I hurt ( Closed for Clover(Cloud))

Rockpaw was hurting, not entirely physically, but mentally. Rockpaw spent his nights awake and staring at the nursery den, his throat constricting in his grief and regret. The tom spent his days on patrols and hunting, never taking a break as he did his best to pull his weight after all, he didn't want his clanmates to hate him more than they already did.

Rockpaw laid in his nest now, his fur clearly un-groomed it hung off his body like moss draped over a trees branch. The Thunderclan tom didn't want to be there, existing, if he could trade his life for that kits mother he would. Ducking his head under his paws he gave a small little gasp, his body shaking with sobs, regret and hatred and regret and hatred making his throat clench and his body shudder.

He tried to stop when he heard a cat rustle in their bed, their breathing changing. Curling up to face away, he didn't want them to see, they'd probably yell at him more.

Cloudpaw woke when she heard sobs. Sitting up she blinked the sleep from her eyes and looked around the den for whoever was sobbing. Her eyes landed on Rockpaw, seeing his breathing ragged as if he'd been crying. Stretching the she cat got up and gently pressed her nose into his fur. "Rockpaw.." She meowed softly hoping he'd look at her.

Rockpaw couldn't help but feel just the tiniest bit relieved when he heard Cloudpaws voice, she seemed to be the only one not harming him in any way through the whole fiasco. Picking up his head he drew his paws across his eyes before looking at her, paws shifting he turned to look back at the nursery. Rockpaw suddenly realized that he must have woken her up with his crying, looking at his paws he muttered. "I'm sorry, I'll stop. You can go back to your nest now." He meowed.

Cloudpaw shook her head. "So It's ok I get up around this time anyways. What's wrong?" She meowed.

The tom frowned at her question, shaking his head as he got to his paws. "Should be obvious." He meowed maybe a little bit too harshly. Despite this the apprentice stepped out of the den, signalling with his tail that he'd like her to follow him. He wouldn't dare speak of his problems with the other cats around, it seemed they would rip his throat out like he - no don't think of that.

Cloudpaw shrugged but followed.

"I'm sorry, again, for uh, bothering you... I guess I'm still upset about what I did... stupid really." He muttered, looking anywhere else but Cloudpaw as he walked.

Cloudpaw purred. "It's fine its nice having somebody but your overprotective brother to talk to. And it's not stupid to be upset. At least you feel something right? i bet if Sandpaw did that he wouldn't even care, so its better to feel something than nothing at all." She meowed.

"Yeah... it's nice having you at my side Cloudpaw, it seems as if everyones constantly waiting for me to screw up again! I'm trying to make things right Cloudpaw! I'm trying and no one is seeing that! I-I'm so scared Cloudpaw." He spluttered, rounding on her abruptly, tilting forwards till he rested his head into her neck fur. His breath hitched.

Cloudpaw blinked as he buried himself into her fur. Her eyes softened even more and head rested her head on his. "I know Rockpaw. It''ll be fine just you wait. I don't know how but someday everything is going to be alright, then maybe everybody will need you instead of thinking that you'll screw up. Everybody makes mistakes but when cats make mistakes others don't know how to react and always almost end up overreacting and making things worse, some cats take that as everybody hates them when they are only trying to help, well which really doesn't do much to help. Clan mates need to stick together and defend each other not go after one another. It's the only way we'll survive, is by working together." She meowed softly.

''But I made the worst mistake, I orphaned a kitten! That's the worst! No one is sticking to my side, not even my own mentor!'' Rockpaw spluttered, dampening her neck fur, he didn't care but Cloudpaw probably minded. Breathing in her scent and finding some comfort he entertained the thought of her being his friend, she did stick with him... ''You're sticking with me... gosh the clan must hate you too I'm so sorry..'' he said once more.

Cloudpaw chuckled. "I don't care what they think Rockpaw. And at least you didn't leave the kit there. You brought him to a new family, one that will take care of him as if he was their own.en lots of cases of this. I was orphaned after to. Both my parents were killed in battle and now the only family I have left is Sandpaw and Stonepaw.. and you.." She replied. He was dampening her fur but she didn't care.

"I'm sorry to hear that Cloudpaw.. " Rockpaw muttered, pulling his head back from Cloudpaw, feeling a bit of regret as he realized that Cloudpaw might just have feelings for him. Was she only with him for that? He didn't really like her back in that way, after all he was gay. "Thanks for this Cloudpaw, I'm feeling a bit better." He mewed, only partially true.

Cloudpaw shrugged.