This Time It Wasn't a Fox

Jaystream entered the medicine cat den again after leaving the prey they caught. At least, this time the wounds weren't as bad as the last time but he was sure that if Goldenpaw healed him he would probably get scolded by her again. He sighed, preparing himself for that, and then the warrior called for help. "Hi! It's me again, Jaystream! I need a little help, please." If there was anyone in the den, then that cat would listen to him.

The deputy laid down on one of the empty nests and waited for Cloudstone or Goldenpaw to come and help. He really hated being a burden for the two medicine cats but it was better than taking wounded apprentices to them instead of him. The tom was older and stronger than them so he could stand a few battle scratches like that if that meant he could protect the younger ones, who weren't as strong as him.

"By the gods! Jaystream I will seriously send you to Starclan myself if you keep getting injured like this! Honestly, you need to stop. It's leaf-bare. I can't keep treating you or any other cat. Your self-sacrificial ways are going to get you killed, as well as your clan-mates." Goldenpaw snapped, padding towards the deputy from her herb shelf, turning on her paws she shook them around a bit in the puddle by the side of her den and licking her paws clean of water.

Settling next to the tom she searched his fur for scratches and licked away all the crusty, dried blood so she could get a better look at the wounds. "You better be damn grateful that these aren't bad." She snapped, getting to her paws and dipping into her herb storage to grasp a few cobwebs, limping back she rested them across his wounds. She was taking a risk by not giving him marigold, but proper grooming of the wounds should hopefully prevent it.

Goldenpaw's ears flickered, back, forth, to the side, wherever her ears could swivel they swiveled. Listening to something as the den shuffled and the decorative stones and shells clacked. "You're free to go, Jaystream. But I refuse to heal you for the rest of Leaf-bare." Goldenpaw huffed, though albeit jokingly.

The tom almost jumped by the voice of the she-cat who seemed quite upset. Even if he already knew what was going to happen when he entered the medicine cat den, he couldn't help flattening his ears against his skull a bit intimidated by the golden she-cat. "Is good to see you too, Goldenpaw." He finally mewed, managing to smile kindly at the angered she-cat.

"Come on. You know that is what I am. If a clanmate that isn't as strong as me is in danger in front of my eyes, then I'll put myself at risk because I have more chances to survive. What do you prefer? A bunch of wounded apprentices coming to your den or just me? I know is not healthy but at least... others get the opportunity to live. For me, that's better. I mean, Ivystar would find soon another deputy if I die, don't you think? There a lot of capable warriors in the clan." The warrior mewed with slightly sad tone while the medicine cat checked his wounds and heal them quickly with some herbs. His thoughts wandered to his mother once again as he looked at his paws waiting for Goldenpaw to finish. Why was he the deputy? Goldenpaw was right... what he was constantly doing wasn't okay and it would lead him to death one day if he was too careless. A dead warrior wasn't suited for a rank like that but... there he was. Working every day as Ivystar's deputy even he didn't understand the reasons for her decision.

His mind focused again on the apprentice when she said she was done. The tom stood up, glad for the quick healing. "Thank you for everything again, Goldenpaw. I'll try to be more careful and stop getting wounded but I cannot promise you anything. You know me. It seems like my second home is the medicine den so I hope you're not talking seriously about not healing me again." He chuckled, letting his nerves and worries fade by the strong attitude of the young she-cat. She sure had a fire in her heart. Jaystream saw her as a close clanmate after every time he had been there but he asked himself what she would think of him. Probably she thought that the tom was really a burden and really annoying but there was no way to prove that.

OOC: I love Goldenpaw XD She's an awesome meddie

"There are no other warriors in this clan that can keep Riverclan from going down the blood-drenched path that Ivystar will take us." Goldenpaw's face darkened as her jaw hardened. "You must not die, Jaystream. For the good of Riverclan and all cats." Goldenpaw mewed. "The other warriors that she could choose will be easily swayed by Ivystar's thirst for blood, so well that we perhaps may be swimming in the blood of our enemies and our clan-mates for generations to come. Your life is a chance for peace." The she-cat shrugged like the words she was delivering did not bear any weight.

Brushing by the deputy she let the sun lick her paws. "You're always welcome in my den, you're always free to have a chat with me or Cloudstone. Though I prefer it if you didn't come injured, or I'll have you confined as well." Kicking away the snow from a moderately flat stone she brushed the cold away and made her way to the prey-pile before bringing it over to the warming stone and settling down, soaking up the warmth.

"You may wish to prevent injury, but you can't. Apprentices need to get hurt, to learn that what damage they cause will cause pain. If you've had your tail crushed by a boulder, you'd know how much it hurt and you would not return to sentiment to any cat, but if you did not, you would do it. They may not like the pain they cause, or know how it feels, and decide that the warrior life is not for them." Goldenpaw crunched into her fish, flinching at the squelch, she may be a Riverclan cat, but that didn't mean she had to like fish.

The tom lowered his head, thoughtful. Jaystream already knew that his mother wasn't a peaceful and calm cat at all but he never thought about her being a leader with a thirst for blood that could bring destruction to his clan. For him, even if he wasn't close to her as his son or as his deputy, Ivystar was only a leader that was willing to do anything for the well-being of the clan, no matter if Riverclan respected her more or less because of her actions. However, Goldenpaw was right. He wasn't like the leader at all and that what he scared him the most. Ivystar was powerful, strong and born to be a leader but him... he was too submissive, shy and socially anxious. How can he be the future leader being like that? The medicine cat apprentice said that he was a chance for peace... maybe... but he could also mean the future weakness of his clan if he didn't change.

Jaystream kept quiet until the young she-cat talked again when he was about to leave the den. She managed to make him smile. "If you allow me and I'm not a burden to you, then I'll be more than happy to visit you and just talk." He purred following her to the fresh-kill pile and then laying down next to her when she finally settled down for a meal. For him, it was still pretty earlier to eat and he had to wait for all of his clanmates to eat before him.

The deputy nodded as he smiled, resigned to Goldenpaw's reasoning. "Seeing it that way, I think you're right. Maybe I've been way too protective and I haven't given them what they need: a taste of the real life. You're quite a wise cat, Goldenpaw." He complimented her, looking at her with a shy but friendly smile.

"My wisdom comes from Starclan, you have them to thank. They are why I am here as your medicine cat, I'm only walking a pre-chosen path for me. It's my job to make sure Riverclan is strong and well, it's why I am here." Goldenpaw remarked, pushing her fish towards her eating companion. "And Riverclan sure isn't fitting the well part. Especially you, more fish in your diet, more protein." Goldenpaw meowed lazily, stretching out as she ran a paw over an ear.

"I know my purpose in life, maybe it's about time you found yours." Goldenpaw meowed softly, grooming her claws and picking the shed off.

The tall tom listened to his companion's response, who didn't hive too much importance to his compliment. But for the tom, he still believed that she was wise enough without Starclan and, of course, a loyal she-cat that was searching the same thing that he was looking for: the well-being of his clan. They might have different paths: she was meant to be a medicine cat, always staying in the camp healing her clanmate, while he was meant to be a fighter and leader ready to handle a whole clan of cats that trusted on his lead. However, that didn't mean they could share a similar objective and a friendship. That's why he accepted the meal without complaining too much about how others should eat before him. "Thank you." He mewed quietly before dipping his head to take a bite of the cold prey. Unlike Goldenpaw, fish was his favourite fresh-kill.

He gulped the meat quickly before the she-cat talked again. His eyes darkened as he looked at his own paws. My purpose of life... He thought troubled. What was his purpose? When he was a kit, he only wanted to be with his family in Riverclan but that didn't work out. When he was an apprentice, he worked so hard to become a warrior but... why? He wanted to make Ivystar proud of him... to make her notice him. and value him as a good member of her clan. But still, that wasn't his life purpose. And now that he was deputy... was that his purpose? The tom highly doubted that. "I wish... it was so easy to find it. You're lucky. You already know what you're meant to be, but me? Well, I'm like a lost kit. I don't have a proper purpose. I mean,... I'm deputy and I have to do all the duties of that rank but I never asked to be one. I was chosen by my mother and I accepted because I haven't other options. I didn't want to disappoint my clan, my family, my home. I always thought that my only goal in my life should be fighting and protecting Riverclan with everything that was in my power but... how can I be sure that that's my purpose in life? All I ever wanted was to have someone by my side so I can be there to protect him or her." He confessed, curling his fluffy tail around his body like he was hiding from the cold.

"I may be lucky to know my purpose, but I did not have a choice, to begin with. The whole of Riverclan is worthy of your protection, the whole of Riverclan will fight by your side, it may not be a singular cat that you think your purpose will lie with. If you want to find your purpose, you have to look for it, in every nook and cranny. Your purpose may to live as a loner for all I know. I'll tell you what. On my next meeting with the stars, I'll ask them to help me help you, or to just help you without me. It's not every day you get to befriend a medicine cat apprentice to find your purpose in life." Goldenpaw snorted, a small sneer on her face giving the deputy a small pap on his shoulder in good nature. The lovely golden she-cat looked at the bustling cats of Riverclan, eating, sharing tongues, organizing patrols for their little friend groups. Life was great, especially when she had the time to laze about and get fat, even in Leaf-bare. Because since she was a medicine cat or almost one, she had the time to do it, she didn't train as rigorously as her clan-mates and she wasn't the last to eat due to her position.

The tom sighed and finally managed to leave that darkened expression and smile at the young she-cat. "I guess you're right. It might not be easy but I won't give up yet and I would be very thankful if you're willing to help too even when I don't deserve your kindness." He purred, calmer and in peace. Watching the fish in front of his paws and then to the rest of the clan, he thought about how lucky he was for having clanmates like Goldenpaw and the rest of the warriors in Riverclan. Together, they worked for the safety of the rest of them and that's what made them stronger. The deputy couldn't ask for anything else than this.

However, his peaceful thought disappeared when he suddenly noticed what the she-cat meant with her last words and his green eyes glanced at her again, surprised. "W-Wait... you said... that we are friends now? For real?" Jaystream couldn't believe it. He really thought that she hated him for being so annoying every time he went to the medicine cat den with new wounds to treat. "I was sure you hate me." He commented, chuckling shily.

Goldenpaw couldn't help but bark out a laugh, her eyes tearing up as she wiped them with her paw. Bumping her shoulder with his in a sway before straightening back up, "Jaystream, you're the friendliest face I've seen in a while. Probably out of the entire clan if I'm being fair. Sure you coming in injured is a bother at times but I could never turn away Riverclans deputy." the she-cat purred, puffing her fur out against the cold. "Of course you're a friend, sure we haven't been very close in general but I respect you." Goldenpaw meowed with a self-assured nod.

Jaystream blushed at her compliment as he turned his head away, shyly. The friendliest face, uh? I never thought about it... He thought happily, smirking to himself before returning his gaze to the fluffy she-cat. He nodded as well, firmly and with a wide smile. "I respect you a lot too as a medicine cat and a friend, Goldenpaw. If we're not close now, then we have to know each other better, right?" He purred delightedly. A friend... when was the last time he had one? The lean tom didn't want to mess up this chance so he promised to himself that he had to be a good friend for the medicine cat.

He bit the fish that he had forgotten and after he ate it, he returned his attention to Goldenpaw. "If you don't mind, we can share prey more often and I can visit you whenever I'm free from organizing patrols and doing apprentices ceremonies. Of course, I won't bother you when you have your own duties to do." He mewed with a happy flick of his tail. For the first time in this leafbare, he didn't feel cold when he was over the snow because of the warmness of this moment.

"Yeah, sounds great! I'll always need a helping paw when Cloudstone is out." Goldenpaw purred, her tail swishing softly as she stood, stretching out stiff muscles. "Well, I've got to go back in and tidy everything up, the more dirt I can get out of there, the better for everyone." She meowed delicately, dipping her head to the deputy. "May Starclan guide your path." Goldenpaw chirped before padding into her den, her tail swishing the snow and large bits of debris out of the entrance way before completely disappearing.