panthertails creation {edited}

Cat Name: pantherkit

Tom or She-Cat: she-cat

Favorite Warriors Character(s): cinderpelt, ravenpaw, bluestar, sandstorm

Familiarity with the series: I have read all of the “warriors” books, firestars quest, 2 and a half books of the new prophecy and I also have the guide “cats of the clans”

Appearance: soft, silky black pelt with blue eyes and long whiskers


Personality: Pantherkit is an energetic and brave kit who loves to hunt and has already caught her first mouse. She is also very intelligent but lacks in concentration.

Origins: thunderclan

RP Sample : Pantherkit sneaks to the opening of the nursery. her wide eyes meet something black and white. "whats that?" , she asks a fellow kit. "a badger," he says. "they are the most terrible beasts in the forests!"

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sorry i changed my username so it should be panthertails creation

It's all good except for the half-Clan part.

I don't know if they'll let that part through ;u;

ok should i edit that?

yay i found out how to edit it so it should be ok

Please don't double post! ^.^ Thanks! Also, welcome to WCC!

Sorry, but is anyone going to point out the not-past-tense part? ;3;

*derp*

Wow this is a good creation! Just a few things:

1. It's basically what Sleepy said: I'm not too sure about how well the half-clan thing will go with the admins, so we shall wait for word from Jay or Rain~ although it is preferred that a cat be full-blooded [insert clan name here].

2. You're role playing sample is a little short. Would you mind possibly adding a few more details and probably making it a little more realistic? It's not that it is a bad sample or anything, but kits would not be able to hunt adders. That would end up in a very bad situation... Also, on this site, we like to role play in 3rd person (which you have done) and also in past tense... like in the second part of your sample cx Just try to be careful and not switch between present and past tense~

Oh, and welcome to WCC :D

oh, that is what she meant... ono *deletes other post* YOU ALL SAW. NOTHING!*jedi mind trick*

lol srry il go edit it :chuuplz:

So this is really good, and I'm going to approve it, but you still need to fix your RP sample. Past tense means it already happened. You seem to be using a mixture of future and present tense, which is somewhat confusing. Past tense is the form that Erin Hunter uses in the Warriors series. For example:

Snowkit ran through the woods. She hoped to find out where her mom went.

If it were in present tense, like you were using, it would look like this:

Snowkit runs through the woods. She is hoping to find out where her mom is.

See the difference? Just try to work on that, and I'm sure anybody you role-play with will help you out if you need it. Welcome to WCC, and enjoy! ^^


Approved!

yea, weeks off of school has given me brain damage! lol jk