Seeking Answers, Maybe Cures [c]

Duckpaw stood at the entrance of Littlesplash's den, silently urging themselves to find the courage to just step in. For a while now, they knew that things weren't alright - that their daytime sleepiness wasn't...Normal. Moons of praying that it would just go away, that they would manage a span of a few sunrises without needing to take multiple naps a day... That they would just be better without having to admit to anybody that something was wrong with them. They didn't want to be different - or at least any more different than not being a tom or she-cat. To be able to make friends but it proved hard when they didn't... They didn't want the Clan to know that they weren't okay - that they might never be useful or that if the other Clans found out, a point to scorn RiverClan for having such a...Weak link.

And so Duckpaw stood there, fighting the fear of Littlesplash confirming that Duckpaw wasn't normal, wasn't healthy and would forever be a point of shame when it came to the great cats of RiverClan... Over the fear of simply not knowing why or if there was even a cure for what was happening to them. Finally, the glimmer of hope that this was at least curable won out and they pushed themselves into the den, glancing around for any sign of the medicine cat. "Littlesplash? D-Do you have a moment to talk? I...I really need to talk to you about something. To get your advice," they meowed, ears slicking back. Already their courage was starting to wane, considering quickly changing their mind that it was 'nothing important' and turning tail to flee but they remained.

Things would get better...Right?

Littlesplash mumbled to himself softly, reciting herbs and shifting things around the den. With the threat of violence over the horizon, he needed to be prepared. Even after visiting the Moonstone and receiving his full medicine cat name, the young tom was still feeling the whirlwind of the past few moons, a sensation that constantly left him feeling underprepared and inadequate without the peripheral guidance of Sandyshell. It was Duckpaw's voice that finally pulled him from the focused stupor.

He blinked as he turned to them and offered a warm smile. Given his positon as medicine cat, the two of them had never shared a den. However, the apprentice's meek intrustion put him more at ease. Littlesplash felt like he was in good company rather than at the pressure of interacting with another cat. Not that he didn't like any of his clanmates but rather his own anxious heart often stilled his tongue. His tail flicked as he turned to address them, "Of course, Duckpaw. I'm here for anything you need. How can I help?" The idea of any cat coming to him for advice made him feel useful over important and immediately any worries about the future slid to the back of his mind, so he could give all his attention to whatever Duckpaw might need.

Duckpaw gave Littlesplash a weak smile as they slipped further into the den, taking a seat off to the side. There, however, they froze - unsure on how to even start. What could they say to even make thing situation sound...Serious? They were tired half of the time - most cats would likely push them to get better sleep but they tried and either it wouldn't change a thing or they couldn't sleep well or... Their ears slicked back as they glanced down at their paws, dragging one across the ground as the mustered up the courage to speak.

"Its um...Well, maybe advice wasn't the right word. Its... I'm tired. A lot. I don't... Sometimes I'm not tired at all. Sometimes I get randomly tired and need naps - not even long nap sometimes but then I'm fine! Sometimes I... I just sleep and sleep and even I wake up, I am still tired," they meowed, their body starting to quiver as shame crashed over them as they curled in on themselves. "Its stupid and such a kitish thing - that I can't keep my eyes open, that I fall asleep during ceremonies and Clan meetings. I thought...I thought it would go away when it first started but it has't and I- I don't know how I can be a warrior when..." They raised a paw, scrubbing at their face as a hiss escaped them.

"Its like it doesn't matter if I sleep well or not the night before. I don't...I don't want to be a burden to RiverClan! I... I don't want to be a reason for people to look down on us," they murmured, ears slicking back. "But I don't know what to do. I'm..I hate this. I hate how stupid this entire situation is...And how much it scares me. That its going to-" They cut off, ducking their head as they fought back the tears - memories slipping past. Of falling asleep in the snow, of their Clanmates fretting over them once they awoke and they told Duckpaw that they had collapsed - fainted - but they knew the truth. Of when they couldn't move when the beasts attacked and had to be saved yet again. What...What happened if nobody was around? Their next word was a quiet, terrified whisper.

"I don't want to die from this."

The comfort of meek intrusion quickly became concern. A slight frown crossed the medicine cat's face as he recognized the hesitation in his clanmate. Was there something he had done to make them worry about speaking with him? Duckpaw had come this far in wanting to address him. Aside from thoughts of personal offense, he could only think that it must have been something particularly troubling. Littlesplash waited patiently for the words to come from their maw. Concern shown in the depths of his mismatched gaze. He hoped that somehow he would be able to help his clearly downtrodden clanmate.

He was still and silent as he digested the words. Trembling in them caused his heart to clench as the thoughts turned in his head. As a medicine cat, his duty was to help fix and cure. It appeared there was something unnatural here, something he had never heard of, that was clearly impacting their every day life. Littlesplash blinked slowly as he tried to unpack everything the apprentice had just said. A lot seemed so far beyond the scope of what he could fix but that did not stop his determination to help, or at the very least relieve some of the worries and pain.

"Hey now," he meowed, taking a step forward to press his pelt to theirs. The tiny medicine cat positioned his head underneath their chin to lift it up before pulling back to meet Duckpaw's gaze, "none of that, alright? No one is going to... you know. Listen, I, uh..." Words escaped him. Littlesplash was young and inexperienced and that was obvious in different ways every day. He certainly didn't know all of the right things to say. Sandyshell likely would have. A soft sigh escaped his maw as he composed himself, trying to get the anxious thoughts to realign so he could thing straight.

"Duckpaw, I... don't have the answer. I'm sorry. But I want you to know I'm going to do everything I can to figure this out. We will figure this out. No matter how much time this takes. You're a Riverclan cat and being imperfect doesn't make you any less. I mean just look at my eye." His expression went from desperate explanation to a warm smile. He wanted to have enough hope for the both of them and the words were genuine, "I'll talk to the other medicine cats and consult Starclan. You come visit me anytime you're worried."

Duckpaw sniffled, trying to hide the tears that threatened to run down their face when Littlesplash closed the distance between them, lifting their head to lock their gazes at the medicine cat tried to calm them, even if it did quickly change to the bitter truth that the apprentice hadn't wanted. Of course Littlesplash didn't know, because it wasn't normal. It was the last thing they wanted to hear, that the medicine cat was just as lost as they were. Their ears pinned back as they fought the bitter feelings that wanted to rise up and consume them - anger over the lack of answers, over the lack of help.

...But it wasn't fair - not to Littlesplash. The medicine cat was offering help, just...Just not away. A shaky exhale escaped Duckpaw as they finally turned their gaze away, raising a paw to scrub at their face. "R-Right..." they finally managed, starting to feel embarrassed over their outburst, of everything they had been feeling laid bare. They felt...Raw and tired - but not in their standard tiredness. "I-I'm sorry. I don't know what I expected. If...If I even thought you would just...Know what to do - know what was w-wrong with me," they hiccuped, before their ears pinned back a little.

"...I-Is it all right if I maybe...Hang out with you sometimes? On...On days I don't know if I will be good for patrolling or...Or stuff. I could...Um, I could help with herbs? I-If you wanted to teach me, be an extra set of paws. Just while we...Um...Figure this out." There was another pause, before they ran a paw across the ground. "...Can you also not tell anybody? I-I mean you can tell the other medicine cats I guess but our Clanmates...? I don't... What if they don't take it seriously... What if they just call me lazy? I don't want to be this way, I don't like being tired randomly and I don't-" they cut themselves off, their whole body quivering as they curled in slightly on themselves. "T-Tell Perchstar an-and Poppyshine if you gotta but please, I don't... I don't want to be judged for what I can't control."