I still love you, ya know

Walking up to Ashstars den, Gustpuddle went over the plans she had, that she had been planning to execute for a while. But now, especially with all of the tension in the clan, seemed like a good of a time as ever. When her paws reached the entrance to her den, she took a breath and began.This shouldn't be too hard. It's only Ashstar after all. My grandmother. "Ashstar, can I speak with you.?" She released her breath, hoping the two could possibly go on a little patrol, talk things out.

The WindClan leader rested in her nest, gray fur ragged and unkempt, tail drooping. She needed sleep, but she was mostly hiding from Smokepelt and Cedarfur. The last thing she needed was their accusing glares that she didn't deserve by any means. Ashstar's ears perked up at the sound of another family member's voice, but her heart sank lower in her chest as she remembered that most of her family hated her. At least her grandkit's voice wasn't filled with hatred and accusation. "Yes, Gustpuddle?" she sighed out, voice hoarse and tired.

Here we go, don't kill me..."I was just, um, wondering if maybe you wanted to go on a little patrol, maybe visit the Lone Stump for a while? I figured times have been really tough lately,especially with so much... S A L T! tension in the clan. Just a little time to relax. We haven't really talked all that much, ya know?" She looked up to the sky, hoping she wouldn't be a disturbance to Ashstar.

Ashstar blinked at the suggestion. She had been expecting accusations, or passive-agressive questions, or anger from her grandkit. That was all she had been getting from her family, barring Brindlewhisker, lately. A patrol sounds.... Nice. The leader nodded in slight surprise and got to her feet. "Um, thank you, Gustpuddle. That's very thoughtful of you. A patrol it is, then."

Letting out a sigh of relief, Gustpuddle waited for Ashstar's command to move along."Where to first? Saltcity?" She smiled, glad that she could bring some joy to her life. She had been getting so many accusations, rude comments, and lectures from everyone, even her own family. But she wouldn't be that one. Not today, not ever. She smiled, nodding to the fresh-kill pile."Or would you rather eat first?" She purred, she was so glad that Ashstar wouldn't reflect all the bad comments back to her. She wasn't expecting it, but she wouldn't be surprised if she did. Being leader must be a hard job, and she tried her best to understand that.

Ashstar shook her head with a smile. "We can eat whatever we catch later. Plus, I'm not hungry." The leader actually hadn't eaten in a couple of days, but she wanted to leave the food for those who needed it. Gustpuddle's mention of the Lone Stump made her shudder. That was her son's go-to place, and Smokepelt was the last person she wanted to run into right now. "How about I show you one of my favorite places in the territory?" she asked instead, a slight sparkle in her spring green eyes. For some reason, being around her grandkit, a family member who wasn't accusing or condemning her, made her feel a little like her old self. Without waiting for the gray-and-white she-cat's response, the WindClan she-cat started going towards the entrance, motioning for her to follow.

Gustpuddle smiled, following close behind Ashstar. She'd have a nice time today, the two of them could relax together, share stories and memories. And then have a delicious meal afterward. Today would be amazing, and she wasn't gonna let anyone change it. And she had some important news to tell Ashstar as well. She would tell her when they arrived wherever they were going."So, Ashstar, where are we off to? I've got something, well, at least to me, exciting to tell you." She smiled, Ashstar would be the first to know. Not even her own mate knew yet, but she had a sneaking suspicion that he was on to her. If Beetlewing were right, at least. When she shook herself back into reality, she saw the beautiful sparkle in Ashstar's eyes that had never been there before. At least not that she'd seen. Maybe this could help for it to be there a little more often, to help pull Ashstar out of the sadness that had become her disloyal family. She had been betrayed from so many cats, but not her. She would be sure of that. She loved Ashstar, and she was her role model. She had always dreamed of being like her, as a little kit in the nursery. All her dreams were filled with the wonders and joys of having a close family. But she had a different life, and she accepted it. She was alive and well, and not everyone hated Ashstar and herself. Not everyone.

OOC: THAT WAS SO FEELSY WHAT THE FRICKIN HECK

OOC: ;)

IC: Ashstar smiled at her grandkit's hinting. She wouldn't mind some good news to take her mind off of the problems she had been experiencing lately. As they continued through the territory, a soft breeze stirring her long gray fur, she allowed herself to feel at peace. It was just her and one of her family members in the moors. No Smokepelt, no Cedarfur, no RiverClan, no problems. The leader inhaled the sweet scent of WindClan, paws making impressions in the soft soil as the long grass whipped around her legs. Despite her ShadowClan heritage, she was WindClan, through and through. She turned to Gustpuddle, who was right by her side. "The place I want to show you is just over the next hill," she informed her, green eyes twinkling. "Race you there!" And without further warning the gray-furred she-cat was off like a flash, running through the tall grass with long strides, fluffy tail streaming behind her. She laughed as she ran, the exercise exhilarating. Despite not having eaten or slept well in days, she maintained a good speed as she sprinted across the territory, paw following paw.

"Oh it's on!" She yowled, immediately racing forward on her paws. Sharing Ashstar's blood did mean she had bits of Shadowclan in her, but she was Windclan as well and was therefore among the fastest cats in the forest. She almost flew on her paws, racing past Ashstar as the bright New- leaf grass whipped at her legs. She looked back at Ashstar once she had passed the next hill over, and she was only a rabbits length or so behind her. She sat in the long grass, pleased with her performance. "It's beautiful, Ashstar," She commented as her grandmother finally appeared behind her.

Ashstar let out a laugh as Gustpuddle passed her. Of course, her grandkit was much younger than her, with a good rest and plenty of food, so it wasn't surprising. But back when she was Ashwing, a young warrior of WindClan, caught up in daily warrior life, respect for Falconstar and a pride in her Clan, no one could beat her in a race. A tinge of sadness threatened to return as she remembered long, sunny greenleaf days spent racing Icestorm through the endless territory, but she pushed it away. No reason to feel grief over love long gone. She knew Icestorm was watching over her from StarClan, and it almost felt like he was there with her. Taking a deep breath of the fresh air and almost tasting his familiar scent, she closed her eyes for a second. When the moment passed, she caught up with Gustpuddle, sitting on the grassy knoll that was her favorite place, and looked out over the greatest view in the territories.

From this spot, she could see all of WindClan territory, spread out before her like a blank, grassy canvas, the only spots of color below different shades of brown dirt and light green moorland grasses. She could catch glimpses of the marshy pine forest of her kithood and a crystal-clear river with sparse trees. But the most stunning view of all was that of WindClan camp. From here, one could see the entirety of camp- the full-to-bursting warriors' den, the replenished fresh-kill pile, the humble leader's den. One could view in great detail everyday Clan life continuing forward- Brindlewhisker organizing patrols, cats returning from the moors with fat rabbits, Beetlewing and Sagepaw tending a torn claw. One observed queens watching their kits romp in the sun, apprentices bringing the fattest rabbits to the elders' den in exchange for stories, warriors putting moss in nests, mentors and their apprentices training, mates and friends sharing tongues. The beauty of WindClan life was a peaceful melody, a sense of security that calmed Ashstar's worries and fears. It was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen. "Here it is. My favorite spot in WindClan territory."

"You can see everything from here!" Her heart hadn't raced like this in a long while, and her eyes grew to have the same sparkle as Ashstar's. "There are great things in life among the bad. Sometimes, you just have to tune out the bad and focus on the good." She said to Ashstar, whom she was sitting right next to. Their pelts shared the exact same gray color that some others in the family had, but their pelts gleamed next to each other. If a stranger were to look at the two, they might even think they were sisters! The only difference between them besides her white coloring, of course, was their eyes. Ashstar had the most wonderful Spring- green eyes, and she shared the amber- brown color of her fathers. "Have you heard anything about Kindleblaze? I haven't seen her in the territories, or the borders." She commented, her older sisters exile the only thing that she could think of other than how beautiful the territory was.

Ashstar's temporarily happy bubble burst as her grandkit mentioned Kindleblaze. Kindleblaze... She seemed to almost visibly deflate as the memories of that fateful day rushed back. The leader didn't regret exiling the she-cat- she never had and never would, not for a second. It was the only way to avoid another fight, and she had deserved it. But it still pained her to think of the warrior. Maybe if she'd given the she-cat a different mentor, or taught her the warrior code better, or a million other things, the exiling wouldn't have been necessary. But it had been, and was. And so WindClan was safe for a few more moons. The WindClan she-cat took a deep breath, letting the wind ruffle her long gray fur. "...No," she got out finally. "No, Gustpuddle, I haven't heard a thing. I assume she's living in Twolegplace now. And, eben if you did see her on the territories, you would treat her as a trespasser, and not as a sister. I... know this must have been hard for you, but... it was the only option. You- you must understand this."

I know, she did wrong. She got what she deserved." She commented thoughtfully. "On a happier note, the news I told you about. Can you guess?" She began to quiver with delight, she was so excited! She beamed at Ashstar, her tail swishing back and forth with the anxiety of her finding out. The first to find out, at that!

Ashstar blinked as Gustpuddle changes the subject. Remembering her grandkit's original claim of having good news, she turned to the gray-and-white warrior with a smile, glad to be off the topic of Kindleblaze. "Wait, wait, let me guess," the leader meowed hurriedly, almost laughing. She scrutinized the she-cat with mock contemplation. She thought she knew what the young warrior was talking about, but she decided to let her say it. "Your sister's apprentice is ready to be a warrior?" she guessed jokingly, green eyes sparkling.

"Nope, nice guess!" She joked, nudging Ashstar playfully."Beetlepa- wing, Beetlewing, told me that I'm with kits again!" She hopped up, showing Ashstar how her belly was already starting to protrude. Her grin stretched from one side of her face to the other, auburn orbs glowing in the morning light. She was practically shivering with delight! "Not even Hollowfang knows yet. You're the first, Ashstar!" She sat back down in front of Ashstar, face to face.