Plenty of Stars in the Sky {closed}

There was one thing that had been consistently bothering Himbo Bob. StarClan. Rude healer had been positive that Whitescar had died, but yet he was alive again. Not all Clan cats had multiple lives, either. Adderflare hadn't come back to life, no matter how much he pleaded she would. So, how did Whitescar have nine lives? There was only one explanation. StarClan was real. Whitescar had gone to StarClan and received his nine lives from StarClan because he was the leader of FlyClan. "Ashstorm?" The flame-point called. If StarClan were real, that meant Adderflare was there, and Ashstorm would be, too, when she eventually died (which he wouldn't let happen anytime soon) and... He wanted to be there with them. His parents had taught him that their ancestors decided where they went after death. Whether they stayed with their living loved ones, or wandered the lands, it was their choice. And... And he wanted to make a choice. To be with his family after death, and to watch after them. Even if it meant enduring cold glares from the rest of the dead Clan cats. He loved Ashstorm too much to part from her. He wouldn't lose her...

Not like he lost her.

Memories of his first mate made him frown. Her death from the black fox that dappled his back. His claws flexed the ground. He'd hoped Holly was happy wherever she roamed in death. "Ashstorm. Can we.. Talk?" He turned his broad, fluffy head around, shuffling to make room for her, passing her a corncockle flower and a poppy. He wanted to learn more about StarClan. Was there... Something you had to do to enter StarClan after you died? Either way, he wanted to learn more about them. How they act, if they were good cats, and if they would even take in an outsider. It was no lie to say the Clans despised the Asylum, but.. Himbo Bob just wanted to stay beside Ashstorm and Sparrowkit for the rest of his life. He was... content here. He had a family, and for the first time since Holly, he'd actually truly fell in love with another cat. "Can you.. Well, I mean- you don't have to but I think- what I'm trying to say is-" He sighed, shuffling his big paws in embarrassment. He'd asked her to come here and yet here he was, stumbling over his words.

He turned his gaze back to the creek in front of them, and then looked up at the sky. "Can you teach me about StarClan?" He finally asked, still eyeing the blue, cloud coated sky. Soft flurries of snow crunched beneath his feet as he nervously shifted his paws.

"Yes?" Ashstorm replied when she heard her name.  She noticed that Himbo Bob frowned, which made her slightly nervous of what he was thinking about.  When he passed her the corncockle and poppy she nodded thanking him.  "Of course we can talk, Himbob." She said that less enthusiastically than she meant to.  She listened, waiting for him to get the words out.  She wondered why whatever he was thinking about was hard for him to say.

Then, finally, he said that he wanted her to teach him about Starclan, but instead of answering right away, she needed to think for a moment...

Ashstorm had forgotten that the Asylum did not know what Starclan was.  She thought that Himbo Bob had always known about it.  It was something she did not think about too much cause she always sort of expected that every cat knew about it.  But then she remembered Dawnhawk talking about Starclan negatively and how that was one of the reasons he joined the Asylum.  Could her telling him about Starclan possibly make him seem like a traitor to the Asylum cats?  At this point she did not really care.  She would rather take that chance and be able to be with him forever than to not take that chance and never see him again after death... Not that she expected either of them to die anytime soon.

"Of course I can teach you about Skyclan.  As you probably know, it's a place were cats go after death.  I- I think any cat can go to Starclan as long as they have lived a honorable life and follow the Warrior Code."

The Warrior Code?  A horrible thing occurred to her.  Were they both being outside of the Warrior Code because they were mates?  Were they technically from different clans because she was a Skyclan cat and he was Asylum?  Even if this was the case, she knew she could not ask Starclan to forgive her when she still loved him.  She did not think it was breaking the Code considering that the Asylum took over all the clans, but maybe it was.  Maybe she was the one who ruined both of their chances to go to Starclan.

Another bad thought came.  The Warrior Code says that she should fight for her clan, was she not doing that by not fighting against the Asylum?  Although it also states that what the clan leader says is the Warrior Code.  How do I choose between two rules of the Warrior Code?  What is the right thing to do when nothing seems to be good?

She just hoped that Himbo Bob and her would both end up in Starclan and be together even in death.

"An honorable life, huh? Well, I don't think I've been a bad person. I haven't killed anyone -- and on your life, I wouldn't ever want to. Just hurting other cats makes me feel queasy. All I want is to stay by your side until I breathe my last. Be that in. Asylum, FlyClan, Twolegplace, as long as I'm with you, it'll be perfectly fine with me." Himbob's words were sincere and honest, and complete adoration shimmered in his eyes. "I don't ever want to walk a different path from you. Teach me the Warrior Code! Even if StarClan refuses me, I want to know I did everything I could to get there. So, please, Ashstorm. I'll do my best to learn, I promise."

Himbo Bob's blue eyes were begging, pleading, as he gazed down at her, desperate. "I'll do anything for you. I love you." It suddenly occurred to the ginormous tom that he hadn't said these words aloud to Ashstorm before; nor had he said them for quite a while. But they were true, and he meant them with his entire body, soul, heart, and spirit.

Ashstorm knew that Himbo Bob lived an honorable life.  He probably had a more honorable life than her.  Just because the cats above him told him to help with the Asylum takeover, that did not make him a bad cat, right?

"I want to be with you forever also!  No matter what happens I just want us to be together."

"I'll do anything for you.  I love you." She heard him say

He...loves me? Her mind repeated.  She could not remember anyone ever saying that to her.  Maybe some of her family members said it to her when she was younger, but nothing that she could remember.  She wanted to say it back.  She did love him.  For some reason it felt like she could not get the words out of her mouth.  She was afraid to say it back.  She did not know exactly what she was afraid of, but it felt like she could not say it back.  She then decided to try to change the subject.

She told him the Warrior Code, but paused before saying the last couple parts of the Warrior Code that she kept out.  "The last two are that cats should not hunt or go on a different clans territory," she explained.  She did not want to tell him.  As much as it pained her to admit, all Asylum cats were guilty of disobeying the Warrior Code for that reason.  "The last one is that a cat should defend their clan... No matter what happens."

She did not want to admit these to him, because both of them were guilty for at least one of them.  She waited for him to respond, hoping that he was not hurt by how she did not say I love you back.

Ashstorm didn't tell him back, but he knew that she did. He could see the fear in her eyes, along with the desire to say it back. Had no cat ever told her this before? He found it hard to believe. She was kind, beautiful, strong, and smart. Her compassion was one of the few things that made him want to call FlyClan his home-- Ferbo being the other. It kinda sounds like the Code of Mannerisms back home.. He thought, as she recalled the rule of kits, queens, and elders eating first. "This doesn't sound too hard.." He mused, listening intently.

Then she got to the last two.. Himbo Bob thought back, wondering if he'd hunted on other Clan territory. Hmmmm... No, he hadn't. "I've only hunted FlyClan prey," Himbob told her, breathing a sigh of relief. "And I'll defend you no matter what. If your loyalty lies with FlyClan then... So does mine. Always." It was true. Wherever Ashstorm was, Himbo Bob would protect her, and the place she called home. He loved her, and he loved Herbo Fedora, and they both loved FlyClan. And so, for as long as the love of his life and his daughter both lived here and loved this place, he would too.

Maybe, one day, FlyClan would become his home too.

Ashstorm smiled as he spoke.  "Well, then, Starclan will be happy to have you with them, eventually.  Your amazing and I'm sure that every cat in Starclan knows that." She hoped that he would not see the beauty of Starclan for many, many moons, but she was comforted knowing that they would always be together... even after they died.

"Although, Starclan cats probably won't enjoy it too much if you continue to call the clan that you'll fight for by the wrong name," she joked.  Her kits were going to be born soon, she knew that.  Everything seemed to be fairly peaceful, well, as peaceful as it could be when rogues try to take over the land.  But for some reason, Ashstorm felt like the peace would not last.