Consolation & Speculation [closed for Sunlitcastle]

Beetlelaw murmured something unhappily as he tended to the frozen body of Blazekit, moving carefully around the frostbit fragile kit. It was a truly unhappy time for WindClan, and he wondered how Jaypaw was doing in calming down the terrified queen and mother of the dead cat, Sandybreeze. He had much respect for the warroir, and he was sometimes shocked by how much older cats saw as special and experienced. But I'me just an apprentice, after all! a voice in his head complained, and the dark-furred cat frowned. After rubbing the small body with a clump of mint he had in his den and dumping away the small and now useless plant, the medicine cat apprentice stored the body in a sparce nest more towards the back, so Sandybreeze would not have to be confronted by the body of Blazekit. He needed to calm her down, not to frighten her worse.

"Jaypaw, Sandybreeze." Beetlepaw greeted the two she-cat in a mild tone. Jaypaw led the queen which Beetlepaw still suspected to be in shock to the den she herself had inhabited when she was recovering from the loss of her tail. The medicine cat apprentice was proud to see his best friend was doing well even without it, but he wondered whether she did not tell him the truth. He was skepticall about a tail-less cat to be able to crouch properly. "Sandybreeze, I will be preparing you a soothing mixture, to ease your nerves and help you sleep. Do not wlrry, I have sent apprentices to patch up the nursery so nothing like the death of Blazekit happens again. They will be keeping other kits warm." he assured her, before calling Jaypaw to him. The gray she-cat brushed her sleek pelt with a slightly jerk of her body when she slightly lost ballance, before they brought their head close together. "I need you to keep her busy and happy. Then bring me some prey so I can feed her the soothing herbs at the same time that she eats. This will do well to her strengh."

Sandybreeze followed Jaypaw into the medicine cat's den slowly, in a daze. She forced a small, fake smile onto her muzzle as Beetlepaw greeted her and Jaypaw. She sat down near Beetlepaw, staring at her paws, and nodding every now and then when he explained to her what he was going to give her and why. In all honesty, she wasn't really listening. She heard bits and pieces. 'Something something soothe your nerves.' 'Something patched up something wont happen again.' That was it. That was all she heard no matter how hard she tried to listen. All that she could think about was what she could've- no should've done to prevent her kits death, to keep him safe. She was his mother. She was supposed to protect him and love him and keep him warm, but she failed. Her worst nightmare had come true and it was all her fault. She kept imagining Falconstone's face and what it would look like once he found out. Full of horror and hatred and disappointment. She knew he would blame her. She blamed herself. What was she supposed to expect others to do besides blame her? She sniffed, holding back a sob, which turned into a sort of quiet whimper. She didn't say anything just waited for instructions.

ooc: my poor babs gonna spiral ;-;

The tail-less grya she-cat nodded to her best friend's words. She was too, dazed, but she knew that Sandybreeze must be going through a hard time, thinking about the death of her own kit. She padded closer to her, wrapjng her tail around her back and forcing a dry and not that reasuring purr down her throat. Beetlepaw was busying himself with nerbs, but she could see how his eyes slipped sometimes towards the nests by the back of his den. That's where the body must be. Good thing to hide it from view. she thought before returning her attention to the whimpering queen. "Shhhh... you can help the elders tend to his burial if you deisre. On his last path to StarClan." she meowed sweetly, exchanging a set of glances with the medicine cat, who seemed to half-heartedly disaproove.

Sandybreeze nodded towards Jaypaw, taking a deep breath in an attempt to steady herself. It helped. A little. "Yes.. I would." She paused, trying to steady her shaking voice. "Thank you." She meowed. She watched them intently, mostly Beetlepaw as he worked, to help keep her mind out of the darkness that threatened to swallow her. It worked for the most part and she also noticed how they seemed to almost talk through glances. She didn't think to hard about it for the moment because she noticed Beetlepaw's eyes glancing off somewhere she couldn't see every now and then. She tilted her head slightly when she realized what he must be looking at. "Is- " She started but stopped herself. She didn't wanna know, even though she kinda did. She couldn't say anything that implied her son was dead. That would make it all the more real and she couldn't make it real. Not yet. "Uh, what are they called? The, er, herbs I mean." She meowed quickly, changing her question.

The medicine cat apprentice finished the mixture with a satisfied smile, nosing the chewed down goatweed leaves with a slight dash of honey to make it sweeter. He summoned Jaypaw to him, the gray she-cat bounding up to him after she gave the queen a sweet smile. "Alright, being her some prey from the pile. If someone asks why you took it, tell them I asked for it." je instructed her firmly, but the apprentice smiled and flicked her stub of a tail over his face. He chuckled, staring slightly behind her with a longing smile. When he realized his silence, he snapped quickly back to his job. "Sandybreeze, erm... Alright, I'll be giving you some goatweed and honey with a piece of prey. Are you having headaches?" he asked, slighfly too embarassed to speak to her face to face, so he was bent and organizing his herbs back into place.

Sandybreeze attempted to return the grey apprentice's smile, but it probably seemed a bit forced. She had never been great and hiding her emotions. She watched as Beetlepaw instructed Jaypaw to gather her a piece of prey. It was obvious they were best friends just from the way they acted around each other. She smiled, actually smiled this time, as she remembered her and Falconstone when she was an apprentice. He was her best friend. That was when it dawned on her. The two apprentices probably had feelings for eachother. She wasn't sure what to do with her realization, and she wasn't sure she wanted to do anything about it either. They were young and maybe she was reading too much into the longing looks or flirty behavior. She blinked as she realized the medicine cat apprentice was talking to her. "O-Oh yeah okay." She nodded like she knew what the herbs he told her did. "Yeah, I do have a.. a little one. It's not too bad though." She answered honestly, watching the embarrassed tom busy himself with is work.

"A-Alright then... uhm, I'll add something for that in your food, just a bit." he murmured as he finished fitting everything up into it's place, flicking his tail as he settled down to rest a bit with the herbs at his paws. "Two goatweed leaves, small, a bit of honey, a small feverfew flowers." he said solemnly as Jaypaw was back. She laughed at his tone and flicked her stubby tail again over the embarassed face of the tomcat. Beetleoaw returned to his duties, taking the rabbit that his friend had brought in and stuffing it with the herbs he had talked about earlier.

"Alright, Sandybreeze, I'll be giving you these, they should help. I hope you can catch some sleep afterwards." he purred to the she-cat, handing her the prey with the herbs stuffed inside,

Sandybreeze nodded when Beetlepaw explained what else he'd add to the rabbit Jaypaw had brought for her. "Okay." She meowed, watching him finish his work to keep her mind from wandering. "Thanks." She murmured softly as he brought the rabbit to her. Beetlepaw was doing great, from what she could tell, without a full medicine cat her to train him. Despite not having much of a relationship with him, she as proud of him, and she hoped the rest of the clan realized how lucky they all were to have Beetlepaw as the medicine cat in training. "I hope so too." She laughed slightly to herself, knowing she was definitely not getting any sleep that night. She didn't want the apprentice to worry any more about her, so she busied herself with eating the rabbit, though she wasn't hungry in the least bit.

ooc: sorry this is so late ;-;