Accusations (Closed)

Usually in her life, Curlyfeather didn't have a choice. Either she acted before she could think, or something happened to her through no fault of her own. But now she had a choice. Face the small possibility of humiliation, or let a probable codebreaker off the hook. It wasn't an easy choice, but she had made up her mind. After talking with Blazeflight, it had only become more clear. Her former mentor had gotten into a forbidden romance with a ThunderClanner, and had now threatened her not to tell anyone. Why would she listen? Keeping it a secret would be almost as bad as committing one in the first place, and the clan deserved to know. Scorchfang was the deputy, and a cat she trusted with her life. He would make a good decision, she was sure of it. Now all she to wonder was why she had waited. Last night had been her talk with the three-legged she-cat, and now it was nearly morning. Maybe she had just forced herself to mull over this for a night. Why? She knew she was stubborn, and once she made a decision, she hardly ever abandoned it. So basically she had condemned herself to a night full of suffering over a decision she had already made. What was up with that? The moment the light of the sun showed even a little over the horizon, she stood up from her nest, realizing she hadn't slept at all. Of course, after getting up in the middle of the night to awaken and confront a cat who she knew was probably a codebreaker didn't help her to sleep. Exactly the opposite. Stretching her back wearily, she padded over to the sleeping form of the deputy, trying to stay mostly quiet. Nobody except for her had already waken up, and she wanted to talk to the black tabby for a little before everybody was up. Nudging his back slightly, she leaned over and hissed in his ear.
"I need to talk to you." Curlyfeather tried her best to rid herself of all the painful remnants of doubt the moment she spoke, but found her efforts to be in vain. Why did StarClan have to curse her with this burden? It wasn't fair, after everything that had already happened to her in her life. Waiting for Scorchfang to join her, she clawed at the dirt, as if somehow it was the mud's fault that she was in this predicament. If only she hadn't been so nosy! It the exact thing she hated about other cats! But at least no she was probably helping to bring a codebreaker to justice, right? She prayed that the deputy would arrive soon and she could just cut to the chase instead of having to think about everything over and over again. at least this cat could understand her and communicate with her easily, and it wouldn't be a struggle like it was with Blazeflight. Hopefully, at least.

Scorchfang blinked open his eyes at the nudging, and the fur along his back stood on end as a voice tickled the hairs in his ear. It took him a few heartbeats to register just what was happening, and he immediately calmed down. It was Curlyfeather, and she needed to talk to him about something. He already knew this couldn't be anything good. After all, it wouldn't be like the deaf warrior to wake him up in the middle of the night just for a round of idle gossip.

He stood up and carefully tiptoed around his fellow sleeping denmates, then slipped outside into the open, the bright, nearly full moon up above making his black fur shine silver. He quickly found the gray tabby in question and approached her with a flick of his tail that went along with his question. "What is it?"

OOC: It’s early morning now.

“I think Blazeflight is in a forbidden romance with the new ThunderClan deputy.” That was a rather long sentence for her, but Curlyfeather wanted to get it out in one breath before she could reconsider for a second longer. Now it was out, and the tiniest bit of relief greeted her. Still, that was minuscule in comparison to the anxiety she still felt over the entire situation. Good thing she was talking to Scorchfang and not Littlestar; she didn’t know how she would have kept her composure in that situation. Looking straight into the deputy’s eyes, she hoped he could tell she was dead serious. This was not a matter to fool around with. She wondered if she should give her evidence right then, but decided to wait until she was asked. Talking when not necessary was something that she hated to do. So she waited.

(OOC: SOOOOO sorry for the ridiculously late reply!)

This was not what the tom expected to hear at all. Scorchfang blinked several times in sheer surprise, unsure if he had heard her correctly. Yet the words she had spoke were clear as day even if she weren’t able to hear them herself. Blazeflight? Having an affair with a ThunderClan cat? And their deputy of all cats?

...No, there had to be a mistake. There just had to be. Blazeflight was one of Scorchfang’s best friend, and he knew she wouldn’t ever do something like that. ...But then again, he himself had done such a thing even if many cats may not have ever expected it from their own deputy. What if Curlyfeather wasn’t wrong after all? But then again, what if she was?

”...I’ll talk to her,” was all he could say in response to this startling accusation. He didn’t know what to believe really, but he knew he still wouldn’t jump to conclusions, not until he had heard from both she-cats. He dipped his head to Curlyfeather, then padded off in search of Blazeflight.

He found his friend rather quickly, and he approached her to meow softly to her, as to not alert any wandering ears of their discussion. ”Blazeflight, I need to talk to you.”

Blazeflight's expression immediately went from happy and rather bubbly, to confusion... And even a little fear. "I... Okay...?" She sensed the tom wanted to speak to her privately, so she immediately began padding towards the exit of camp, with him by her side. Her paws hit the ground with more than a bit of hesitation, and she slowly made her way out of the camp. When they were a few foxlengths from the exit- which took longer for her to reach than it would for any other cat- she turned to face Scorchfang. "W-what about?"

Curlyfeather nodded to Scorchfang, not understanding the words he said but taking the dip of his head to mean he would talk to her. Sitting down, she watched the dark colored tom approach Blazeflight and sighed, looking down at her paws. All of the sudden her face heated up, as if she had made a horribly embarrassing mistake and had just been caught. It wasn't like she had been proven wrong or right yet, but with the accusation out there, it suddenly felt like it was just her luck for this all to be a huge misunderstanding. But now it was no longer in her paws. If everything she had done turned out to be wrong, then she had no way of fixing it now. Turning back was no longer a humiliating option, but not an option at all. Now literally all she could do was stare at her paws and hope for the best. Some instinct inside of her wanted her not to be seen when the deputy told the ginger she-cat what her accusation was. Just looking in her eyes if she was wrong would hurt so much.

Scorchfang heaved a heavy sigh. He loved Blazeflight like a younger-older sister, and he hoped in his heart that Curlyfeather's accusations were false... but at the same time, he really respected Curlyfeather for her determination and will to never give up, even with her disability. Why couldn't Littlestar have been walking along Curlyfeather's path? Why couldn't she have taken care of this issue? At least then he wouldn't have to disappoint or upset either one of his close friends.

"First and foremost, I'm going to keep the cat who told me this anonymous. I don't need any fur flying after this conversation. Now, Blazeflight, I'm about to ask you a difficult question, and as not only your friend, but also your deputy, I need you to answer truthfully and without hesitation." Taking a deep breath, he meowed, "Are you or are you not in love with Marshstorm of ThunderClan?"

'Are you or are you not in love with Marshstorm of ThunderClan?' Blazeflight's ears were laid back onto her head in a show of frustration, and she shook her head, signifying relief. "Scorchfang, I... I don't... I'm assuming that it was Curlyfeather that warned you of this, no? I'll explain." She sat down in front of the larger, much fluffier tom, relief shining through any other emotions on her face. She thought she'd done something terrible, something that she'd be in serious trouble for. "Marshstorm, ThunderClan's Deputy, and I, go way back, Scorchfang. He is a former ShadowClanner, who was lost. His paws led him to ThunderClan, where he now resides. While on a border patrol, the two of us came across each other near the Thunderpath. We shared a few courteous words, spoke about the prey, and then departed. Curlyfeather, however, was watching the ordeal from the cover of a bush." She mewed, looking into her best friend's bright orange eyes.

Before continuing, she breathed out another sigh of relief. "She came to me, just last night. She wanted to know what was happening between the two of us," Blazeflight opted to leave out the part about Curlyfeather demanding answers and proceeded to finish what she had to say. "Curlyfeather is an amazing cat who lived up to all the training that I'd given her as an apprentice. But despite being one of the bravest, most loyal cats I know, it is obvious that her luck does not match her abilities in the slightest. While I was trying to explain that Marshstorm and I have no connection beyond being distant and past friends, she misunderstood my words. I could tell she had as she walked away, but I... I didn't want to offend her..." She trailed off as she looked down at her paws, avoiding her close friend's gaze as best as the blazen she-cat could. "I'm sorry, Scorchfang... I should have said something..." She shook her head in disgust. Scorchfang likely didn't know her former-apprentice like she did, and Blazeflight knew that when Curlyfeather caught wind of the fact that she'd been wrong in a situation as serious as this... It wouldn't be pretty.

Scorchfang's ears drew back in sympathy for both she-cats. He was so incredibly relieved that Blazeflight hadn't done anything wrong, that she remained true and loyal to the warrior code... but it mustn't have felt good to have your own former apprentice accuse you of something as severe as being caught in a forbidden romance. And Curlyfeather... She was just trying to do right by the code, and by the Clan, by revealing her concerns, however wrong they had been. How was she going to take this? He knew her pride was constantly being wounded by the mistakes she's made because of her lack of hearing. What if this was the final push to make her... give up completely?

The deputy bowed his head to the older warrior. "Thank you for telling me the truth, Blazeflight. I'm glad to know that you're just as honest and loyal as the day you were introduced into ShadowClan. I... suppose I'll have to tell Curlyfeather now." This wasn't going to be easy. Not at all.

Sighing, he turned and padded over to Curlyfeather -- there was no use confronting her later in private, as Blazeflight already knew who the accuser was -- and when he stood before her he slowly shook his head. "No forbidden romance."

When you spend half an hour working on a long and emotional post and it deletes itself:

Even though Curlyfeather couldn't hear the words that Scorchfang was saying, the meaning was so clear that it cut deep into her. But for a short moment, relief fell over her. Blazeflight was a good cat. Then an overwhelming feeling of shame drowned out all relief she had been feeling. What in StarClan's name had she just done? Accused an innocent can of a horrendous crime while having no evidence? Yes, that was exactly what she had just done. And it was because of her lack of hearing. If only she had been able to actually hear the encounter at the Thunderpath, or understand anything that she had been told. Her hearing had ruined her life again, and she hated it. Hatred was not strong enough of a word right then. Rage at her missing ears built up inside of her, growing and growing until suddenly it stopped. Not how angry she was, but what that fury was directed towards. It was all her own fault, and she couldn't blame her disability for everything. This was completely her own fault. No other deaf cat would assumed the worst about a cat they had cared about. They would have seen things as they were at the border, understood what was actually going on during the interrogation. Any other deaf cat wouldn't have been so insecure to believe that the three-legged she-cat could do such a thing. With a jolt, she suddenly realized just how weak she was. Not just physically, but of her mind as well. Weak enough to believe the first thing that came to mind no matter how little reason she had for it. And on top of that, she made so many huge decisions based on those far-fetched assumptions. What had she been thinking? Vibrating with an emotion that she couldn’t quite name, she could see how much of a failure she really was. For all she knew, lives could have been ruined because of reckless decisions that she, a stubborn she-cat, made for reasons she didn’t even know. How was she supposed to be a great warrior when the only thing she ever did was ruin everything? How could she ever be the hero that she wanted to be if she constantly played the role as the villain? By now she couldn’t even blame her deafness for all the stupid mistakes she kept making. No, this was all her fault, and nobody else was to blame. Now her reputation would be ruined, and she deserved it. The clan would probably be better off without her. Of course, if anyone had said that to her, she would have absolutely destroyed them. But didn't that just prove what she was thinking? That she was so paranoid and defensive that she became the horrible cat she feared she would become? After all, she had just accused her former mentor of this scandalous crime? What would she do next, think the entire clan was plotting some evil scheme? All these thoughts became too much, and her anger needed to explode. But she couldn't allow that to happen. She had already been embarrassed enough for one day, she couldn't let the rest of the clan know how much this upset her. Because as weak as she was, she was terrified of everyone else thinking she was anything but tough.
"Okay," Curlyfeather replied to what Scorchfang had said. Even without her hearing, she could easily tell that her voice had cracked badly. Oh great, she was already failing. Pushing past the deputy, she headed towards the warrior's den, hoping to just lay back down and pretend to be asleep. Everything would be so much easier that way. But she knew that she couldn't. Blazeflight was in there, and she knew she would definitely break if she saw that she-cat again right now. Dashing for someplace to hide, she quickly hid behind the medicine den, feeling he breath coming in ragged pants. No, she was better than this, she had to be! Sobbing was not the way to fix a problem that she had created! Already she had become lower than she ever wanted to be, but she couldn't let her clanmates know that. She just couldn't. So there she sat, trying to control her panicked breathing, knowing she had become a monster. And knowing that she couldn't let anyone know that. Never again would she make this stupid of a mistake, she silently vowed. Because this feeling of being such a failure in addition to he disability was killing her more and more every day.

OOC: Scorch and Maple don't have to post again if you don't want to

Froststone had been asleep, no surprise there. He had had a long day of patrols. He didn't mind, just helping his clan out in any way possible now that he was a warrior. He had recently moved to the Warriors Den. Usually, if there were sleeping cats, there wasn't much talking. Tonight though was a different story. The whispers of a cat woke him up, and he opened one blue eye to see Curlyfeather speaking to the deputy. They stepped out. He raised his head and looked at the sky. It was starting to get lighter, it was early morning. He decided to get up anyway, no use in going back to sleep when he would be on a patrol soon anyway. He stepped out of the Warrior's den while shaking his white fur.  He began to overhear the conversation between Scorchfang and... Blazeflight? He sat, grooming himself while he listened to the story. That was quite rude of Curlyfeather to just accuse Blazeflight of that. He flicked his ears in annoyance, but then saw another odd thing. Curlyfeather running off behind the medicine den. He watched her disappear behind it. This wasn't his fight, but he didn't want to see her just running away from her problems.

He padded behind the medicine cat's den, seeing Curlyfeather sitting there. "Hi, Curlyfeather. Sorry I couldn't help but overhear what happened. Sorry about that I just woke up while you were all talking but I'm just a bit curious." He fiddled with his tail, feeling sorry for the she-cat. "Why did you accuse Blazeflight of that... with zero proof? Why do you think she was guilty? Just..." He trailed off a bit. He would've said something else but just the look on Curlyfeather's face showed that she was quite unhappy. Normally he wouldn't get in this business but accusing another clanmate of something like that is just... not right. Not without evidence.

"What the Dark Forest are you talking to me for?" Curlyfeather's voice was bitter, and quieter than usual. Most of the time she was louder than she intended to be, but right then she was just above a whisper. Not that she could tell, thanks to the scars on her head where her ears should be. Her entire life, even before going deaf, she had been angry at herself. And every time, instead of facing that self-loathing, she had taken it out on someone else. Someone who pointed out her shortcomings instead of letting her deal with it. And that morning it was no different. Frost.. what was his warrior name again? Bone? No, stone. Froststone apparently didn't realize that one couldn't simply talk normally to a deaf cat. That fact alone was enough to anger her in he current state, but she could just barely read his lips. Accuse Blazeflight... zero proof?... Why... guilty? Even though she could only really understand six words he said, they were enough to make her understand. Was he really asking her this? Did it really make him feel better to ask about this? At least Scorchfang had been polite enough not to. Again, rage made her vibrate as her blue eyes seemed to crackle as she stared at him angrily. Usually she kept her sentences short to stop herself from feeling strange, but this was a special case. So much anger was stored inside of her and it needed to be let out. This tom was asking for it. He was really, really asking for it. Nobody but herself got to hate her. Not. A. Soul. Her voice was low and threatening, a quiet rage rather than a fiery one. "You mousebrained foxheart. First you eavesdrop, now you clean up by nosing around for information that is none of your business. I absolutely despise cats like you. Why did I accuse Blazeflight with zero proof, you ask? I'm actually rather surprised I managed to understand that, seeing as you have no idea how to be at all clear when talking to deaf cats. Why would I say she's guilty? Well, I have an answer for you." With those words, she stepped closer to him, somehow making her tiny self seem more intimidating than a badger ever could. Looking dead into his eyes from a whisker away, her fake aura of calm exploded. "BECAUSE I MADE A MISTAKE! Does that make you happy? Are you still wondering what happened? Do you still care? You come up to me and act like you have never misunderstood anyone before, with the audacity to blame this all on me! You ask why I did it, and I gave you a simple answer, when you didn't even need one! You should have never poked around in business that wasn't yours!"
"GO AWAY!" What Curlyfeather did next surprised her. So caught up in her anger, she wasn't thinking straight. Her head was filled with a familiar screeching sound, and everything looked like she was in a dream. Her whole head felt dehydrated. But the rage didn't stop. Before she could consider what she was doing, her paw had raised high into the air, the morning light glinted off of her unsheathed claws. Then all of the sudden they were coming down, slicing right through Froststone's fur. Hardly any blood emerged from the wound, but small pieces of fur flew right off, tips crimson with blood. Looking at the blood on the tips of her claws, the deaf warrior felt shocked. What had she just done?

OOC: that moment when you didn't know the cat you were talking to was deaf, i thought she just had bad hearing so thats kinda my bad but i dont think Froststone would know her well enough to really know anyway

IC: Froststone kept his expression blank. He had not meant to eavesdrop, he simply overheard and was quite curious. Then she started pouring insults out at him. This... he had not quite expected. He had hoped she would've kept a level head about this, but she didn't she just exploded on him. She got right in his face. His expression changed to surprise. He actually hadn't known she was deaf. And now he felt awful. He had assumed that her ears had simply gotten clawed off. He supposed that could hurt the hearing but he hadn't known she was completely deaf. She then got in his face, and he glared at her. If she thought that she could just yell at him for asking a simple question. He understood she was upset but threatening him? Then she went on about how he blamed her? He said no such thing! He began an apology and now she would hopefully be able to read his lips better "Curlyfeather I'm so so-"

She clawed him. She had actually attacked him. It was nothing deep, but it stung like crazy. He hissed, not at her, just in pain. He didn't really know how to react. He felt like he deserved this for overhearing, but then he felt like he needed to report her to someone... He glanced at the look on her face. He didn't want to pity her, but she looked overwhelmed. He sighed. He would feel... bad - to tell her off. To tell someone. He tried to allow her to read his lip better when he said this. "Curlyfeather. I'm sorry that I overheard you. I feel like I deserve this, but it stings like crazy. I'm not going to tell the deputy unless you want to attack or yell at me again. I've already apologized now." He tried to smile at her, but faltered. To be honest he was angry at her. It was a simple question, but then he was angry at himself. He had overheard a conversation he shouldn't have overheard.

"I am sorry." It had been a long time since Curlyfeather had said those words, at least without a trace of sarcasm. Her voice was sincere, a note a fear mixed in. "I'm so sorry. This is my fault. I-I'm not mad at you. Please just forget about all of this." Through all these words, she still looked at her claws, and the small about of Froststone's blood on the tips. Finally, she sheathed her claws and looked up at the warrior's face. What she saw was something she recognized right away. Anger hidden by a nervous smile. Oh foxdung. Foxdung foxdung foxdung. She had messed up. This was a feeling she never wanted to make any clanmate of her's feel. Sure, she had acted like she hated him with all her soul, but she hadn't actually been yelling at him. In fact, she had been yelling at herself the entire time. All the anger and hatred she had felt towards her own self had come out in the form of yelling at a random warrior. Yes, she was mad at him for approaching her about this, but if it was just that she would have started with telling him to go away. No, that was her anger about her own personal problems, not him. Yet she had bullied, even attacked him. Her clanmate! With a start she remembered the dream she had a long time ago. Looking in a pool of blood to see herself, covered in her clanmate's blood, laughing maniacally as she slaughtered her clanmates, crows cawing cruelly all around her. This was way too close to that version of herself. Had her fear of becoming like that what made this happen? Dimly aware that the tom was talking to her, correctly this time, she felt a bit thankful, but too stressed to pay attention. Was he scared of her? His failed smile clearly showed that he was angry but didn't want to show it. Why? Did he think she would continue to attack her? Was that what all of her clanmates would think of her now. Most importantly, would they be right? Fear growing in her blue eyes, she took a few steps back. After causing so many problems and accusing an innocent she-cat, she had attacked a cat defending accusations that she knew were true. If that didn't make her evil, what would? Now she was sure that she wasn't just a burden for the clan to carry, but she was dragging them down with her mistakes. Nothing about this was right. The clan should kick her out. She did nothing to help them anyway. Then the realization hit her. If she left, they wouldn't have to. If she left, everything would be okay. But if she left the clan, she would have to alone knowing what she had done to ShadowClan, maybe holding them back forever. That would torture her. While she knew she deserved it, she also knew that wouldn't help anyone. No, she would leave, and soon she would be happy. In StarClan.
"This is not your fault, it's mine. I have to go." With those words, Curlyfeather took off across camp, sprinting out of the entrance. One advantage her small size gave her was speed, something she was grateful for. Maybe someone would try to follow her, and stop her. That couldn't happen. This was for the good of everyone, the clan and herself. And as much as she hated it, she wouldn't even have the chance to say goodbye to Cedarstorm. But it was the only way.