Wolfpaw's Moonstone Journey

(OOC: I apologize for the wait ;; )

Sagelight carefully made up the herb bundles in the privacy of his den, unable to keep himself from smiling. Today he would take his dear nephew to the Moonstone, and his chest swelled with pride. It was wonderful to be able to accompany his growing family on these important milestones in their lives. The medicine cat ate his bundle quickly, brushing off the bitter taste with a twitch of his fur. He took the honey-sweetened second bundle across camp to the apprentices' den and set it down outside the den, then poked his head in to look for Wolfpaw.

"Wolfpaw?" he mewed, padding into the den. He watched his footing carefully to make sure he didn't step on anyone, finally finding his nephew's sleeping form. He prodded the tom with one paw to wake him up. "Good morning, it's time to get up, we've got a big day ahead. Meet me outside, I have your herbs for you." He grinned in excitement and backtracked out of the den, waiting for his nephew to join him.

He smiled and nuzzled Wolfpaw with his cheek in a returned greeting. "These are for you! These are travelling herbs. They taste pretty bad, I will warn you, but I put some honey on there for you to help with the taste. After you're done, we can head out. We'll stop at the creek for a drink of water and then on to Highstones." He waited for his nephew to finish his herbs, then led the way out of camp. It would be a long journey but a very fulfilling one. It was exciting to think about his kin moving up in the Clan.

The journey to Highstones was luckily uneventful. Sagelight was grateful for keeping his body moving in the growing cold of approaching Leafbare, his mind racing with thoughts of what herbs he would need to restock on. He would need to watch for any sicknesses in the Clan; cats often got sick during Leafbare and it quickly would spread to other cats due to close proximity. The medicine cat occupied himself with chattering to Wolfpaw to ebb the silence in the forest. It was nice to have company.

They made it to Highstones in due time and Sagelight paused for a moment outside the entrance to the tunnel. He looked down at Wolfpaw with a smile, his blue eyes glittering. "Stay close by when we go in, okay? It's very dark in the tunnel to the Moonstone, make sure you follow my tail and stay close to the wall. You can feel your way with your whiskers. Once we get in to the cavern that holds the Moonstone, I will sit outside the entrance and you go in ahead of me. Touch your nose to the Moonstone and StarClan will come and speak to you. Ready?" His smile widened into a grin and he turned and led the way, his pawsteps sure and precise. He had come down this tunnel enough times to be able to navigate it with his eyes closed. Once they reached the cavern, Sagelight stopped and motioned for Wolfpaw to continue on with a flick of his tail, pride swelling in his chest. The Moonstone was already glowing, filling the chamber with its beautiful white light. The tom looked on, keeping watch over the apprentice until he was done.

Wolfpaw's eyes widened as they approached the tunnel, hackles raising involuntarily when a cold breeze from below ruffled his pelt. Anxious but not unwilling, he followed after Sagelight. There was a moment of fear when it became too dark to see, but his uncle's presence was reassuring, and Wolfpaw stuck close, trodding the back of the medicine cat's paws once or twice in his reluctance to get too far away. But it didn't last long - and when the cavern opened up before them, the moonstone glowing in the center of it, Wolfpaw had to suppress a gasp of wonder.

It was so beautiful.

"I'm ready," he breathed into the cavern, though his words were so quiet it was hard to hear him. The apprentice padded forward, paws carrying him to the glowing stone. He let his belly drop to the floor, crawling forward until his nose touched the frigid stone, and dropped into sleep.

There was a low-hanging fog that permeated the air just above the ground - barely hiding the rising, star-lit hills that made up StarClan's territory. The sky was painted in an eternal night, the stars twinkling and dancing through the dark, endless expanse - closer than one would ever see awaken in the living world. The apprentice was not alone, a sleek form stepping from what looked to be the sky itself, his white and gray pelt sparkling with stars. "Greetings, Wolfpaw," the tom purred as he approached, causing the fog - perhaps actually mist - to swirl around him. "My name is Storm that Lights the Clouds, but you may simply call me Storm...You may gather that it isn't a...Proper Clan name. I was not born in SkyClan - instead traveling down from the mountains when our home grew to dangerous and sought shelter, being ancestors of a SkyClan long forgotten." There was a pause as a sigh escaped Storm, shaking his head sadly.

"I was never given the chance to gain a proper warrior name before my life was taken by a roaming fox...And so I am here to bestow knowledge to those who will get the chance I never got, to be proper warrior of SkyClan. So enough about me. If you have a question, I am happy to give you an answer - perhaps settle a worry you have or perhaps an idea of what path awaits you. It is up for you to decide what you think you need to hear, young Wolfpaw."

Wolfpaw's eyes opened, and for a moment, he was afraid. No longer was he at the Moonstone, and his uncle was nowhere to be seen. It was... warm here, too, like Greenleaf. He flexed his claws into the soft, warm dirt, looking around... and then he noticed the other cat, seemingly appearing from the mist. The apprentice listened in awe as the tom spoke, eyes wide and mouth slightly agape. He was talking to a real StarClan cat.

But the offer that the starry tom spoke of was not an easy one. Here he had the chance to find out something that only StarClan knew... so what did he ask? The dark apprentice let his eyes fall to the ground, his earthly worries finally finding their way to his heart in this ethereal ground, too. "My clan..." he started, Foxfire and Spottedstar and Honeypaw flashing through his mind's eye. "The cats I love, they're in trouble. There's... there's a war coming, and I'm scared. I don't want them to get hurt... or, or... die." That last word was spoken with such horror that it made Wolfpaw shudder, eyes burning at the thought of it. He swallowed hard, lifting his amber gaze to meet Storm's. "How do I help them?"

There was a long silence as Storm stared at him, before a soft sigh escaped the star-pelted tom. "I know your agony rather well. I watched my friends and family be picked off by a beast we had no hope to kill until we were forced to surrender our home and seek shelter among the Clans. I made it my life goal to protect those I cared about, to keep them from doing anything dangerous but..." He flickered open his eyes, his gaze cold as he stared at him. "There is such a thing as too much protection. When you grow so attached to your vision of helping others until you are so blind that you cannot see how you are smothering them, that you cannot see that what you want is not always going to come to pass... You will be a warrior soon enough, Wolfpaw, you have trained hard so that you can be there at their side and fight to protect them. But know, as much as it hurts, it will not be enough. Life is unfair, cruel, and you will sadly have to watch those you care for die...but you must be willing to let them die as themselves."

There was a heavy pause before he shook his head. He knew his words weren't a comfort but he had seen what a strong desire to protect others could do - it had tricked one of the sweetest cats he had known to accidentally unleash a great evil upon the Clans. He had spent every waking moment that he had to try to protect his Clanmates, putting them above himself but what good did that do to him in the end? He had been so weak, so focused on protecting others...He had failed to protect himself. "You have a good heart, Wolfpaw. I know my words may not be what you wanted to hear. You will be able to protect many lives as a warrior but you must always be aware that it will not always be enough. But if they die as themselves, doing what they wanted to do - fighting for a cause they believe in, then they die happy - and you must be willing to accept that. Nobody will ever hold that against you, even if you want to think that they all do. But you also must protect yourself - do not carry the weight of everything on your own shoulders and not seek out help. Let others protect you as you seek to protect them. Do not let your desire to protect be a burden, young Wolfpaw. Otherwise, it may smother you as well."

Wolfpaw shook his head, refusing to acknowledge what the StarClan cat was saying. "What use is power, is becoming a warrior, if I can't protect my clan?" he demanded. His eyes traced the ground, breath quickening in distress. All he wanted was to ensure the success and safety of SkyClan, and here this StarClan cat was telling him he was wasting his time? That if cats were going to die, he should let them do it their own way? Why did they have to die at all? If StarClan was all powerful, why wouldn't they help him protect them?

The apprentice turned away from Storm, lashing his tail in very uncharacteristic anger. He'd started this Moonstone journey full of hope, and wonder, but now, he just felt hollow. "No cat wants to die in battle, to leave their lives unfinished," he said flatly, refusing to meet the starry tom's eyes again. "I won't accept that. I'll find a way, if you won't help me."

Storm titled his head, raising an eyebrow as he stared at the tom. "I am not saying to let the cats who will die unfair, unneeded deaths to their fate, young one. I am saying that there are those who would take pride in dying for their Clan, to protect others as much as you want to protect them," he stressed. Perhaps he had worded his intent poorly, he had never been one for...Comforting others, being a protector and a fighter to the end. Communication...That had been better left for the Stoneteller. "That you must allow them to fight for what they want to fight for - even at the risk of their deaths, if that is what they are willing to accept. Your Clanmates want to fight for their Clan, you can do what is best to try to spare them but you also must accept that there is always a risk of failure."

There was a long pause, before he sighed as he lowered his head. "...Long ago, there was a she-cat I loved. She was the most beautiful and lovely cat that I ever laid eyes on. She was an adventurer, one to climb to the highest peak to explore the world... She died an unfair death when an eagle swooped at her and knocked her from a cliff when watched to watch the sun-rise. I let that mistake, of not stopping her, haunt me for nearly my entire life. But she knew the risk when she made that choice to climb - if I held her back, made sure she had never done anything that dangerous again...Then she would have never gotten the chance to be the she-cat I loved her as, the true adventure she wanted to be. Would she had listened to me even if I had tried harder? What I am saying, young one, is that you must let your Clanmates make their own choices, no matter how hard it might be, even if the risk of their own demise is there. Be there to protect them, to save their lives but do not let them dying making a choice they've accepted the dangers of and wanted to do anyways haunt you like it did me."

As Storm finished his speech, Wolfpaw immediately was ashamed at the anger he'd shown towards the StarClan cat. After all - Storm didn't need to be here offering him any guidance. He'd chosen to be, and now Wolfpaw felt foolish and ungrateful.

"I'm sorry," he murmured, letting his dark shoulders slump in defeat. "I just... I am scared of seeing them hurt anymore than they have been already, and..." he trailed off, "I don't want to lose anyone."

Storm glanced up, a soft look spreading across his face as he took a step forward to rest his muzzle on the top of the young apprentice's head. "Nobody ever wants to face that moment - even the most harden cats have those who their heart will break over. But embrace the moments you do have with them, do not waste a breath on what could have been, young Wolfpaw. Do what you can to protect those around you, but do not waste long mourning them...As they will want you to move on and truly live. This is never an easy lesson to learn, it will never be one you will find comfort truly in...But you can learn how to deal with the pain, and be yourself as much as they will be theirs." There was a faint rumble in the sky, causing the StarClan tom to take a step back as he glanced toward the stars. "It seems my time is up. I do not expect you to come to terms with this lesson, but to simply take it to heart and think it over. To find the path that the stars have aligned for you. It may take you to places you never imagined, little one," he meowed.

With that, he turned and padded away, disappearing into the mist...And leaving Wolfpaw to wake up on his own.

In an instant, Wolfpaw was awake. The warmth of StarClan melted away, leaving him shivering in the cave beside the Moonstone. The dark apprentice fluffed up his coat to ward off the chill, rising to his paws and staring at the Moonstone with baleful eyes. He hadn't learned what he wanted to hear, no way to stop the battle between ShadowClan and SkyClan.

A short sigh escaped him as he turned to reconvene with Sagelight, attempting to wipe the forlorn expression from his face as he said, "Alright, ready to go."