A Fallen Rose »Rosepaw is dead«

Minnowpaww slowly carried the limp body of the black and white tuxedo she-cat, a former apprentice of the clan with the help of one of the younger apprentices Silentpaw... She sighed and carried the body to the middle of camp before she dropped it and tryedd to smile a little toward Silentpaw but she ccouldn't not now atleast, now wasn't the time. She then took a deep breath and called out to the clan loudly "Rosepaw is dead!", she then sat down and a tear slowly rolled down her face.

Silentpaw was really only half there. Everything was moving in slow motion and honestly she didn't realize they were near the camp until they had come across it's thorny entrance. She couldn't stop hearing that gut wrenching crack over and over. A chill had descended upon her, but not the chill of the wind or the leaf-bare snow that she had known all of her life so far. The apprentice had never felt this chill before. She didn't know how to process this. Instinctively her dull azure eyes sought out one of her family members. Rowantalon... Crowfur... Scorchfang... Wildpaw... anyone. Had they felt like this before? Her thoughts were hazy, almost detached. A distant part of her registered fear at this realization, however it too was quickly swallowed up by the numbness of the situation.

No... no... no...
This couldn't be happening.
Perhaps it was another Rosepaw. Yeah, maybe that was it. No, it couldn't be, there were no cats that shared the same name in the Clan. Newtface felt his throat begin to clog and fog begin to cloud his vision as he heard Minnowpaw shout out the words 'Rosepaw is dead'. She couldn't possibly be dead. She could've been an incredible warrior... and he could've hunted alongside her even more. He could've finally been able to tell her how he truly felt. Supposedly, the term 'you never miss someone until they're gone' was true in this case. The speckled tom shakily rose to his paws from where he lay in the warriors' den and slowly poked his head out. Perhaps it was all a silly apprentice prank. However, it was to his great dismay that it wasn't. She really was dead. Her body was there, limp, helpless, unmoving, and the sight chilled Newtface to the bone. At first, he couldn't move... he couldn't speak, and he couldn't react. He was petrified, and all he could do was stare. Colors seemed to flood his vision and emotions seemed to tug at his heart. Anger, sadness, disbelief, fear... it was all there.

Then, the tom suddenly exploded forwards with a loud wail that echoed throughout the camp. He sprinted towards Silentpaw, Minnowpaw, and Rosepaw's corpse. No matter how much he wanted to hide it, tears were blurring his sight and dripping down onto the ground. She was really dead. She had such a life ahead of her! Why did StarClan have to take her so incredibly soon? Rosepaw had been so close... so close to warriorhood.
"NO!" Newtface screamed, staring down with wide, yellow eyes at Rosepaw's cold, deceased figure, "NO... NO! ROSEPAW, PLEASE, PLEASE...."
His voice suddenly dropped to an ominously quiet volume, "Please... wake up."

No matter how much he begged, the calico cat inwardly knew that she'd never wake up. All of his screaming was practically for nothing. The warrior lowered his head and began to sob. He crouched down, and buried his face into Rosepaw's fur. She could've been his mate, and he could've been his. They could've had kits together. He could've watched them grow, and he could've watched them have grandkits. It was all an impossible future, now. He had never had the chance to tell her before, and Rosepaw had probably been just as confused as he had been... but he couldn't just let her spirit wander around in StarClan without knowing the truth.
"Rosepaw," Newtface whispered quietly in her ear, "I-I love you."

Minnowpaw looked at Newtface and ten nudged him gently "She loved you too.. I'm so sorry we couldn't save her.... Before I knew she where racing over the Thunder path and then there came a monster and then.." she stopped and looked down she wished she never had to see something like that again.

Newtface sorrowfully lifted his yellow gaze so that he could look at Minnowpaw once she nudged him. However, his expression changed to a sudden, burning anger.
"WHY?!" He shouted, "Why couldn't you save her? There were two of you! How could you let her die?!"
The speckled tom felt as if thousands of ants were crawling through his fur and biting him repeatedly. He turned around so that he faced away from Minnowpaw, Silentpaw, and Rosepaw's unmoving corpse.
"This... th-this is why I never should've fallen in love. I did it anyway! I decided to follow my stupid heart instead of my head, and then this happens!"
He shot the two apprentices a vehement glance over his shoulder, "Rosepaw could still be alive if it wasn't for you two being so slow and careless."

Minnowpaw hissed loudly "Don't you blame us! Did we run over the Thunder path? No Rosepaw did! And if we would have followed her you could have had three dead clan mates insted! But you don't seem to care! Everyone falls in love at some point and you can't help it. But love is no excuse to get mad at others. Do you think I wanted her to die? Do you think I want to see her lifeless body laying here? If I could I would have saved her, just because you loved her doesn't mean you're the only one who cares about her, she where my best friend. You where not the one who saw her body get crushed by the monster, we where and I will never forget what I saw.
never.."

Newtface watched as Silentpaw made a dash out of camp. Somewhere deep down in his heart, he felt sorry for the young apprentice. He felt regret for the anger that he expressed towards her and Minnowpaw, and he wanted so badly to apologize. However, his pride, as per usual, bubbled to the surface and blinded the tom of anything else. The speckled tom tore his gaze away from the camp exit as Minnowpaw jumped in to speak, and a cold glare seeped back onto his face.

"Being a warrior is about bravery. You should've at least tried to help. I bet you stood there like a sitting duck and watched as Rosepaw got hit by a monster. Love is pathetic, but love is strong. Love is so strong that it even managed to pull me into its cold claws, but never again. I'm not going to let myself be tricked by something so artificial ever again. I've learned my lesson, and now I'm never making the same mistake, again."

Newtface then shook his head, closing his eyes, "Forget it, I'm finished. The elders can bury her, or something. I'm done trying to talk to you. Maybe watching Rosepaw's dead body will bring you more shame then I could ever verbally give you. Maybe, next time I see you in trouble, I'll simply sit there with wide eyes and not even try to help. You better hope that another cat is with you if your life is ever at risk."

The calico tom then turned around and stalked back to the warriors' den. He didn't even feel the hard bite of grief tearing away at his heart anymore. He just felt empty. That was fine, though. As long as there was no room for emotion, there was no room for heartbreak, and there was no room for pain.

She glared at him "That's it? You said you loved her but still you leave it to the elders to bury her? Who know what? Imma find Silentpaw and we are gonna bury her! She deserves to be buried by people that where her friends, not someone that she barley knew! You are such a fox-heart Newtface!
And if I ever are in a situation where I could die you wouldn't be there because I refuse to go anywhere with you" she yelled after him before she walked up to the camp entrance and yelled out "Silentpaw! Don't lisent to that fox-heart, come back! Help me bury Rosepaw.." she looked around after a sign of the young apprentice.

Scorchfang watched the entire exchange in mortified silence. Yet another of his Clanmates were dead. He had never known Rosepaw as well as some of the others, but he still knew how close she was to Minnowpaw. Seeing the sadness in his future mate's eyes absolutely crushed him, and he was hurt even more at Silentpaw's own expression. If he knew her, she'd probably be taking all the blame for Rosepaw's death. He flinched at the heated exchange between Newtface and Minnowpaw, which ended in the tom stalking away.

As much as he wanted to comfort Minnowpaw and Silentpaw, he knew that the two of them would be able to comfort each other. Newtface would have no one. He turned to the warriors' den and slowly approached. "Newtface? It's Scorchfang. I hope you don't mind, and I know we don't know each other too well, but... do you want to talk? It'll be much better than bottling up your emotions."

Newtface squeezed his eyes shut as he heard Scorchfang's footsteps approach, but he didn't bother to look back at the tom. He didn't even feel like speaking to any other cats, but the fact that the other warrior had decided to come speak to him made the tortoiseshell tom feel a bit of warmth inside. He didn't show it, though. He wanted desperately to not show that he felt guilty for yelling at Silentpaw and Minnowpaw - he didn't want to seem like a coward. What could Newtface even say? What was there to talk about? Death had occurred, and almost every cat in the forest would have to experience what it felt like to grieve when a cat that they loved or felt close to passed away. Everything around the calico tom was falling apart.

Lilacfall, his mother, was dead.

Nightpaw, his closest sister, was dead.

And now, Rosepaw, his mate, was dead. Well, no, they hadn't even been mates while she had been alive. They could've been, though... they could've had a future, and now there was nothing more for Newtface to look forward to.
"You wouldn't understand," The young warrior muttered, "You wouldn't get it... so before you say 'I know how you feel, Newtface', ask yourself if you really do know how I feel."

"I may not know exactly how you feel. I shouldn't have said it like that. Your burden is and most likely always will be unique to just you. But I still know what it's like to lose close ones. Lilacfall was my sister, and I've lost countless other brothers and sisters throughout the years. I never knew my mother, and... I did have a mate before I fell for Minnowpaw, but I've had to say goodbye to her as well. We all lose cats, it's a fact of life, but... my mate, my mother, and my siblings wouldn't want me to sulk around forever. They would want me to do all I can to protect and love those I still have. I'm sure Rosepaw would feel the same for you. I can't say for certain, but I have a pretty strong feeling; StarClan cats seem to have the same mindset." Scorchfang knew he shouldn't stay pestering Newtface forever, but he still hoped his words would have some meaning to the grieving tom.

Newtface silently and slowly let his claws slip out of their sheaths, and he forcefully buried them into the ground. He had had no idea that Scorchfang was even related to Lilacfall. Then again, it wasn’t like the tortoiseshell tom was actually Lilacfall’s real son. He was only adopted. He never knew his biological parents, but he often wondered what they were like.

“I bet my parents were awfully good looking and charismatic,” The former Newtface would’ve said, “I mean, where else would I get my natural charm and good-looks?”

Now, he didn’t even have the strength to put on a playful smirk. All he could do was weakly shake his head and look back over his shoulder so that he could mean Scorchfang’s gaze. Water was beginning to form a pool in the bottom of Newtface’s eyes once again, and some unlucky tears slipped down his cheek and onto the ground, right in front of his speckled paws.
“How am I supposed to keep going when I have nobody?” The tom suddenly growled, “You have Minnowpaw, and she has you. I lost Lilacfall, but I least I still had my sister and Rosepaw. Then, I lost Nightpaw and Rosepaw, and now I have nobody. All I have is myself. No cat should ever have to go through that, but yet I do. Why should I try to take time out of my day to go find another cat to love when I could get my heart broken once again? What would you do if Minnowpaw’s bloody, dead body was dragged back to camp one day?”

Scorchfang's ears fell, the sudden image of his dear beloved mate broken, bloody, and lifeless conjuring up in his mind. It would be so hard to go through life without her, and even if he did have his brothers and sister, life would still be unbearably hard without the unique-colored she-cat in his life. He sighed, then took a tentative step forward. "I... I'm afraid I can't say anything as far as mates go, but... I would be more than willing to be a friend of yours, one that most certainly wouldn't be going anywhere anytime soon. I know it won't be the same, but it'll still be something. I think it would be beneficial for not just you, but for me, too. Of course, you're free to decline the offer, but if you need some time to think about it that's fine, too. I want to help you, Newtface."

Newtface blinked, but he didn't show any indication of his decision, or any emotions he was feeling at the time. Scorchfang was offering to be his friend... but would that even change anything? Scorchfang wasn't family...
Scorchfang isn't Rosepaw...
However, where would he be if he was alone? Maybe it would just empower him and motivate him to become an even better warrior of ShadowClan. He'd focus solely on becoming the best cat he could be, on hunting for the Clan, and on protecting their borders and the cats of ShadowClan. Would it all be worth it, though, if he never had anybody to do it with him, and if he never had anybody by his side? Rosepaw would've been the cat by his side, and he would've been the cat by her side. It was far too late for that, though.
"I-I gu-guess..." He muttered, "I... guess that would be n-nice."