sky stretched out above them as far as any of them could see. Marshflowers were plentiful here, as were the fireflies; they blinked in and out of sight, lighting the earth as the stars lit the sky.
“This is my favorite place,” she told them, her voice soft where it was usually loud and bright.
“Sometimes I think that maybe the fireflies are stars that stay close to us, that don't want to go so far as the ones in the sky do... And there's so many of them here! The flowers are a wonderful source of herbs, and they're pretty too. Mostly, though, I like to come out here to think - or sometimes to speak to our ancestors.”“I thought we went to the Moonstone to do that,” Nightpaw interjected.
“We go to the Moonstone when we want them to answer us,” she explained.
Dewpaw, who seemed even more confused with that answer, chose that moment to cut in: “Wait, what about--”
As she glanced his way to offer an answer, she spotted something behind him that was swift approaching.
Badger.
“All of you,” she whispered urgently.
“Behind me, now.”Confused, the apprentices nonetheless heeded her order, and satisfied that they were safe she assumed a battle stance. In that moment she was glad she’d always tried to keep up with her warrior skills, as well as thankful for her large frame.
“Mothglow, please, you might get hurt!”
She turned back to give the apprentice what she hoped was a reassuring smile.
“No one is going to get hurt, Nightpaw.”Then, before the badger could have a chance to attack, she chose to strike. Her paws were swift and her claws were sharp, tearing through the badger’s fur and flesh indiscriminately; the only sound to escape her as she dove back to evade its own attack a furious hiss.
The fight was swift, brutal, and
entirely one-sided; lasting only minutes, if that. The badger fell limp at her paws (dead or just unconscious, she wasn’t sure, either way it was no longer a threat to them), but Mothglow - who had, true to her word, managed to escape the battle relatively unscathed - didn’t turn to greet the apprentices waiting for her to lead them back to camp.
Instead, she laid silently in the marsh, looking up at the stars, and she stayed perfectly still.
(Of course, that was only what her young charges saw. The truth is never quite so simple: there are sad farewells and sweet reunions yet to be had.)
(Once again,
this story belongs to Mothglow.)
The truth was as follows:
As a medicine cat, for much of her life Mothglow had walked the fine line between waking and dreaming, happily playing messenger to each side; and rather than any sort of sadness, as her thoughts began to fade she found that she was overall content with what she had accomplished in her life. There was no uncertainty, no worry - aside from a vague concern for the apprentices, who would surely find their way safely back to camp, anyhow - only a calm sort of anticipation as she wondered who was waiting to greet her on the other side.
I hope, was her last conscious thought,
that I get to be a firefly.The world, it seemed, had other plans.
“I’d hoped the next time I saw your unnecessarily fuzzy pelt, it wouldn’t be riddled with stars.” A rough voice mused from behind her, a sad sort of humor laced through the words.
Mentor. Mother. Leader. Thornstar had been many things to the medicine cat before her. She’d only recently found her way into the glimmering fields of Starclan, and she’d hoped to meet her daughter in her dreams. Turns out, Mothglow had other plans.
“And what in Magpiestar’s name are you doing here so soon, Furball? I see my time with you in your apprenticeship wasn't entirely lost on you considering the state of that oversized rat, but I’m pretty sure you still had a few extra moons left in you.”Mothglow’s smile was radiant, if the tiniest bit sheepish.
”So did I… But if this is the way things are, then that’s okay.” True to her word, she seemed perfectly content to stay where she was; beaming at the cat that held the title of her mother.
“I had lots of time with everyone, after all, and... I missed you! Well, we all did, but...”Thornstar stepped forward and rested her muzzle on the dark-furred she-cat’s forehead, her mismatched green gaze uncharacteristically soft.
“Still, it’s good to see you, kit. You did well.”Sootstrike stood not far from his heavily scarred sister, the resemblance between the two of them uncanny. Sporting his typical grin, the tom nodded to the she-cat before him. Last time he’d seen her, she’d still been so young. This time, she stood only a touch shorter than him. His remaining green eye flickered with mixed emotion. While he wasn’t exactly happy to see the medicine cat here just yet, the sight of his sister’s rare gentle side couldn’t help but amuse him.
“Aww, what a touchin’ reunion, but where’s my hug huh? What am I, crow-food? I’m feelin’ left out over here. You’re gonna break m’ heart over here, munchkin.””Sootstrike! You’re here, too?” It seemed like she was always surprised to see him - she supposed that was something she’d have to get used to, now.
”It’s good to see you, too!”The tom ducked his head a little, his expression almost becoming sheepish.
“Awe, quit bein’ so happy. That stuff’s contagious.”“Is there room for us in the family reunion?” asked a familiar voice. Mothglow turned to see two of the cats who had guided her through her medicine cat apprenticeship - Lilacfall and Featherlight; the two who had greeted her when she chose the path of a medicine cat and again when she finally received her true name.
“Always,” she assured them.
“We’re so proud of you,” Lilacfall told her, touching her nose to the medicine cat’s shoulder.
“Though it still feels too soon… You did what you thought was right, didn’t you?” At this, Mothglow nodded, and Lilacfall nodded approvingly.
“Then that’s all that matters.”Featherlight was next, touching noses with Mothglow, as a mentor to their apprentice.
”We don’t choose how much time we have, or when it comes to an end… We only choose what we do with it. And in that, I believe, you have done well.” She stepped back with a small, soft smile.
“May ShadowClan have many moons of prosperity, even without your guidance.”As Featherlight stepped away, a blueish white pelt became visible on the other side of the crowd. Silent Snows had watched the reunion quietly. Seeing these cats interact with the sister she’d forsaken so long ago... a dull throb flared up in her heart. She deserved that feeling, she was sure. At the same time, she couldn’t help but feel happy for her sister.
Look at her, she’d found a whole new family while they had been apart.
Realizing her sister’s deep orange gaze had fallen to her, Silent Snows simply nodded awkwardly and muttered a simple,
“H-hey...”Mothglow’s eyes lit up as she spotted her sister, and any lingering feelings, doubts and conflicted thoughts, all of that melted away in an instant as she launched herself forward to tackle her sister in an affectionate display.
“Silent Snows! I missed you!”It wasn't everyone she'd ever loved all in one place, but it was close, and it was more than enough for her. She'd seek out the others later, and reunite with the rest of her family; for now, at least, she was happy to stay like this.
(I'd like to thank Kari for her assistance with this!)
